Reviewer: potterfan2008 Signed Date: 2018.05.17 - 11:49PM Title: Trouble
Oh no! I'm guessing the IRA is the Death Eater equivalent in this story - or maybe they really are Death Eaters. Its hard to tell. Poor Harry and Ginny - they both have some idea about magic, but obviously are very conflicted about it. I wonder if Hermione had experienced any accidental magic. It would probably freak her out and make her pull back into herself even more.
So very true -- Mione may not know the details, but I think we can trust her to be suspicious of this up-crop in domestic terror.
Yes, I'm afraid that the knowledge of magic for both Ginny and Harry is a bit of a pain and stain, a bit as it was for canon's pre-Hogwarts Harry. For Hermione (Mione), the only glimmer you have is her hesitation (Ch. 2) in giving a personalised answer to Ginny's question about e.s.p. and telekinesis. I am very close now, in first draft phase, to tackling the issue of how Mione will react to this very touchy issue. Tricky from a writing perspective, since even canon offers conflicting guidance; canonical Hermione is such an odd mix of plastic-thinking liberal, and rigid conservative.
Great review! Very helpful in setting the subconscious wheels turning toward their next big task.
Reviewer: Aragorn Signed Date: 2018.05.16 - 09:34PM Title: Trouble
"shallow as a squid tin"? Of course, you came up with that phrase.
Heh, yes. It's kind of rare that a simile seems called for (generally when needing to assimilate the silly) so I very rarely use them but, when called upon, it pays to be unique. Wrestled with that one for a while -- something that sounded 'catchy' (pun partly intended), and something one would be more likely to find at Tesco than Walmart :)
I think my fiction has always relied a bit on lyrics for A/N and, given my nature of the plot oscillations, it seems I could re-quote 'Why Worry Now?' five times a year.
Thank you so much for the touching boost of flattery! Definitely the right note on which to resume tearing apart / reassembling chapter 8. Cheers!
Reviewer: Aurorofthelight Signed Date: 2018.05.14 - 10:00AM Title: Trouble
THE LINK YOU POSTED FOR FANTASTIC BEASTS IS EXACTLY THE ONE I SAW IN MY THEATER WHEN I WENT TO SEE THE AVENGERS MOVIE.......COMES OUT NOVEMBER 16TH. THERE IS ALOT OF TALK AND EXCITEMENT ABOUT JUDE LAW AS DUMBLEDORE. LOOKS REALLY COOL!
Reviewer: Aurorofthelight Signed Date: 2018.05.13 - 07:56PM Title: Trouble
ON A SERIOUS NOTE, I DON'T ACTUALLY BELIEVE THOSE TRAILERS ARE REAL AND SITE READERS SHOULD BE WARNED!
Reviewer: Aurorofthelight Signed Date: 2018.05.13 - 07:49PM Title: Trouble
HARRY POTTER AND THE CURSED CHILD PART I
Reviewer: Aurorofthelight Signed Date: 2018.05.12 - 07:33PM Title: Trouble
PUT THE WORD OUT!! I'VE SEEN A PREVIEW FOR THE NEW FANTASTIC BEASTS "THE CRIMES OF GELLERT GRINDLEWALD"MOVIE COMING OUT IN DECEMBER! ALL THE CHARACTERS FROM THE FIRST ONE APPEAR TO BE IN IT AND JOHNNY DEPP PLAYS GRINDLEWALD AND THERE IS A NEW CHARACTER PLAYED BY JUDE LAW.....NONE OTHER THAN A YOUNGER ALBUS DUMBLEDORE!! LOOKS TERRIFIC AND I CAN'T WAIT! AUROROFTHELIGHT
Reviewer: RighT3rantZ Signed Date: 2018.05.10 - 09:46PM Title: Trouble
Glad you enjoyed the music selection. Yeah, couldn't be call and response, something missing.
True, as Trix, Splinters and TPC are fairly metaphorical, and FoT is a torrent of symbolism. This story is a bit more earthy and basic, but once you factor an apple, a ring, a veil, etc...
My other self is still asleep -- stuck in the wrong time zone perhaps. I'll ask him when he's awake.
Forgot to acknowledge your earlier Auclair vision -- intriguing. Could be the Portugal match, perhaps to be played in a new World Cup stadium down in Wiltshire. Taken under advisement -- thanks!
Reviewer: ellen Signed Date: 2018.05.10 - 04:52AM Title: Trouble
Time for some more stars, even though you won't get a clever review from me. I do like the little hints that are peppered throughout the narrative (even if I probably miss all but the most obvious) and its a good, unusual and interesting read even without playing detective.
Foremost and first, thank you for chiming in, Ellen! Great to hear from you!
It's interesting how an aspect of a story can take on a life of its own... in this case, the mystery. Oddly enough, at the outset, my driving interest was to explore the characters and their personal journeys upon being placed in rather unusual circumstances. There was also the element of a romance emerging above straining obstacles. To begin with, therefore, it didn't occur to me that the 'mystery' component (how did they get there? what will happen as old clashes with new?) would occupy much interest. Now that it has, of course, I'm embracing it, but the true original 'character study' goal is still what pushes the words onto the screen.
All that is a roundabout way of saying that I'm immensely pleased to hear your 'even without playing detective' clause, because that's what was there at the very beginning :)
Reviewer: TomBombadil Signed Date: 2018.05.09 - 08:37PM Title: Trouble
Two worlds circle and prepare to collide, methinks!
Good analogy! The metaphor works best when one plots out those Keplerian orbitals of two bodies in *slight* disequilibrium. This i to say that things may circle, and circle, a few times before the inevitable is realised.
Well, thank you most gratefully for your ever astute comments. Much appreciated!
Reviewer: RighT3rantZ Signed Date: 2018.05.09 - 04:17PM Title: Trouble
A direct continuance from last chapter, excellent. Just a moment ago Harry was spellbound by the lyrics for Ginny's song coming from a female voice. Of course it was her he comes to find out... Yet, he is so enthralled to be in this mysterious young lady's presence that the significance of her singing the song he wrote seemed to fade from his awareness. Magnifique!
The Wailers! As in Marley, Livingston & Tosh! Sorry for the delayed reaction -- I am showing my limitationss, I fear. And the Maytals coined the word Reggae? Wow, one learns lots of wild stuff in this line of recreation :) Anyway, I appreciate the song -- moving stuff!
Forbidden / apple? Now who the heck is going to notice a tiny detail like that? Now you're going to think the next chapter is merely belabouring the symbol.
Glad you enjoyed the internal dialogue as there was rather a lot of it. It was indeed intended to flow better than the spoken word. I've experienced conversations like that. I believe I've created such conversations by over-internalising.
Case of calamitous-chaos-causing clarity? Your last name wouldn't be Gravener, would it?
I'm fairly certain that I was supposed to say something else, but my brain has faded into the fog... Perhaps more later.
Thank you for transcending!
Reviewer: snapelover Signed Date: 2018.05.09 - 01:06PM Title: Trouble
Sorry for not having reviewed earlier. This is a great story. Very novel!
Reviewer: MollyandArthur Signed Date: 2018.05.09 - 05:36AM Title: Trouble
A lot of self-reflection going on in this chapter by Harry and Ginny. I love the way you wove in a few snippets of their past experiences. You've answered some of my unasked questions while of course creating more. Interesting how Ginny pieced together that they both have powers. I'm glad she seemed comfortable with the idea in the end. Could lead to a fascinating conversation eventually ;) Harry is definitely a bit lost in thoughts and feelings. Music seems to currently be his only outlet though I have no doubt that will soon change :) The end worries me - leading to a slew of questions - Is Voldemort alive? Are his followers behind these attacks? Do they know about Harry? Are they searching for Harry? Is anyone trying to protect Harry? If so, how? I could go on but will leave it there. Greatly looking forward to reading the next chapter!
Aha, you *did* read through carefully, didn't you!
This story is far less impenetrable than FoT was, so the shape of some answers does begin to resolve bit by bit. But there are a few surprises. This is to say that not all of your y/n questions are answered 'yes'. There is one crucial one where the answer is 'mostly not'. The answer to your 'how' question will begin to resolve in chapters 7,8.
As to your suggestion of a fascinating eventual conversation, might I suggest that there is a bit of a musicalis interruptus element to this story when it comes to details. This ties way back to the fundamental unasked question that I hinted at some time ago.
Finally, I'm glad you did recognise the significant positive in the chapter. It comes into play rather soon.
Wonderful comments! Thank you, K!
Author's Response: Correction: given some on-the-fly editing, some salient hints are now present in chapters *6*, 7 and 8.
Reviewer: Aurorofthelight Signed Date: 2018.05.08 - 01:38PM Title: Trouble
Not sure why you are thinking of moving this story from this site, which is my favorite, but I guess sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do! So Harry and Ginny finally meet and it seems they are infatuated with each other! As I read about their meeting I was listening to an oldies station on my stereo who coincidentally started playing "Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You" (Franki Vali and the Four Seasons 1967)!:
Hey Cosmo! Many thanks for a two-song review! I am, quite simply, honoured!
If/when I make the switch-over, I'll dash you an e-mail with details, explanations, etc. I do intend to continue supporting SIYE, if perhaps mostly in an administrative/cheerleading role. Writing remains a passion, and this story continues to be a hoot to craft, but there are reasons to seek fresh horizons.
IRA! Yes, and no. You may recall that the last true terrorist action of the long-standing IRA conflict was the May 1996 Manchester bombing, however in 2000-2001 a splinter group calling themselves "The Real IRA" rose up in protest of the peace negotiations, and started bombing stuff. That's what the characters keep hearing about. Or is it??
Non Sequitur? Actually I was just getting all fancy literary on you however, having searched for the comic and having seen Danae typing into a Dead-Head-Apple MacIntosh, I find myself on the verge of another bad habit! Thank you. I think...
Yes, lots and lots of feelings in this chapter! Do they feel love or magic? I think in chapter 2, they felt magic (perhaps more than just their own magic too), however now I state with optimism that there is more. Unless you say that 'love' is 'magic', in which case perhaps there are different types of magic.
Why did the recollection of the schoolyard incident pop into Ginny's head? Perhaps because the authour wants you to know that, despite her chary reticence, she's no shrinking violet. Or, perhaps because that somewhat scarring image pops into her head whenever something is trying to warn her off the infamous 'forbidden'. Ye shall finde out!
Bourbon on the rocks! You *know* that's a fitting way to end this particular chapter. Merci Beaucoup!
Reviewer: Gin110881 Signed Date: 2018.05.08 - 08:07AM Title: Trouble
The opening scene almost felt like the famous butter dish scene, however, this time with butter dishes for both, lol.
Two butter dishes -- great analogy. Thank you! Yes, that depiction of awkwardness is highly intentional, and may even go a little beyond the 'starstruck youth' motif. In fact, a very key undercurrent in most of this chapter relates to the 'key unasked question' that I'd hinted at a few chapters back.
Glad that Harry's anxious doubts worked for you! There are several key messages in all of that. One is that Harry, despite having some major plusses in his life, is no super-Harry. He's a nice fellow, but a bit of a mess in ways that differ a bit from his canon issues.
Dudley! To be brutally honest, I was still (in this freewheeling story) wrestling with the question of whether the bully was anyone in particular. I figured that he was not Crabbe or Goyle, since they're far to thick to achieve dominance. I somehow didn't realise that I could well be writing a Harry-less version of Dudley. That may stick!
The mystery behind the mystery will gradually unfold, however the mystery behind the mystery behind the mystery is why the unfolding occurs so slowly.
Believe it or not, the above statement was semi-fundamental, rather than the gibberish that it might seem ;)
Yes, I'm still working on formatting annoyances, but will absolutely let you know if/when/where I relocate the story.
As always, thank you Martin!