|SIYE Time:10:37 on 23rd March 2018|
Reviewer: Gin110881 Signed
2017.09.21 - 05:15PM
Happy New Year?
I'm not sure if it is a prejudice or a brilliant idea, but I wonder if Bella managed to somehow imperious Zabini to lure Harry and Ginny to the public with his circus to make them vulnerable. Or is the author using Zabinis Circus to distract the reader from more important things.
I really like Harry's train of thoughts. Teri looks like Bella, who looks like Andromeda. It doesn't seem too farfetched that Teri is a Black, too. Somehow I'm pretty sure that Teri's ancestry will have a very simple explanation.
Ah, Ron's missing his boxers. Seems the purple stocking man got hold of his dirty laundry. I wonder if Remus is also missing parts of his underwear. Nott jr., too?
Somehow I have the same feeling I had when I read the story the first time. Obviously, someone is practising with easy targets, to be proficient with his or her weapons when he or she will try to kill his or her real targets. Maybe practicing is also necessary to learn to bypass the occlumency shields of the real targets.
Teri's encounter with Tonks was quite noteworthy. I wonder if Teri is a kind of medium who witnesses the "accidents", and was shocked when she suddenly saw a victim of a former vision when she met Tonks.
Interesting questions that bring me back to the back-and-forth dialogue with readers during Splinters!
One answer I shall grant and that is that Zabini is not Imperiused. He is just a Slytherin, acting in his own interests, as you intuited in the earlier review. As far as other questions... who knows? All depends on just how demented the authour is, right?
As far as your observation that the villain is practising... brilliant! No denying that one.
And finally, yes, Teri's response to Tonks is indeed noteworthy, and in a manner that is 'similar' but not exactly what you've pegged.
Keep guessing and I will... keep you guessing ;)
Reviewer: MollyandArthur Signed
2016.04.10 - 09:48AM
Happy New Year?
A lot of intrigue in this story. I am enjoying the way you are developing the characters and showing the odd events occurring to them. All of it almost seems like an elaborate prank, but it is cruel and potentially deadly, so prank doesn't really cover it, unless the culprit is a psychopath and sociopath.
An elaborate prank? Absolutely! That, of course, is the name of the story and, ultimately, these are not jests worthy of wholesome laughter. The culprit appears to be someone with some intelligence and an absolutely reprehensible sense of humour. Do we know anyone like that in the Harry Potter universe?
Different people might answer the above question in different ways but it is always okay to simply answer 'no'.
Great to hear that you're enjoying the character development!
Reviewer: MisterBlack Signed
2016.03.22 - 05:17PM
Happy New Year?
"Harry and Ginny arrived at their usual spot — a small clearing within a tight thicket of trees at the far end of a fairly empty car park on the outskirts of a Muggle neighbourhood near Maidstone. They had chosen the site several months ago for caution and discretion. A noisy Apparition by the twins outside their house had necessitated Obliviating several Muggles, and alerted Harry and Ginny to possible security issues associated with even a relatively small number of guests appearing in the neighbourhood from time to time. Given their natural caution, they had found this thicket, erected notice-me-not charms about it, and now used it exclusively. This meant they now had a bit of a walk to contend with each time they traveled to and from the property, but that was a small price to pay for peace of mind. "
Why not just apparate directly into their home? Even if they had wards they would be allowed in since it is their home. I would imagine that hide away spot is great for guests but for them they could just go directly home, no? If I remember correctly from HBP when Harry posed the same question to Dumbledore (before meeting Slughorn) he said it was to not be rude and to give people a chance to NOT invite in guests if they do not want it. So it certainly is possible.
With that said... I like your Zabini. He is usually portrayed as some sex deviant. Some pureblood bigot that is just interested in money and women. Considering who his mother is and her reputation I would not fault anyone for portraying him in the same manner.
Either way, I think you have created a very likeable Zabini. He is funny, witty, and overall a fun guy to be around.
I am absolutely fascinated with Harry's inner dialogue. THIS is why I always say he would make an amazing auror. He always picks up on the small things and small quirks people have. In canon he usually knows when Ron or any of the Weasleys are lying or embarrassed. He notices how red their ears get.
it is these small things that will propel Harry to be a very effective auror if he were to choose to be one. His mind just naturally works in investigative mode. If he had just as much natural aptitude towards research and books as Hermione then I dare say he would rival or even surpass the great Dumbledore. Alas... I think he only really does heavy research when it is absolutely in need and that is usually at the last hour. Nevertheless... he gets the job done.
I am relieved he is starting to notice these small little quirks going on around him. I was afraid he would be just as clueless as he was in canon. I always felt JK Rowling made Harry a bit thick at times. I love Hermione as much as any character but she cannot possibly be the only smart one.
Anyway... he really should begin to learn how to mask his magical signature. Bellatrix has honed in on him and I would not be surprised if he manages to do something to Harry while he is teaching at Hogwarts.
Well for the moment this is all that is coming to mind. If I think of something else then I guess I will bring it up in the next review. Cheers!
PS: The old couple that helped Harry and Ginny (sorry I forget their names at the moment) did you think them up on your own or were they inspired by Nicolas and Perenelle Flamel? I know we do not know much about that couple in canon but I have read countless fics where they are in some way responsible for Harry or a mentor of some kind and they often are portrayed as some mystical with and wizard that keep mostly to themselves and have a vast knowledge of really powerful magic.
Ah yes. As far as Magpie Lane is concerned, Remus and Harry threw every ward they could think of into safeguarding the place. Consequently, it has ended up with Hogwarts-like restrictions so that Apparition directly into the premises is impossible, even by the most trusted of individuals. Thus, just as Dumbledore (canonically) could not Apparate to and from Hogwarts, Harry and Ginny must take a bit of a walk. A similar level of precaution has been instituted for Dolwyddelan. It's not a big plot point, but it does amount to a potential complication, especially in circumstances where time is of the essence.
Great to see that I won you over with Zabini. He grates a fair bit more than he ingratiates, and his primary allegiance is to himself, but he has not (and never truly will) let either Harry or Ginny down. I suspect many of us have had friends like that -- someone who alternates been flippant irreverence and respectful sobriety depending on the circumstances; never needles hard enough to draw blood, but also seems to be reliably intent on puncturing any ego that appears to be inflating.
Yes, Harry and Ginny are both hypervigilant, even under relaxing circumstances. This attribute again dates back to Matt's description of how Harry's revelations in Occlumency were truly transformative in the way he saw the world, and committed himself to perceiving and understanding it. As a result, I definitely agree -- Harry would make an exceptional Auror. Ginny too, but I've already basically plotted paths for them that leads toward a canonical career for her. At least in terms of professional Quidditch. I frankly cannot see anyone of her talents becoming a sports writer...
Good question about the Flamels vs. the Fugos. I do now recognise that other fanfics did indeed craft the Flamels as semi-mystic mentors rather analogous to what I conjured for the Fugos. At the time that I wrote TPC, though, I had not yet seen the Flamels written into roles like that, and really only knew of them as alchemists who faded away after the destruction of the Philosophers Stone. In retrospect, if I had thought to somehow extend their lives a few years and employ them as pre-existing quantities, I think it would have been preferable... since in fanfic its generally a bit better to recycle than to create completely anew.
Anyway, thank you very much for your thoughts!
Reviewer: Gin110881 Signed
2015.07.18 - 08:48AM
Happy New Year?
You've asked if I had a peek into chapter 9. I really don't know. I have never read consciously forward. However, before I start to read a story I always check a few things, such as word count for Ginny and Harry (to verify whether my precious favourite character is sufficiently involved in the story), plus Auror, Quidditch and Harpies.
Auror Harry and Quidditch Queen Ginny stories I'm usually avoiding. Recently I got into a Malfoy Ginny romance accidentally and nearly vomited. I was sick for three days and urgently needed to read a nice Soul Bond story to become healthy again. Ever since then I usually also check for Draco and Malfoy and skim and the appearances. I checked the docx again for amateurish and found it next to the word Ginny. Maybe I have seen it before, but not consciously.
However, during a longer bus ride, where reading was not possible, I thought a little about the incidents with Ron and Remus. During Ron's incident it seemed as if someone forced him to this manoeuvre, but then lost control over him. If someone wants to really harm him he controls the stunt until the end to make sure that Ron did not survive. Apparently, this control was missing in the end. Remus incident is a bit more dubious. We still do not know if the Ogden's was the trigger. Tonks has not yet submitted her results. Hence, only the author knows it. But no matter. It certainly was not planned that Remus apparates. The end of the incident was somehow accidental, uncontrolled. As if someone puts something in motion and loses control at the end. Then I looked for the best translation for dilettantisch. My dictionary asserts that the translation is amateurish.
Another thing that bothered me was that it certainly was the same bottle of Odgen's as at Christmas. Was Remus the wanted target? And was the stunt already planned for Christmas? OK, if that thought is relevant or not depends on Tonks analysis of the Odgen’s, right?
Btw, Calibre can also convert pdf to epub. However, the result often looks a bit lousy. However, I can live without the extra separators in the epub, so please do not spent extra effort. I think my gibberish is enough distraction. Everyone is waiting for the next chapter and I'm to blame for the delayed publication.
Author's Response: Quick note to say that I'll be traveling for the next little while. Expect a proper response to your intriguing inquiries fairly soon... Thanks!
Your characterisations of the mode and effectiveness of sabotage are spot on (and are ahead of what our protagonists have thus far concluded). It is indirectly implied in Chapter 9 that the Ogdens analysis comes back negative, although perhaps I should tweak that text a bit to explicitly confirm this. And yes, it is not a cause, though perhaps a facilitator.
Reviewer: Gin110881 Signed
2015.07.17 - 03:56AM
Happy New Year?
I happy for the kids that they can have their fun. I am not even surprised that the Hogwarts students are allowed to form such a Quidditch team. I wonder, however, that the Hogwarts students are allowed to leave the Hogwarts grounds to play Quidditch anywhere in Britain (and even in Europe?). Despite the fact that Bella is waiting somewhere out there. Usually this was possible in urgent family matters only. Are these the impact of the new times? I will not complain, I'm just amazed.
The Joke with Seeker Hagrid was delicious. Kudos Zabini!
Ron's interrogation delivered some very interesting details. It's a pity that we didn't learn in the first chapter, to whom all the clothes belong and to whom the voice belongs. Although for the latter, I have a very specific suspicion. :-)
The conversation between Ginny and Harry was very interesting again. I wonder when Ginny addresses her problem from the first chapter. It seemed very important and urgent for her, but still she seem to avoid the subject with Harry.
Oh, what a surprise. Harry wants to say goodbye to Hogwarts. Hmm, there was just pointed out what a good teacher Harry is and how much fun his has teaching. However, I am looking forward to listening to their plans for the future. As they both love to fly, from my point of view a job in the Racing Broom development would be a good idea. Their qualifications would for sure be adequate. On the other hand, when has anybody ever listened to my proposals, lol.
Looking at their tight schedule, I ask honestly myself, why Harry may be bored. They constantly have appointments and research projects. If I were in Harry's shoes, I would complain that I didn't have enough comfort alone time with a specific redhead. Tss, the youth of today.
Ah yes. The Tonks / Remus incident. The incidents are all a bit mysterious and seem to be done amateurish.
Almost as if someone practice things, to be sure to get the desired result with the right target later on. Apparently, in every case somebody is forced to do things that harm himself. Everything happens under circumstances as unsuspicious as possible.
Maybe they should ask the Fugo's advice. Given that I have already read their names, I assume that they will also play a role in this story. (However, to be honest, the magic of the Fugo's is also a little scary to me. It's kind of intangible. As Physics for a mathematician ....)
Many thanks for sharing another great instalment. Thank you!
P.S. (related to your earlier responses)
I’m relieved that Ginnys fate as Quidditch Queen is not part of this story. I really don’t want to know how often she was the PlayWizard Centerfold and how often her escort services for the club sponsors were require. I wonder if she would tell Harry about such services.
Regarding the generation of eBooks, I use the 'print story' option to copy&paste the whole story into an odt or docx file. Than I do a little formatting, e.g. to the chapter headers, to get a proper index after conversion. I manage all my eBook’s with a tool called Calibre. Calibre includes some conversion options and you can generate several eBook formats, even the Amazon format. Maybe I should try another copy&paste option to get the separators. You are right the double lines look kind of cool in the browser, so there is no need to change the things just for me. Try to keep the format of your story consistent.
Regarding the mobility of people like Summerby, Blaise and Daphne, it has to do with of-age students (mostly seventh years) being permitted to request passes. The back-story is never firmly stated, but MacGonagall's policy change on this relates to the number of students doing work for the ministry, as well as pursuits such as the Dolwyddelan safe house. Later on there are more discussions about such passes because of the issue of whether one student in particular would be able to safely leave Hogwarts grounds. Anyway, it's a good thing to bring up, and may warrant more direct in-text explanation on my part.
The question of whom the voice in the first chapter belongs to may remain unresolved for quite a while, as is true with other details, and to the answers to some other questions you have been asking. All questions are exquisitely worthwhile, but for a certain class of them I reserve the authourial prerogative to continue obfuscations.
You are indeed correct that in this story, the complex weave does raise many threads that dangle for some time. In TPC, I made a point of pride of tying up all major loose threads, and hope to do so in this story too, but Trix is far more complex and less linear. The issue of Ginny's power, once raised at the start, falls into the background for a long time. It is crucial in the end, but receives only a few mentions during the vast stretch in between. Mental note to self: Chapter 10 would be a great time to remind readers of this open plot point.
'Amateurish'? Did you skip ahead and skim Chapter 9, or are you really on such a plane of cognitive syncronicity with Ginny? You haven't even seen half of the shenanigans yet, but have already clued into a key plot point. I'm impressed!
More allusions to the Fugos with respect to Ginny's power, and in the tense episode in Black and Blue. They never figure prominently (after all, they're essentially dead, though in truth they will never completely abandon our protagonists. And yes, their magic is very scary in its own way. Maybe at some point I will write a story that more directly features them; their mind powers I view as being somewhat akin to the cerebral sorcery as encountered in the Carlos Castaneda books (if you ever want to read some truly creepy stuff).
Can you handle PDFs? I would prefer to not leave docx or odt files available for download, because I like to personally control the editing process, but I'd be perfectly happy to post PDF chapters on my personal fic/fanfic page if you'd like.
Reviewer: aimless Signed
2014.12.26 - 04:46PM
Happy New Year?
I'm looking forward to see some sport action and now you tell there's problem with free time. (((( Anyway, interesting chapter, some fun and some things to think about.
Author's Response: Well, given very specific requests like that, I might be able to deliver in a more timely fashion. The main plot line to Trix is a complex, delicate critter, but the Flying Circus exploits form a distinct subplot and tend to write themselves.
Reviewer: Dad Signed
2014.12.26 - 01:42PM
Happy New Year?
If Draco knows her name, surely he knows who her (Terri) parents were?
Author's Response: Does Draco know, but is not telling? Does he know as much as anybody else seems to, which seems to be underwhelming? Does he know less than he thinks? More than he wants to? Hmmm....
Reviewer: skiutahnum1 Signed
2014.12.26 - 08:13AM
Happy New Year?
Well nothing us going right anywhere now isit...poor Harry stuck in the middle again....kutgw
Author's Response: Hassles and perturbations! Better than hexes and peril? Time will tell! Thank you for the review!
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