Search:

SIYE Time:11:22 on 19th September 2017


Reviewer: DukeBrymin Signed Date: 2015.02.26 - 04:15PM Title: Chapter 1

Glad you're writing this part--I thought before that I'd like to see the intervening years.

Author's Response: Thanks. Glad you wanted to see it. Now I just need to finish it. :)



Reviewer: ellen Signed Date: 2015.02.26 - 02:58PM Title: Chapter 1

starstarstarstarhalf-star

I'm really pleased to see that you're writing more to this story - I loved the premise of the original. It's so nice to see that a mature Ron has stuck by Harry through thick and thin, and I liked the way you showed the easy sibling relationship between him and Ginny. Looking forward to more.

Author's Response: Thanks. I'm glad you liked the original and I agree that the story needed more. I wrote a Ron who had grown up in response to all the stories that bash Ron by having Ron act like a moron. Canon Ron may have had his immaturity issues, but he should be allowed to grow up too. People remember the times Ron had a falling out with Harry, but not all the loyalty he displayed the vast majority of the time. I'm glad you enjoyed the sibling relationship between Ron and Ginny. I'm looking forward to completing the next chapter.



Reviewer: Marinka Signed Date: 2015.02.25 - 05:18PM Title: Chapter 1

starstarstarstar

This is a good start but your writing style in my opinion needs a bit more work.

I think your dialogue would benefit if you would write the narrative that goes with the scene, and the normal speaker attributions and tags. It would make it more “real” if you like.


Author's Response: Thanks for reading and thanks for the advice. I've edited the story.




../back
‘! Go To Top ‘!

Sink Into Your Eyes is hosted by Computer Partners. HARRY POTTER, characters, names and related characters are trademarks of Warner Bros. TM & © 2001-2006. Harry Potter Publishing Rights © J.K.R. Note the opinions on this site are those made by the owners. All stories(fanfiction) are owned by the author and are subject to copyright law under transformative use. Authors on this site take no compensation for their works. This site © 2003-2006 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Special thanks to: Aredhel, Kaz, Michelle, and Jeco for all the hard work on SIYE 1.0 and to Marta for the wonderful artwork.
Featured Artwork © 2003-2006 by Yethro.
Design and code © 2006 by SteveD3(AdminQ)
Additional coding © 2008 by melkior and Bear