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Reviews For Darkness Within

Reviewer: BrianMcLyr Signed Date: 2016.12.05 - 07:18PM Title: Chapter 4 Sirius Black

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No Review

Author's Response: Thanks!!!



Reviewer: GHL Signed Date: 2016.08.16 - 06:27PM Title: Chapter 4 Sirius Black

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Seems you've settled into the process of crafting consistent, quality chapters!

Nothing negative or constructive to offer this time around, so I'll resort to the "keep up the good work" platitude. Sorry,I'll try to be more creative next time.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! That really means a great deal to me!



Reviewer: Gin110881 Signed Date: 2016.08.11 - 07:20AM Title: Chapter 4 Sirius Black

Yikes, I'm sorry for the stupid question regarding the sequence of the characters. After I cleaned my glasses, I saw that the sequence simply is alphabetically.
But I must confess that Malfoy on top of the list immediately catched my eye and left me wondering. ;-)

Author's Response: Too funny! I didn't notice the names were in alphabetical order. Mysteries of technology indeed!



Reviewer: Gin110881 Signed Date: 2016.08.11 - 05:14AM Title: Chapter 4 Sirius Black

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Ah, another short sighting of Ginny. I hope that we'll see her quite often in this story.
Bill is certainly good for Ginny. However, I fear that the two of them will rarely see each other for the next few years. Hence Ginny needs to make other friends soon.

I'm glad for Neville and Anna that their lives at Longbottom Manor has brightened up considerable. It seems that everyone but Harry has a nice vacation, despite the nightmares of course. I was a wee bit surprised that Anna's father has stopped by and spent a few days with her in Brighton. Previously, he didn’t look like such a family guy to me.

In a reply to another review you said that the story will follow the canon events, except for specific changes. I'm afraid that this also means that Harry will ignore Ginny for a few more years.
I wonder if the order of characters in the header of the story is relevant. Since Malfoy is mentioned first, I assume that he's an important person in the story.

As always, I don’t ask for spoilers, those are just my silly thoughts when I read the story. Many thanks for another great chapter.


Author's Response: You're quite correct that even though Bill is wonderful, Ginny really needs friends at school. I probably have not done the best job of portraying Anna's father. Since her mother died when Anna was three years old, her father has thrown himself into his career. Anna moved into her grandmother's house, and he has not lived with her in a decade. He does love his daughter, but he is a total workaholic and possibly does not know how to interact with her. Malfoy being listed first is just because I clicked on all of the available names of characters for the story, and somehow he ended up where he did. The mysteries of technology! Thank you so much for another thought provoking review!



Reviewer: potterfan2008 Signed Date: 2016.08.09 - 02:54PM Title: Chapter 4 Sirius Black

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I'm glad that we got to see Ginny. Bill is such a wonderful big brother. Is Harry coming into the story anytime soon? I'm glad that Anna is doing well and was able to spend time with her father. I'm hoping Hermione will be too busy taking every elective known to man to interrogate Anna - that could be very off putting for someone is trying to keep secrets - if Anna is sorted into Gryffindor of course. Remus - I think this is the part of him I dislike. He never even considers that Sirius is innocent. Everyone describes how close James and Sirius were - he was James' best man and Harry's godfather. I wonder if Remus is jealous. You'd think he'd at least try to confront Sirius and demand answers. I am enjoying this story, but it seems very far from a Harry/Ginny type story at the moment.

Author's Response: Bill is awesome! He is a great brother and very supportive of Ginny. Harry, as well as other canon characters, will be entering the story very soon, with the start of the school year. Thanks for the review!



Reviewer: Aurorofthelight Signed Date: 2016.08.08 - 04:18PM Title: Chapter 4 Sirius Black

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Nice to see you touch on Ginny on this one! No way Remus could know what is actually going on with Sirius and the only person he's a danger too is Wormtail until later in POA! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Author's Response: Thank you so much! It was nice to have Ginny in this chapter. She will be seen more soon, along with several other familiar characters.



Reviewer: Arnel Signed Date: 2016.08.08 - 12:45PM Title: Chapter 4 Sirius Black

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I really liked this chapter, mostly because you're gradually bringing in the canon characters who are key to the plot of my favorite book. Thank goodness Bill is such a good listener! He's exactly what Ginny needs and while he has reservations about her request for the Silencing Spell, I understand why he's willing to teach her.

Since Neville is growing into a more mature teen, I was glad to see his birthday was such a nice day for him. It seems to me that past birthdays in the Longbottom household have been rather boring, so Neville getting to do many of the things he likes best is a good thing.

As is Anna's dad showing up to spend some time with her. I think he did the right thing by leaving immediately after settling her in at Neville's house because his absence gave her time to adjust to the new adults in her life. However, he wasn't away so long as to make her anxious about his whereabouts or his safety. I'm hoping Andrew will show up one more time, just before school starts; it would be nice for them to have a night or two together before they're separated for a much longer period of time.

Finally, I'm glad Remus is really and truly going to be the Defence teacher and that you've brought up the subject of Sirius. I'm looking forward to this subplot very much. All in all, well done.

Author's Response: Bill is a fabulous big brother! I think he would try to help Ginny in any way he possibly could. Neville is certainly enjoying a far more interesting life at Longbottom Manor with the addition of Anna and Remus. Unfortunately, Andrew will not see Anna again for a while, so I'm glad they had their time together in Brighton. As to Remus being the Defence teacher, I couldn't imagine third year without him! Thank you so much for the wonderful review!



Reviewer: ginnyweasley777 Signed Date: 2016.08.08 - 10:31AM Title: Chapter 4 Sirius Black

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Nice chapter, I liked the insight into Ginny and her asking Bill to teach her a silencing charm :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! Bill is such a great big brother. I think he would want to help Ginny and be willing to teach her.




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