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Smother Me | ||||
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Category: Post-Hogwarts Characters:None Genres: Romance, Songfic Warnings: None Story is Complete Rating: PG-13 Reviews: 5 Summary: During a break from the search for the Horcruxes, Ginny shows up on Harry's doorstep to inform him the Death Eaters have struck again, but this time it's someone close to them. They argue over if being together is the right thing to do. If your heart tells you it is, should you listen? How can Harry defeat the Dark Lord if he doesn't allow himself to love? Songfic to 'Smother Me' by The Used Hitcount: Story Total: 4134 Disclaimer: Harry Potter Publishing Rights © J.K.R. Note the opinions in this story are my own and in no way represent the owners of this site. This story subject to copyright law under transformative use. No compensation is made for this work. Author's Notes: I wrote this while on a school trip, before 'Deathly Hallows' came out |
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Lao Tzu once said, "Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart and the senses." But what if the head and the heart don't agree? This is my first HP fic, so be honest about what you think of this. ------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- ----------------------------------- R ain was drizzling down the cold window pane as it slowly made shapes and tears on the glass. There were few people in the streets as they began to disappear into the various warm shops along the cobblestone roads of Hogsmeade, though most had the sense to Apparate earlier out of the pouring rain. A young man of about 18 stood at the window of his loft apartment as he stared into the storm. His messy licorice colored hair framed his angular face as he rested an elbow on a wooden beam. A pair of circular wire glasses rested on the bridge of his nose and covered two stunning green eyes that could win over anyone who gazed into them. But today they were clouded over with indecision and contemplation. He had been one of those that had Apparated out of the storm, but not before his once warm grey jacket, white shirt, and denim jeans were tinted with the cold of the rain that he was now staring into absentmindedly. He was thinking of her. The only girl that had managed to hold his heart in the palm of her hand, and she was unaware of her power over him. He knew when they were younger, she held a soft spot for him, and never thought she could have him. But over time, the tables had turned, and in a bitter irony, now he was the one that could never have her. Let me be the one who calls you baby All the time Surely you can take some comfort Knowing that you're mine Fate was truly cruel in its spite. He never should have let her go, even if it was for her sake. Ginny Weasley used to be, and still was, his, even if she never wanted him. He had never truly stopped loving her. Suddenly, he heard a soft knocking on his door. No one in their right mind visited him except Ron and Hermione, and they usually dropped by to tell news from the Order, or to inform him on their progress for the Horcruxes. They only had two more to go, the Hufflepuff locket and Voldemort’s snake Nagini, not counting the Dark Lord himself. “Who is it?” he called out, wishing for whoever it was to leave and give him time in his quiet solitude. He strode over to the door without waiting for a response and flung it open. He wasn’t prepared for who greeted him. “Hello Harry.” Ginny said as a lazy grin sprang up on her face. Harry could hardly believe his eyes. Though he had seen her since Bill and Fleur’s wedding, there had been few words between them. They both knew they each harbored deep feelings for the other, but neither could never seem to get things together, with Harry’s stubbornness with his need to distance himself from her for her own safety, and Ginny’s equal stubbornness at him being, in her words, an arrogant stupid prat. Before he could get a word edgewise, Ginny was in his arms and sobbing full force into his shoulder. Just hold me tight, lay by my side And let me be the one who calls you baby All the time As he reveled in the feeling of contentment of her in his arms again, he suddenly realized that she was soaking wet and shivering with a force that was too frequent to be from her crying. “Ginny, come on, you’re freezing…” Harry muttered as he gently ushered into a warm comfy red leather chair. He pulled his wand out of his back pocket and pointed at her and her jeans and sweater instantly dried off, as Dumbledore had done to him in Tom Riddle’s cave so many years ago. “Th-thanks.” She stuttered, rubbing her arms to get rid of the cold. Her flaming red hair had always been a trademark of the Weasley family, but he had thought Ginny’s luxurious curtains of red were astoundingly gorgeous as they framed her delicate freckled face and highlighted her brown eyes. I found my place in the world Could stare at your face For the rest of my days “Why are you here?” He brought himself to ask as he gazed into her red rimmed eyes as she took deep breaths to stifle her sobs. “Harry,” he momentarily savored the sound of his name on her lips. “Harry,” she repeated. “She’s gone.” His insides churned at her words. So she came for a reason… and it was a bad one at that. “Who? Who’s gone?” “Tonks. She disappeared. No one knows where she is or if the Death Eaters got her…” Ginny trailed off into another round of tears without finishing her sentence. Harry knew she had been close to the good natured Auror, and he had taken a liking to Tonks as well, but he wasn’t as devastated at her loss as Ginny was. But yet, another person that had entered his life was gone. He couldn’t help feeling that this was, in a way, his fault, for Tonks had been friends with him, and therefore was on Voldemort and the Death Eater’s list. It always ended like this. Whoever was in league with him would turn up dead or be taken by Death Eaters, and he would shoulder the blame, for they would be safe if only he had never existed. This was exactly why he had left Ginny. It was too dangerous for her to be with him, and as much as it killed him, he had to let her go for her own safety. He did, however, feel an overwhelming sadness at seeing Ginny like this as he looked down at her, and he wanted to do something to help her. As hard as he tried to think of anything to do, Harry just let his instincts take over as he kneeled down and wrapped his arms around Ginny as she cried into his chest. Now I can breathe, turn my insides out And smother me Warm and alive I'm all over you Would you smother me? After what seemed like moments but couldn’t have been less than a half hour, Ginny composed herself and wiped away her tears with the sleeve of her dark green sweater. “I’m sorry for being like this Harry, it’s,” she sniffed “It’s just, I always thought of Tonks as a sister, and now… now she’s gone.” “I know how you feel.” Harry muttered, thinking of how it would feel to lose any of the Weasley’s, with the exception of Percy, and then how he felt when he lost Sirius, who was like a father to him. “I couldn’t bear to watch Professor Lupin take the news.” She said with sadness in her voice. Neither had moved on from calling Lupin Professor during his days at Hogwarts. “He took it really badly; he hasn’t eaten since, and it’s like he’s an empty shell. I don’t want that to happen to us…” Wait, now there’s an us? Harry’s heart lodged itself in his throat. It sounded too good to be true, but then again, nothing was these days… He couldn’t let her do this to them. His jade eyes had a hard determination in them. “Ginny, you know we can’t…” But he was interrupted as Ginny stood up, anger flaring in her cheeks. “I don’t give a damn Harry, I told you this a million times! I’m smart enough to know what I get myself into! Do you honestly think that I would jump into something I wasn’t completely sure about?” Ginny’s eyes shone with fury and stubbornness. “You’re not throwing yourself into danger all for me!” Harry yelled, finally letting out his pent up frustrations. “I can’t let you do that!” “And since when have I ever listened to what people tell me to do? I’m not leaving you alone Harry! You don’t have to be the valiant hero and face everything on his own! There are people here who want to help you! I want to help you; I can be there for you!” Let me be the one who never leaves you all alone I hold my breath and lose the feeling that I'm on my own Hold me too tight stay by my side And let me be the one who calls you baby All the time Suddenly Harry reached out and brought a still fuming Ginny into his arms as her arms were crushed against his chest. Without waiting for her to retaliate, he lowered his lips onto hers. She relaxed almost immediately into his touch, as if she had been expecting this. She started to kiss him back and both were lost in a whirlwind of emotions in the moment. For the rest of my days Now I can breathe, turn my insides out And smother me Warm and alive I'm all over you Would you smother me? When Harry pulled away, he gazed into her captivating eyes. This was when he realized… “I’ve missed this.” He muttered, as he held Ginny to his body and she rested her head on his chest. “I have too.” She muttered, soon followed by, “You stupid prat.” Harry chuckled at her statement, and an overwhelming sadness crept on him. If she had truly missed him as much, or more, than he had missed her, he had made the biggest mistake, perhaps of his life. But still… was this the right thing to do? To follow his heart, not his head? “Ginny,” He muttered. “Hmm?” “Are you sure this is what you want?” She looked up into his jade eyes that were full of indecision, and without hesitating, she answered, “Yes.” With her reassurance, along with his head screaming at him to stop, he laid his forehead on hers and whispered, “I love you.” She made no reply, but leaned up and pressed her soft lips to his. And to think that he had forgotten how this felt… this was pure elation. Her body molded into his like the missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle that wouldn’t have been finished otherwise. "I love you too Harry..." She murmered into the kiss and he felt his heart expand in his chest until his rib cage felt like it was cracking. Ever since he had said good bye to her, he felt that some part of him had died, but he could never figure out where it was until two Christmases ago, when he was playing Quidditch with Ron, Bill, Fred, George, and for a rare occasion, Charlie. As soon as his eyes had seen Ginny, the breath was knocked out of him, but he later found out that was because Fred had knocked a Bludger into his stomach. Still, he couldn’t shake the image of her that day… As they continued their quick, soft, separate kisses, Harry’s mind was reeling. Now I can breathe, turn my insides out And smother me Warm and alive I'm all over you Would you smother me? “Ginny, do you know what this means?” Harry asked her once they broke apart, still fearing that this was the wrong thing to do. “What?” She asked, concern and fear in her voice. “Voldemort will know you’re my weakness. He’ll come after you. And without a doubt, he’ll kill you.” For the first time in her life, Ginny Weasley had nothing to say. “I still don’t think this is the right thing to do, staying with you. If you get taken by Death Eaters, it’ll be my fault, and if you die…” He was cut off as she put a finger to his lips. “If I die by Voldemort’s hands because we were together, then I would die happy.” “Are you sure Ginny? You’d be throwing away you’re life for me.” He said, staring into her deep brown eyes. “Then it’d be a life worth living. I want to be with you Harry, no one else.” She said, hugging him tightly as he wrapped his arms around her. He inhaled her flowery scent as they simply stood there and enjoyed each other’s company. The rain splashed loudly as it hit the window pane, but neither noticed, both encased in the other’s warmth. Let me be the one who calls you baby All the time Harry knew that after today, nothing would be the same. Voldemort would learn of them, he was sure of that. How else could it be described when the Boy Who Lived would protect the Weasley girl with a strength that he did not use with the others in battle? Let me be the one who calls you baby The one who calls you baby But these consequences were petty at the moment, and although things would be more dangerous for both himself and especially Ginny, he would be happier with her at his side than if she wasn’t. A new realization dawned on him and he grinned. After all, didn’t he need love to defeat Voldemort? If love was to overcompensate all evil, his love for Ginny could be his greatest weapon. ----------------------------- ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- ------------------------- Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. — Lao Tzu. |
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