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SIYE Time:10:53 on 17th December 2017


Reviewer: wq123 Anonymous Date: 2016.08.19 - 09:45PM Title: Chapter 1

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Author's Response: *

[Respond: In Review]


Reviewer: InwoodHP Signed Date: 2015.01.12 - 12:45AM Title: Chapter 1

starstarstarstarstar

Lovely

Author's Response: Thank you!



Reviewer: riegert8 Signed Date: 2014.06.15 - 10:56PM Title: Chapter 1

starstarstarstarstar

No Review



Reviewer: My Wicked Quill Signed Date: 2013.06.10 - 09:24PM Title: Chapter 1

starstarstarstarstar

No Review



Reviewer: santafe Signed Date: 2013.02.18 - 05:30PM Title: Chapter 1

starstarstarstarstar

I've just found this and read it right through. Then I read it again. Really enjoyable read, and the reasoning and logic behind why Harry has always been a bit detached was faultless. I really liked the concept and will definitely look for more from you. many thanks for sharing it. - SF

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I think Harry's upbringing has affected him in a number of ways.



Reviewer: TomBombadil Signed Date: 2012.05.16 - 11:58PM Title: Chapter 1

starstarstarstar

Really cute and touching. I can easily see your premise here with the orphan boy who has never known love, and then ends up with a fireball like Ginny! Another good effort on your part!

Author's Response: Thanks so much! I'm glad you are enjoying my writing. I really enjoyed exploring how Harry's upbringing has affected his life.



Reviewer: butterfly Signed Date: 2011.01.16 - 03:49AM Title: Chapter 1

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No Review



Reviewer: NotACat Signed Date: 2009.09.18 - 06:11AM Title: Chapter 1

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That's rather nice, I like that.

Author's Response: Thanks!



Reviewer: Yunchao Signed Date: 2009.09.14 - 11:44PM Title: Chapter 1

Good job! I liked the detail and all of the dialog between Harry and Ginny. It gives a really good picture of their relationship. I've just read this story for judging. Thanks for writing!

Author's Response: Thanks!



Reviewer: pippan121 Signed Date: 2009.09.13 - 04:15PM Title: Chapter 1

That was so sweet!

Author's Response: Thanks!



Reviewer: Spenser Hemmingway Signed Date: 2009.09.10 - 10:18AM Title: Chapter 1

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Yes, painting is romantic--although my wife doesn't think so. I like the way you present an almost hopeless Harry, and then smoothly demonstrate his changing dramatically over that short time. You also gave us a nice insight into why he was that way, with good examples to back your case. It flowed well. Thanks for a good story--Eric B.

Author's Response: Thanks!



Reviewer: GREYWOLF Signed Date: 2009.09.10 - 09:13AM Title: Chapter 1

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Just a lovely story. And I quit agree that Harry would be the cautious one in the relationship, because of his upbringing. Way to go Ginny.

Author's Response: Thanks!



Reviewer: Zoltan42 Signed Date: 2009.08.31 - 02:37PM Title: Chapter 1

I really should proofread these before I click on "Submit", especially if I'm making comments on grammar.

Anyway, "I do agree with DukeBrymin's comment on In fact, I had copied the same passage (in my case including the other line)."

That should have read "I do agree with DukeBrymin's comment on the placement of the physical responses to quoted text. In fact, I had copied the same passage (in my case including the other line).

Author's Response: Thanks!



Reviewer: Zoltan42 Signed Date: 2009.08.31 - 01:46PM Title: Chapter 1

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Very nice. Some of the other stories, at least to me, make Harry to be a little too much (I believe the British term is) pants at romance rather than just not being able to verbalize it or show it. I got more of a sense that it was there and it just needed a nudge, rather than an aggressive push.

I do agree with DukeBrymin's comment on In fact, I had copied the same passage (in my case including the other line).

“So do you know what we’re doing for your birthday yet?” Harry shook his head.

“Not really. I know your mum is planning a party. Andi and Teddy are coming over, but I don’t really know many details.”

By putting the quote and the response in the same paragraph, at first it seems it was Harry who was talking. Having to re-read these to make sure who is talking messed up the flow.

The following would have flowed better.

So do you know what we’re doing for your birthday yet?”

Harry shook his head. “Not really. I know your mum is planning a party. Andi and Teddy are coming over, but I don’t really know many details.”



Author's Response: Thanks for the review (both of them). Now that I reread the sentence both you and DukeBrymin commented on, I can see your point. I will certainly keep it in mind for future writing. I really appreciate any constructive criticism.



Reviewer: DukeBrymin Signed Date: 2009.08.31 - 09:50AM Title: Chapter 1

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Cute story, I enjoyed reading it very much.

A couple of issues that I noticed:

Maybe I missed it, but I didn't see what Tuesday's word was.

One slightly confusing thing is that lots of times you have someone's speech, then the other person's physical response on the same line. That makes it kind of hard to distinguish who's talking. Here's an example:
“So do you know what we’re doing for your birthday yet?” Harry shook his head.

Ginny acts really surprised that Harry has come to her Quidditch games, but earlier, Harry told her that he and Teddy would attend them together.

Anyway, very sweet story--I like seeing Harry start to open up, and Ginny realize that Harry really _can_ be romantic. Very nice.

Author's Response: Thanks! You\'re right, I must have edited out Tuesday\'s word which was fun - thanks for noticing. I did miss the part about the Quidditch games.



Reviewer: Bethina Signed Date: 2009.08.30 - 05:16AM Title: Chapter 1

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Cute. A very enjoyable read.

Author's Response: Thanks!



Reviewer: Narglesarereal Signed Date: 2009.08.29 - 07:50PM Title: Chapter 1

starstarstarstar

very very cool story!

Author's Response: Thanks!




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