Reviews For Splinters
Reviewer: TomBombadil Signed Date: 2017.02.01 - 02:41PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
I'm just going to leave a short note to say how exciting this is as I hurry to turn the chapter page! Truth ber too, I already turned it, then cam back brecause I realized you deserved a review and a 10!
Ah, merveilleux! I have to admit, personally, that I'm not always the best reviewer in giving each chapter its due, however I do know that authors greatly appreciate incremental feedback.
So, thank you again, o' Iarwain Ben-adar!
Reviewer: MisterBlack Signed Date: 2015.11.19 - 12:42PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Haha, GHL. I can never stay too far away. Just one other thing I wanted to bring up that got my attention:
Interesting choice of quotes to pull -- rather scholarly of you! Yes, those passages definitely show an emergent maturity that, in canon, probably did not take hold until maybe when Harry took his solitary walk out to the Forbidden Forest. One indeed would wonder how canon would have unfolded differently if events had conspired to right his ship around his fifteenth birthday? And, theoretically, that is what this story lays the foundation for...
I say 'theoretically' because, of course, I did not have original plans to follow through that far. The premise of this story, basically, is that evil interference can destroy Harry's chances for attaining even the Pyrrhic victory that JKR gave him. Resolution of the premise, therefore, is for Harry and Ginny to at least preserve (or restore) a viable path to success. The story would thus end at this restoration of 'hope'.
You are correct, of course, that the precise road to defeating Voldemort would differ from canon, and perhaps it would be more 'uplifting', and less 'harrowing' (no Dean Thomas assinity, no veil, and Umbridge wouldn't stand a chance). The problem is that after reading scads of different horcrux hunt renditions, it is hard to gin up enthusiasm for another. I think I can wind down the Fuddle Fog trilogy in satisfying fashion without mucking about in horcruxes, but I haven't yet thought of a truly unique way to take down Voldemort in a Splinters sequel. Though technically, I might just now be getting the barest glimmer of an idea. Eep.
Thank you again for keeping me on my toes, MisterBlack!
Reviewer: MisterBlack Signed Date: 2015.11.18 - 10:46PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Arch! Overall that is the complete summation of my feelings! Ron Weasley honestly has to be the most daft Griffindor to ever grace the halls of Hogwarts. Honestly, look I understand it is his sister and if it were in any other situation I would feel sympathetic but the guy is a moron. Straight up. I don't say that for coming to the conclusion that something may be happening. No, I come to that conclusion because he never stops to think. He does not reflect on the situation at all. He just reacts. He is an idiot. Honestly it baffles me that Hermione would ever find him attractive. If he were to stop and think for a moment and if there were reason to act that way then I would understand but he doesn't. He just reacts and he is a liability. Believe me I would be able to sympathize. I have a sister and may God protect any man who would dare try to take advantage of her. Nevertheless I would not just jump to conclusion because I trust my sister to not let any man just take advantage of her. That is the difference.
Great points, as always -- thank you!First of all, my compliments on a review that would be prodigious even if not considering the fact that it was typed into a phone. I appreciate anyone who takes the time to think, muse and comment!
Regarding Ron, I have frequently asked myself why I, like so many fanfic writers, pick on him. And then I remember the obvious -- JKR had a penchant for trashing him in ways that left indelible stain. She might have written Ron as a decent bloke about 70% of the time, and as annoying but tolerable another 15%, but it is always that remaining 15% (e.g., Ron's response to the Triwizard Tournament in GoF; Ron's explosion during the camping exile in DH) that define who he is to many of us -- prickly, selfish and impetuous. It is far too easy to write him that way, and to define roles for him that emphasize those traits. I feel sorry for him but then again, no I don't.
Hermione, by contrast, is a more complex character and consequently is more fun to write. A lot of people do see her as a unidimensional nag / know-it-all and, although that has to be a part of any characterisation, there is also a certain subtle warmth and humanity that JKR began to nurture as time went on in the series. Yes, there are those grating episodes like the confiscation of Harry's Firebolt and anything to do with S.P.E.W., but on the other hand there's also that hint of fire in her eyes when she leads Harry on a few blatantly illegal capers (time turners, anyone?), and also the sisterly comfort that she provided as the horcrux hunt wore down. My Hermione characterisation blends those. Yes, she is crabby, heavy-handed and meddlesome, but on the other hand, when confronted by Harry's and Ginny's strengths and convictions, she is proving amenable to a supporting role.
And finally yes, you have raised the issue of the direct superposition on Harry and Ginny upon the Publican and princess personae. My thought, early on, was that these vignettes would be like what I call 'movie' dreams. Those are dreams where we find ourselves acting dramatic roles that we know are not ourselves, but the experience nonetheless seems very personal. By chapter 7, the cracks in this scheme are already showing for reasons that will become apparent, and the paradigm is clearly discarded in chapter 9 (and onwards) for the simple reason that the ancient and modern duos, although blessed with similar personalities, are distinct in their goals and instincts. By the time you get to chapter 9, I would appreciate your revisiting this question. It is a tricky undertaking, and perhaps it will prove to be a strength of the story, or perhaps a weakness.
Reviewer: LysCsuri Signed Date: 2015.09.11 - 08:31AM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Oh, creepy creepy CREEPY! Don't read that Great Hall scene aloud in a dark room! Brrrr!
I have to admit that the darkness in that scene bothered me, and I'm the authour. Nonetheless, I've known for some time now that the scene would have to be in there in order to truly establish the motivation and put the stakes in context.
Great to hear that you enjoyed the chapter nonetheless! Thank you for reviewing, Lys!
Reviewer: KateP Signed Date: 2015.09.06 - 12:47PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Wow each chapter just gets better and better I can always tell a good story for me it's not only one that makes you think which this does but also it makes you when you have ended the chapter sad there is no more to read
I'm sincerely flattered -- thank you most graciously, KateP!
I'm sad, of course, that you're sad to reach the end of a chapter, but happily, with the inspiration of several of the most effusive reviewers such as yourself, I got a good bit of writing done on Chapter 6 today and things are definitely looking good for posting it in the coming week.
Yes, if I ever would have expected JKR to use a single word other than 'brainy' to describe Miss Granger, 'loyal' would surely have to be very high on the list. She was frequently hard to get along with, but she stuck with Harry through a far greater number of difficult situations than anyone else, including Ron. I could never imagine Hermione as Harry's love interest because a) Ginny is a far better match for that, and b) Hermione would have driven him bonkers anyway, but it has been fun to write her in as the close friend she was intended to be -- betimes-bossy/prickly but always (as you say) loyal.
And yes, then there's Ron. Remind me to hand the boy a shovel or a ladder (or something) one of these chapters...
Greatly appreciating your kind comments!
Reviewer: Prof McGonagall Signed Date: 2015.09.06 - 12:16AM Title: A Godson and a Princess
This has got to be THE best story I have read in many YEARS!
Wow -- a review like that certainly justifies the time spent in weaving the tale! Thank you most kindly, Prof McGonagall!
So, as I alluded to in my response to Martin (Gin110881), you have most astutely hit upon the reason why the dreams keep flitting back A.D. 60 and 1998. Actions and consequences! What I have not yet given you enough clues to determine yet is whether (or how) those Roman era dreams might truly impinge on a present of future reality. As Ginny accurately pointed out, despite dreams to the contrary, Harry *does* still exist. For the time being, anyway...
For the resolution to this little conundrum, I intend to keep you dangling for a while longer, although I never put it past a few readers to ferret out the answers to questions before I've actually given them enough information to resolve. That's part of the fun in the authouring experience!
Anyway, as I mentioned in a review a little while ago, I has diverted part way through writing chapter 6 in order to do due diligence. But I do hope to not leave you clinging by your fingertips for too long!
Reviewer: MollyandArthur Signed Date: 2015.09.05 - 08:38PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Action packed chapter. Hermione is wonderfully written in this story, and I like the way Sirius is portrayed as well. The future Hogwarts scene was thoroughly disturbing. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Great to hear from you again MollyandArthur! I sincerely appreciate your steadfast support!
Gratified that you continue to like the Hermione characterization, even as she proves herself to be imperfect and susceptible to the occasional misjudgment. Glad that you like Sirius as well -- I'll be looking forward to your reaction to how he handles the little bedroom crisis.
And yes, the latest incarnation of the Great Hall scene is, in my own mind, the most appalling of any thus far. It was rather unpleasant to write, but for me, reading the inquisition scene in Deathly Hallows (i.e., Mary Cattermole on trial) was when it truly hit home for me what was at stake in the HP series -- the story was no longer about abstract good vs. evil, but rather portrayed a battle against unconscionable evil. This is a bit of what that scene tries to convey.
Thanks again for your thoughts, M&A!
Reviewer: Gin110881 Signed Date: 2015.09.05 - 04:46PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Its fun to read how Harry and Ginny try to become clear about their feelings. I really enjoy the both of them together. Will they get a chance to talk about each other? The smiling breakfast was brilliant. I hope that Sirius has pushed them in the right direction ...
Aha, the big question -- will they ever talk about 'each other', by which I believe you mean the possibility of something beyond friendship. Well, they are a bit shy about the topic, and perhaps they feel guilty about focusing on something like that when there are other very serious issues to contend with, but... it has to happen!
Although Grimmauld Place politics are rather petty compared to the fate of the wizarding world, they will probably continue to intrude on the lives of our dear friends. Such is the way of this insidious authour.
Prof McGonagall has the right idea when it comes to the question of why Harry is worried that he'll never be born. As to whether the Publican is a father or not, let us say that he has some... explaining to do.
As far as whether or not I can let you on off this cliff before you hit the road, it depends on your planned departure date. Unfortunately I stopped part way through chapter 6 to do a bit of relevant research and to tweak some plot diagrams, so things are a bit behind schedule. But I hope to do some writing today and tomorrow. If I don't get hit with too much real-world stuff, I hope to post by the end of the week.
As always, thank you for your thoughts, Martin!
Reviewer: Dreaming Haven Signed Date: 2015.09.05 - 06:41AM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Yay Sirius! He has been so great helping them out, maybe he'll figure out a way for them to spend the nights together. Hermione's a bit annoying though, helpful but still annoying. She's just a bit too nose, which to me mean you have got her character down great. She always annoyed me a bit in the books as well. As for Ron what a prat! He didn't even notice his best friend crying , he was too busy jumping all over his sister.
Yes, this was Sirius's coming-out chapter, although in this story none of the adults are in any rush to involve themselves in something that (thus far) Harry, Ginny and Hermione have been reluctant to get the adults involved in. In chapter 6, Sirius makes one key statement that will presage the shift in this.
I'm afraid you're completely correct -- this was indeed the chapter in which Hermione's patience was clearly beginning to wear thin. Throughout the books, I think that despite her deep Ravenclaw intellect, Hermione revealed herself (many times over) to be a classic Gryffindor. By this, I mean that despite her law-abiding bookish nature, she certainly wasn't above throwing caution to the wind and acting boldly on issues that she didn't have a full grasp or understanding. The fact that Harry and Ginny are still holding back some details from her (and they have certainly had their just reasons for doing so) is probably exacerbating Hermione's lapses in judgment. The true question of how useful, helpful and supportive Hermione is prepared to be will be answered once Harry and Ginny agree to fully disclose to her the situation. After this last round of dreams, that moment clearly has to come soon.
And then there's Ron. If you have a chance, you can skim my comments to BkRmGrl87 (just below this review) for some thoughts on 'Harry's best mate'. Rowling always loved to dig Ron a big hole to fall into, then watch him slowly and painfully scrabble his way out. There's still plenty of scrabbling left for RBW, I fear.
Great to hear from you -- thank you most kindly for following along, and offering your thoughts, Dreaming Haven!
Reviewer: BkRmGrl87 Signed Date: 2015.09.05 - 01:02AM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Oh, I am loving this story so very much. It is so well written and the plot just keeps getting thicker and thicker! Brilliant. I was initially surprised at Rons explosive response to seeing Harry and Ginny, if Harry was clearly in tears and needing the comfort, but perhaps not after his mulish attitude with Harry having to spend a night alone with Ginny during that first chapter of the story. The Dreams are chilling, especially the last one, but regardless the gravity only makes the story more riviting and exciting. I can't wait for the next chapter, so that we can have the big reveal between Sirius, Hermione, Harry and Ginny! That will be great, but I can t wait for more information about what is happening to the Publican and why there was a man that looked just like Harry! I know you said that the Publican looks very much like our favorite protagonist, but Still, the Mystery there will be interesting to see none-the-less.
Wonderful that you're continuing to enjoy the story, BkRmGrl87! Always pleased to add a thoughtful reader and diligent reviewer, since the back-and-forth almost always makes the story better.
If I was to give Ron a benefit of the doubt, I guess I would admit that a person's judgment is often poorest after having just woken up. Beyond that, things are likely to remain a bit tense and, indeed, ambiguous for a while. Do Ron's actions mean that he's worried about how Molly would react? Is he having the stereotypical 'over-protective' brother fits? Or is he actually becoming jealous over his younger sister monopolizing his best mate? Will the authour ever clear all that up?
Oh, and the mystery of the Potter-like horseman is indeed, as you surmise, very important to the plot...
Reviewer: Wolfs_Scream Signed Date: 2015.09.04 - 09:38PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Heh -- yeah, given his upbringing, much of what "normal" folks take for granted with respect to social interaction would be rather foreign to him.
Yes, I do agree that Hermione over-stepped the bounds of decorum with that one -- a lapse in ethical judgment of the sort that, every once in a while, JKR attributed to Hermione (say, for example, the Confundus charm on Cormac MacLaggen). You'll notice that Ginny took her fury out on the clock itself (and other stuff around the bedroom) so I think she simply didn't realize that it had been tampered with. I agree with you that she's unlikely to have let Hermione off so easily for something like that if she had actually known.
Regarding 'Death Eaters', you are indeed correct to question the disconnect between the British cult and analogous ones in other European cultures. In linguistic theory, many researchers ascribe to the belief that the extent to which phrases are 'similar' in different languages can help to distinguish which culture borrowed a given phrase from which other culture -- a little like the child's game in which one child whispers a sentence to the next, on and on, around a circle. That, in tandem with your obvious observation skills, might give you enough of a clue to start on a path toward one of the bigger mysteries in this story.
Is that infuriatingly vague? ;)
Yes, much in indeed unsettled! I think the story has progressed past the opening third, but we are not yet half-way.
Author's Response: Oh, and you probably saw my PM saying that your note failed? It's no problem if you'd like to post typos in your review comments -- the comment board function on this site is a lot more robust than the message system.
Reviewer: RighT3rantZ Signed Date: 2015.09.04 - 08:56PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
It was very nice of Harry to scramble Hermione's eggs, with some bacon. Really a shame that Ginny didn't come down simultaneously with Hermione to feast. She ended up taking 2 sunny side up instead, with a smile. I am glad you are tending to the nutritional needs of Harry, Ginny, Hermione.... and Remus with Sirius I guess.
Since the breakfast banter motif is likely to persist with the story, I personally think that Harry probably ought to diversify his offerings a bit. I wouldn't expect a fifteen year old male to craft a prize-winning Full English Breakfast, especially for such traditional diets as the Weasleys, but the authour may get a little bored unless he spices it up.
Will Harry need to go back to Hogwarts? Yes, eventually. But will he need to do so in this particular story? I suspect that you may be onto something, since he is certainly getting a lot of useful information from unconventional sources. There is also the issue of the relatively hyperactive timelines I often seem to build into my stories -- we've only eaten up four days in August so far, and now I'm even thinking that the Ministry hearing will have to be pushed back to Chapter 7 since there are so many things that need to happen before then...
My apologies for a stream-of-consciousness response! Thank you again for making those neurons fire!
Reviewer: mdauben Signed Date: 2015.09.04 - 12:06PM Title: A Godson and a Princess
Things get more and more interesting with each chapter! I'm not sure what these dreams mean yet, but I can't help but feel whatever it is, its not good. Can't wait for the next update to find out what they two are going to tell Sirius.
Great to see that you like way it's building! Chapter 6 will resolve a few short-term threads and raise a new long term issue (which may prove to be a 'gotcha' moment for some of the most astute readers), so I do hope that I can continue to foster new and evolving interest.
Oh, and unsurprisingly, I will not keep you waiting long for the conversation with Sirius -- hope you enjoy!
Thank you very much for continuing to follow the story, mdauben! I'm highly appreciative of the thoughtful words!
Reviewer: ginnyweasley777 Signed Date: 2015.09.04 - 11:45AM Title: A Godson and a Princess
wow! fantastic chapter!
Oh wonderful -- I'm most relieved to hear you enjoyed it, since I was obviously (per my preliminary AN) concerned that readers might fret over the dark turn that the dreams took.
Thank you most kindly for supporting the story through reading and in your kind comments! Chapter 6 is underway -- hope to get it posted reasonably soon!