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What We Live For | ||||
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Category: Post-DH/AB Characters:All Genres: Angst, Romance Warnings: None Rating: PG-13 Reviews: 2 Summary: *** The author has been reminded via the e-mail address on file that this story is listed as incomplete and has not been updated in over 2 years *** *** The author has been reminded via the e-mail address on file that this story is listed as incomplete and has not been updated in over 2 years *** “One Generation Passeth Away, Another Generation Cometh” ~ Ecclesiastes * * * * * It had begun to rain, slowly at first, but then harder. Soon Harry was completely drenched and there was no telling where the tears ended and the rain began. He cried for the happiness that Lupin and Tonks should have had. He cried for the generation that had passed away and the children who were robbed of their parents. He cried for his generation; the lost teenagers who had no balm for their soul; no greater purpose to live for. Can Harry find something or someone to give his life a purpose? What does it take to heal a wounded soul and give Harry something to live for? ONE-SHOT. Post-DH. Hitcount: Story Total: 3248 Disclaimer: Harry Potter Publishing Rights © J.K.R. Note the opinions in this story are my own and in no way represent the owners of this site. This story subject to copyright law under transformative use. No compensation is made for this work. Author's Notes: This is my stab at a Post DH One Shot, taking place after Lupin and Tonks's funeral. Please R&R. |
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The funeral was over, but Harry could not move. Everyone was beginning to gather their things and leave, but he was rooted to the spot, staring at the two tombstones, watching them turn a dark grey as the sunlight was obscured by clouds. He had held it in during the service, giving a speech that spoke of Lupin and Tonks’s sacrifice. He had used words such as admirable dedication and love. He had forced the pain down as he told the audience how much Lupin meant to him, as an uncle figure. He had told the audience how Lupin and Tonks loved and were loved by many. Words. They didn’t mean anything; they couldn’t ease the pain he felt. There was nothing that could fill the hole in his heart that was left by the departed Marauders. He never got the chance to say goodbye to any of them; they had just left him. They had fought for him; fought for the good of all goodly folk, and now their were resting in peace. Harry wished he could do something; wished he could have a chance to thank them; wished he could find the words that would heal his spirit. It just wasn’t fair; Tonks had always seemed so alive. She was only twenty-four; she should be watching her child grow, not inside of the earth next to her husband. Lupin had finally found happiness and love, but then he had to join Sirius, James, and Lily. Harry glanced backward, his eyes resting on a one year old with sandy brown hair; a spitting image of his father down to his sapphire eyes. “I’m so sorry, Teddy…” Harry said helplessly, knowing that no words could numb the pain. What could he say to a child that has lost his parents? Harry looked in to Teddy’s eyes and saw a reflection of himself; a boy longing for the impossible; a boy wanting to be held and loved; an orphan. Harry couldn’t hold it in any longer. It had begun to rain, slowly at first, but then harder. Soon Harry was completely drenched and there was no telling where the tears ended and the rain began. He cried for the happiness that Lupin and Tonks should have had. He cried for the generation that had passed away and the children who were robbed of their parents. He cried for his generation; the lost teenagers who had no balm for their soul. Harry closed his eyes and pictured them all: James, Lily, Sirius, Remus, and Tonks. He begged them to come to him as they did before the final battle. He knew they wouldn’t; he wanted them back for selfish reasons. He wanted them to hold of the pain with the sound of their voice. He wanted to escape, even temporarily, from this world where there was only the sound of raindrops colliding with tombstones. It just wasn’t fair; Harry should be the one under the ground, not Lupin and Tonks. He was the one with no home or family; the one who didn’t deserve the happiness. His purpose had been served; why was he here when Teddy’s parents weren’t? They were the ones who had something to live for, not him. Harry’s body wracked with sobs as he squeezed his eyes shut, reliving memories of the Marauder’s finest moments, where they were full of life and happiness. That only made it more painful when he opened his eyes. Harry noticed that Mrs. Weasley was now holding Teddy and leading him away with the rest of the crowd. Harry walked up to her and asked to hold Teddy. Once Teddy was in his arms, he walked slowly towards the graves of Teddy’s parents. “Teddy, let me tell you about your father and mother. They loved you so much Teddy, I know they would have loved to raise you. Moony, your father, was like an uncle to me.” Harry choked back a sob. “Tonks… she loved you and your father so much. They were both wonderful people… brave, smart, dedicated… funny, sometimes. Teddy, I know there is nothing I can do to ever fill the hole in your heart that you will always feel. I just want to say that I will always be there for you.” Harry closed his eyes, failing to prevent fresh tears. He looked at the graves, wishing there was something he could say to Remus and Tonks; wishing there was some promise he could make Teddy’s parents that would let them know that he would do his best to take care of their son. He desperately wanted some divine sign that Remus and Tonks were giving him their blessing to take care of Teddy. There was only the rain. Harry felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around slowly; it was Ginny Weasley. He hadn’t spoke to her since he had returned; he had been too numb. He thought she might reject him and he knew that he couldn’t take another blow to his spirit; it would kill him. He stared into her deep brown eyes and held her hand. He wished he could say something, but he just couldn’t. He thought about all that they had lost and all that they may never have. Fresh tears broke out and he nearly collapsed. Ginny’s arms curled around him as he sagged into her. He tried to say something, but his brain was overrun with pure emotion, as if all of his thoughts were blending into one feeling. She didn’t need to say anything either; she just knew. She wasn’t sure exactly what the two of them shared, but she knew it was something that transcended the typical type of relationship. Before Harry had returned, she wasn’t too sure what she would say to him when he did. It was so painful to be away from him, knowing at any moment he could be lost to her forever. While she never blamed Harry for leaving her, she would be lying if she said that Harry hadn’t nearly destroyed her when he walked away. However, seeing him now, his eyes full of pain, portals to a sundered soul, whatever anger or bitterness she had were quickly washed off by the torrents of rain. All she saw was a man radiating love, but also uttering a silent, desperate prayer to be loved. She had never seen Harry like this; so vulnerable; so desperate. It tugged at her heartstrings and she held on tighter, knowing that in this moment, their maimed hearts were close, beating together as one, drawing their strength from the other. “Harry?” she asked gently, finally able to speak. “Ginny…” “I’ll always be there for you too.” This time she snuggled into him. Harry’s arms circled around her tightly, knowing that any previous disagreements were forgotten. He needed her to be complete. He wasn’t sure how he knew that Ginny had no anger towards him anymore; he just knew that their relationship had changed just now. It was something that could no longer be defined by words such as ‘girlfriend’ or ‘boyfriend’. He felt a connection to her and knew that he would always be there for her, just like he would always be there for Teddy. He picked up Teddy again held the boy in one arm. His other arm circled around Ginny. Right here in his arms he had his life and purpose. Harry and Ginny looked at each other and then looked at Teddy, an unspoken promise being made. Harry looked once again at Lupin and Tonks’s graves. He promised them he would always love Teddy and cherish him as if he was his own blood. He hoped they could hear him through the rain and sky. The rain slowly came to a halt and the sun shined through the grey clouds. The rays of light hit Harry’s eye, smiting the numb depression he felt, and he had his answer. “Look Teddy, that’s a rainbow,” he said, pointing to the arc of colors. Harry looked up once again. He was sure he was imagining it, but he could have sworn that for a second he saw three clouds in the shape of a stag, dog, and wolf. The sunlight was growing, washing over Harry, Ginny, and Teddy. Harry felt his spirit rise as he realized that this was what the departed generation had sacrificed their lives for. Harry nodded to the clouds and slowly walked away, his love for the people in his arms filling him with a divine feeling of purpose. The sound and fury of the war, like a terrible storm, had given way to a new dawn, filled with promise and hope. One generation had passed into the heavens, but they had brought a new generation into this world. He knew now without a doubt that he had something to live for. One adventure was finished, but the next was only just beginning. A/N: I know it’s really short, but I am considering making a sequel, perhaps of the family in a couple years or so. Anyway, please leave a review if you have any comments, this is my first one-shot, so I’d be interested to know what people think. |
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