The second of my Japanese chapters, as I refer to them. This one gets a bit trippy in places and that’s entirely intentional. Elsewhere, I hope to give a small taste of what Harry’s training has really been like. I hope you enjoy it and please, let me know what you think. All reviews will be answered even if it’s just with a thank you.
And talking of thank you’s, a massive one to Tom (MinistryMalcontent) for his extensive knowledge of all things Japanese and his usual wonderful beta work. I’m particularly grateful for him pointing out I had got the words ‘dodging’ and ‘dogging’ mixed up. I know Harry’s in need of some female company in this story but that’s really taking things too far!
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Harry Potter and the Butterfly Effect | ||||||
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Category: Alternate Universe Characters:Harry/Ginny Genres: Action/Adventure Warnings: Death, Disturbing Imagery, Extreme Language, Intimate Sexual Situations, Rape, Spouse/Adult/Child Abuse, Violence/Physical Abuse Story is Complete Rating: R Reviews: 733 Summary: Minor events can have repercussions far beyond their size and importance. When one of these minor events occurs to a ten year-old Harry Potter he finds his world turned upside-down and it starts him down a very different path than the one he expected to follow. Hitcount: Story Total: 199387; Chapter Total: 8115 Awards: View Trophy Room Author's Notes: |
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Deshi = disciple Saturday, 3 February 1996 Gasping for breath, Harry dropped to the cold stone floor. He had been dodging spells for the last fifteen minutes and was nearly ready to collapse. In front of him, Hiroshi Tamazuki stood calmly with his wand at the ready. The Sensei had been launching spells at him at an incredible rate, and Harry knew it was only a matter of time before one of them hit him. He rose to a half-crouch and got ready to throw himself to the left. “Stop!” Tamazuki’s voice caught him by surprise. Never in any of their previous dodging sessions had his master halted unless Harry had been hit. Never the less, with the instant obedience that had been drilled into him since he arrived, he stood and awaited further instructions. “That was very good, Harry,” Tamazuki congratulated him. Harry blinked. Praise from his teacher was as rare as hen’s teeth. “Sit down. I thought we would talk awhile.” Harry sat down cross-legged on the floor. Although it was not unknown for his master to do this, the resulting conversations could be rather unexpected. Previously, they had discussed everything from his childhood to comparative religions. Harry was intrigued as to what today’s discussion would be about. “I have talked with you about many things, Harry,” Tamazuki began, “but I must confess I am concerned. Although in many ways your training is going well, as it stands, you are set to fail in your efforts to become a true Tsuesenshi.” For a second Harry was stunned. Within days of arriving at the camp he had demonstrated his superiority with his wand. Although he had struggled initially with the physical and martial arts training, he was now, thanks largely to Riku’s help, among the top in his group. Why was he failing? As if he had read Harry’s thoughts, Tamazuki walked over and looked him straight in the eye. “You lack…understanding, Harry. You do not know your own heart and you mistrust yourself. If you go into battle in this state you will lose and probably be killed.” Harry could only stare at his master, open-mouthed. “But I…what…” Tamazuki silenced him with a wave of his hand. “See, you do not even know what questions to ask,” Tamazuki said. “Let me give you an example: the death of your adopted grandparents. You have told me in the past you feel guilt at their deaths. If you had never gone to live with them, they would have lived out their lives in peace. Probably true. But tell me, Harry, do you think your grandparents loved you?” “Yes, Sensei" Harry answered without hesitation, “and I loved them.” “Ah, and here we are seeing the most powerful force in the world in action. Tell me, if the situation was reversed, and your grandparents had been taken by this evil wizard rather than you, would you have gone after them?” “Of course,” Harry snapped in frustration, “but they wouldn’t have been in danger in the first place if I wasn’t with them.” Tamazuki shrugged. “Maybe and maybe not. Voldemort may have wanted them to create another Philosopher’s Stone perhaps? But think. These people took you into their home; they adopted you as their own, and when you were in danger, they risked their own lives to save you. Why? Quite simply because they grew to love you. To love someone is a wonderful thing, and if that love is reciprocated then it is a thing beyond description!” Without warning Tamazuki dropped to the floor and sat cross-legged a few feet away from Harry. “But love is a strange beast, my young pupil. Its nature is different for everyone and its effects vary as well. Would I be correct in stating that your grandparents were the first and only people you ever loved?” Very briefly Harry thought about adding Lisa to the list but quickly dismissed it. They had been too young to truly know love, and besides, he had walked away from her without looking back. As much as he liked her, he wasn’t in love with her. “Yes, Sensei, you are correct. I never knew my parents and the rest of my family hated me. The Flamels were the first people to show me any kindness and I loved them for it,” Harry said. “I think we are getting to the root of the problem,” Tamazuki said grimly. “While I have no doubt as to the depth of your feelings for your grandparents, you lack experience in handling your feelings. You have so little else to judge your emotions on, you are becoming confused. To put it plainly, Harry, you do not love yourself.” “I don’t understand,” Harry said. “What has loving myself have to do with anything? What effect would that have on how I feel about anyone else? Besides, it’s a bit egotistical, isn’t it?” Tamazuki sighed. “Foolish boy,” he said in a disappointed voice. “What have I been telling you for months? A Tsuesenshi avoids evil because he is true to his own heart! Never, ever obey a command anyone gives you unless it comes from within you as well. How can you trust your own heart to give you this guidance if you do not love yourself and what you truly are?” A glimmer of understanding sparked with Harry. “So when you say ‘love yourself’, what you are saying is love what you stand for, who you actually are?” Harry asked hesitantly. “In part, certainly,” Tamazuki said, smiling for the first time. “Every human being is an amazing thing! We are the stuff of stars, my pupil, and capable of the most wondrous deeds. I have talked of religion with you previously, but first and foremost remember that every man should be his own church! There is no god other than life itself and life is right here, in front of you.” Harry blinked in surprise at this last statement. “I think the local Vicar in our village may have something to say about that,” he muttered. Tamazuki waived a dismissive hand. “What is the purpose of all religions, Harry?” he asked. Harry just shook his head. “To find enlightenment! The churches of the west seek to do this using an external source; an all-powerful god to show the unenlightened the way to the truth. Here in the east, we believe that enlightenment must come from within ourselves and we meditate to try to reach a higher level of consciousness. But both methods seek the same goal.” Harry was silent as he tried to assimilate these concepts. What exactly was Tamazuki trying to make him understand? “This prophecy that relates to you, it states you will have ‘a power the Dark Lord knows not’, is that correct?” Tamazuki asked. “Yes, but I have no idea what that actually means,” Harry confirmed. “I think I do, and I rather suspect you do as well,” Tamazuki smiled. “Simply, it is love. This Dark Lord of yours knows no love. His heart is hardened and set in its ways. Ultimately, he will always fail because his heart will not tell him the truth. He will seek to dominate and control. He will lash out and destroy in his anger, but in the end he is empty and unable to see the truth in front of him. He is therefore inflexible and unable to change. The tree that does not bend in the face of the storm will be destroyed.” “But if I have this capability for love, Sensei, why am I failing?” Harry asked. “Because you still do not trust your heart. The people you love, your parents and your grandparents, have died. You believe that to give your love to someone is to sign their death warrant.” Understanding broke through and Harry got what his master was saying. He could never have loved Lisa for fear that she would become a target. But by cutting off his feelings he was denying his own heart. How could he know the difference between right and wrong if he ignored his own heart? He hung his head. “Perhaps you begin to understand,” Tamazuki said. “I think I can help you further, Harry. The truth is within all of us, you do not have to search anywhere else for it. But to see the truth you must become nothing. Nothingness itself is the means, the goal and the attainment. Die each moment, so you can greet each new moment anew.” Harry looked blankly at his master. “Drop your Occlumency shields and clear your mind,” Tamazuki instructed him sternly. With a gulp, Harry did as he was instructed. Seconds later he found himself floating in a pitch-black nothingness. He had no sensation of movement although he might have been falling. He couldn’t tell if he was breathing although he might have been drowning. He may have been dreaming although he could have been dead. It was only at this point Harry realised that he didn’t exist, at least not in the form he understood himself to be. He was simply a part of the universe around him, united but separate. He felt no concerns or fears; he was in a perfect state of equilibrium. But gradually he felt himself change. He began to take shape, substance and form. He felt his heart start to beat, unaware that it hadn’t been doing so before. He was warm and comfortable, enjoying a sense of security he had never felt previously. Nirvana. But he continued to grow and he started to feel confined. He hadn’t even been aware of the walls around him. What was that Muggle story? Alice in Wonderland. He was like Alice trapped in the white rabbit’s house. Would he be crushed if he continued to grow? Suddenly, his world was ripped apart and he was thrown into harsh light. It was cold and his senses were assaulted by a million new sensations. He felt fear for the first time, his sense of security having vanished in an instant. He was naked and alone, abandoned and left to die! Then everything was right again. Soft arms cradled him, transferring warmth to his body. He opened his eyes, unaware that they had been closed. He saw a woman of such beauty that it froze his heart. She glowed with a light sheen of sweat but looked incredibly happy, like her greatest dream had just come true. Her long, auburn hair was plastered to her head, but still it took his breath away. Lastly, he looked into her brilliant green eyes and was nearly overwhelmed by the love he saw in them. It was a love that could part oceans, uproot mountains or stop the earth turning. It was a love that could defy death itself. Mother. Harry found himself sprawled out on one of the straw mats that covered the floor of his master’s house. For a second he was uncertain how he got there before his memory returned to him. With shaking hands, he forced himself to sit up and found Tamazuki looking at him expectantly. With a tremor in his voice he addressed his teacher. “I understand, Sensei.” Tamazuki nodded once, stood and left the room. It was some time before Harry found the strength to follow him. Wednesday, 10 April 1996 “First position!” “HURRAH!” Harry yelled in perfect time with his fifteen classmates. His gripped his sword with both hands and thrust it in front of him. “Second position!” “HURRAH!” Harry yelled again and as he swung the blade into a blocking position. At the edge of his vision he could see Riku mirror his own movement. “Third position!” “HURRAH!” He took a step forward and shifted his weight slightly so he was perfectly balanced. His sword was now back directly in front of him, and the evening sunlight reflected off its polished metal. They had been performing sword drills for two hours now, and the sweat dripped down Harry’s body. He was glad that he was stripped to the waist as any clothing he had been wearing would have been soaked by now. The drills were supposed to be a punishment for the indiscretions of one of the younger pupils, but Harry suspected the Sensei would have found a reason to inflict the training on the group no matter what. It was a warm day and the group had all been a bit sluggish during training. The additional drills were a reminder that ‘sluggish’ was not a word that was acceptable in Tamazuki’s school. Harry’s arms and legs ached and he was desperate for a drink. He doubted that the sword-master would stop until one of them collapsed. That was fair enough, but he was damn sure that the person who keeled over wasn’t going to be him. It had been a hard day already. With only three months left at the school, his teachers had been training Harry to start putting all the skills he had learnt together. Less than a week ago he had been allowed to start fighting in the classic manner of the Tsuesenshi, with his wand in his left hand and his Katana in his right. He had spent most of the morning conducting realistic battle training and duelling with his instructors. Spell casting using his offhand had been a skill that he had been forced to work on. He had picked up the basics of wandless casting from his adopted grandfather and had often felt that it would have been easier than doing things this way. The trouble was that wandless casting limited the amount of power you could put into a spell and in combat that was not an option. So Harry had practiced and now he could claim he was ambidextrous when it came to using a wand. The sword felt good in his hand. If he was successful in becoming a Tsuesenshi, on graduation he would be presented with his own blade. A Tsuesenshi’s Katana was an unusual weapon, and normally had mystic characters carved on the blade to provide magical resistance. Not only did it mean the sword could not be summoned by anyone other than its owner, but also that it would be used as a shield of sorts. The greatest swordsmen could use the blade to divert oncoming spells away from them. While Harry had mixed luck with this skill during practice, he was getting better at it. Riku had been rather jealous of his abilities in this area. While everyone was encouraged to develop a fighting style unique to them, one move was a Tsuesenshi trademark: same no ha which translated to mean ‘the shark tooth’. As battlefield tactics go, it was a very simple idea. But like many simple ideas, it was very hard to get right. Simply put, the idea behind the shark tooth was to Apparate behind your enemy and run him through with your sword. But in practice, it was a lot harder to do than it sounded. Firstly, you had to keep your foe pinned down to one spot. This was usually done by firing a volley of spells at them. If one got through and finished off your target, more the better, but generally it kept them on the back-foot and having to maintain a shield spell. You then had to Apparate and arrive facing the opposite direction than you started. This was achieved by twisting further than you would normally, but it was a hard skill to pick up. When you Apparated you had to do so quickly and with as little noise as possible. All in all, the number of people who could perform a good shark tooth was very small. Harry was startled out of his musings by the sight of one of the pupils on the right of the group collapsing. No-one moved a muscle but Harry was certain that everyone gave a collective mental sigh of relief. Sure enough, after their Sensei yelled at them for being weaklings for another five minutes, they were dismissed. A few of the collapsed boy’s friends rushed over to care for him, meaning Harry was free to return to his hut. He looked over at Riku who nodded wearily and they turned and headed to their accommodation. “How much longer are you here for, Harry” Riku asked as they walked. “Until early July,” Harry reminded him. Right at that moment it seemed very far away. “Ha!” his friend laughed. “I will be gone before the end of May. I will think of you when I am home and living in comfort as you continue to suffer here.” “Thank you, my friend. I will continue to think about your sister, as I have been doing for many months,” Harry replied in a deadpan voice. “You are wise to tell me this now, Harry, when I am too tired to kill you,” Riku replied matching his tone. “Yes, well, it was unwise of you to show me that picture of her. She now haunts my dreams.” Harry was nearly successful in suppressing the smirk on his face. “Let me tell you of the dream I had last week of her and I bathing together in the hot springs. She had just removed her kimono and I…” Harry got no further with his story as Riku let out a gasp and made a grab for him. If he had thought about it, Harry would have been amazed he still had the energy to run and laugh at the same time. Friday, 24 May 1996 The gentle sound of the tiny waterfall next to him soothed Harry’s mind. He was sat in the water garden attached to the school, which had become his favourite place to meditate. At that time, the garden was a riot of colour. The cherry-blossom trees were in full bloom making the lower slope a sea of pink, gently rippling in the wind. In non-magical Japan the last of these blooms had faded more than a month before, but here in this magical garden, their beauty endured. Harry opened his eyes and watched a koi carp swim by in the pond. With the breeze cooling his brow, Harry felt as relaxed as he had since arriving in Japan. At that moment his only concern was the imminent departure of his friend Kato Riku. Riku sat across from Harry, with his back against a large rock. They truly looked like brothers now. Their largely outdoor training had given them both a weathered look and a tan. Harry had grown his hair so they both wore it down their backs tied into a ponytail. They also shared the lean, muscular physique of a warrior. Harry looked over at his friend. “So what’s the first thing you’ll do when you get back home then?” he asked. Riku looked a little uncomfortable. “It depends, Harry. I have been away a long time and I do not know what I will find when I return home. I might find myself thrown into combat immediately.” For a second the grim look on his face shifted. “If I have a choice, however, I would like to visit my favourite restaurant with my uncle and eat until I am fit to explode!” Harry laughed. Food portions were always a sore point in the school. Riku looked over at him with a serious expression. “Will you be alright here by yourself, Harry?” he asked. “I’ll only be here another month or so myself,” Harry pointed out. “Besides, Tamazuki Sensei has me so busy these days I doubt I’ll even notice you’re gone.” “You say that now, but wait until you need someone to help you with sword practice,” Riku grinned. They both laughed. It had been some time since Harry had needed his friend's help, but it was still a cause for much joking between them. “How bad do you think it will be when you get home?” Harry asked after a pause. “I do not know. Others stayed to fight while I came here. I do not know how successful they have been,” Riku replied, his face a mask. “I would offer to come and help you,” offered Harry, “but I suspect I’ll have my own problems when I return to Britain.” “We each have our own tasks, my friend. I have a feeling that we are not permitted to help each other fulfil them,” Riku pondered. Harry just nodded sadly. “I will miss you, though,” he told his friend. “I don’t know how I would have got through this year without you.” “And I you, Harry” Riku replied. “I had thought myself capable with a wand, but I was sadly mistaken. If you had not coached me in learning those more difficult spells I would have failed.” “It seems strange to think that in a month's time we’ll be on different sides of the planet,” Harry mused. “Indeed, but distance means nothing. You will still be my brother in everything but blood,” Riku said, smiling. “You know, Harry, we should do something to mark us as brothers. Something that will help us never to forget the bond we have shared!” “Is this another ploy to keep me away from your sister?” Harry grinned before ducking as a small rock was thrown his way. “It is just as well you return to your own country soon,” Riku said shaking his head. “The lack of female company is starting to become an obsession for you. But seriously, we have a few hours to ourselves tomorrow. Let us go down to the village and visit the shop of Imada Ryuji” “Really?” Harry said in a startled voice. “Yes. Why, do you not wish to?” Riku asked. “Well, I never really thought about it. I’m not even sixteen yet; would Imada even let me in the door?” “Harry, you are nearly a Tsuesenshi. Do you really think he would stop you?” Riku grinned. “Okay, if you’re sure,” Harry agreed nervously. “Excellent! We will go to the village after lunch. Remember to bring plenty of money with you. The services Imada offers do not come cheap.” Harry nodded at his friend but in truth he was extremely worried. Was this something he was ready for? Mustering his courage he decided he would accompany Riku tomorrow and just see how things went before committing himself. He knew one thing; he wasn’t going to get much sleep that night. Tuesday, 2 July 1996 After nearly a year’s hard work, judgement day had finally arrived. Harry knelt before his master, Tamazuki Hiroshi, awaiting his decision. If Tamazuki Sensei presented Harry with his own sword, it would signify he was worthy to be called a Tsuesenshi. If, instead, he was given a handful of water rushes, he knew he had failed and was forbidden from using the title. He was knelt on the raised platform in his master’s house, his ceremonial robes pulled down to his waist and his head bowed down. Clearly visible on his chest was his large tattoo of a Hungarian Horntail dragon which he had got during his visit to the local village with Riku. They had originally wanted to get the same design but in the end his friend had wanted a Chinese Fireball which hadn’t appealed to Harry at all. The Horntail had looked the coolest design by far, so he had gone with that. The silence in the hall was oppressive and Harry desperately wanted his master to reach his decision. Instead his Sensei just sat cross-legged across from him unmoving. Time dragged on and Harry became more and more unsettled. After what seemed hours, Tamazuki stood and made his way to the back of the platform. It took all of Harry’s willpower not to turn and watch him. He kept his head bowed and his eyes downcast. “Hold out your hands,” Tamazuki instructed him. Obediently, Harry held out his hands. He felt it before he saw it: the cool lacquered wood of the scabbard placed carefully into his outstretched palms. It took a few seconds for it to register in his mind what the sword meant. He had passed! He was a Tsuesenshi. “Draw the sword,” Tamazuki commanded. Gripping the scabbard in his left hand, Harry wrapped his right hand around the sword's hand grip and pulled. The blade was beautiful. The metal shined and along it were inscribed Japanese characters which were the protective spells cast on it. Now they just needed to be activated. “Stand and let your blade taste blood for the first time,” Tamazuki ordered. Harry stood and extended his left arm. He then lightly ran the razor-sharp blade of the Katana against his skin. He bit down the pain as the length of the sword was covered in his blood. A second later the blade appeared to glow and the blood slowly vanished, as it sunk into the metal. A strange warmth ran up Harry’s right arm. It was a sensation similar to when he had first held his wand. “The blade is now bound to you, Harry Potter,” Tamazuki proclaimed. “The sword will not permit its use by any other and will serve you will as long as it exists. Use it well.” Harry was a little surprised at his master’s words. The way he talked it was almost as if the sword was alive. Although the way the Katana felt in his hand, it might well be, he thought. He returned the sword to its scabbard and tucked it into his belt. He then faced his master and bowed low. “Sensei, I cannot thank you enough for all your help. I have learnt so much here, and I will be sad to leave,” he said. “But leave you must, Harry,” Tamazuki replied. “A year I promised you and a year I have given you. There were times I did not think you would successfully complete the training, so emotionally blocked-up you were. But you have learnt and grown. Your magic is impressive and powerful. You have become skilled in the use of a blade. If required, you can defeat a foe with nothing but your hands and feet. But the greatest thing you have learnt here is to listen to your own heart. For it is a great heart, Harry, and it will serve you well in the dark days ahead.” “Thank you, Sensei,” Harry said simply. “Come, Harry. Let us take tea and we will discuss your return to your native land.” Harry followed Tamazuki to a side chamber where they both sat, and he served tea for his master and himself. As his nerves had been somewhat strained for the last half an hour, Harry was grateful for the strong, hot drink. They finished their tea in silence before Tamazuki put his cup down and addressed him. “Within the next three days you must return home, my young friend. Have you given any thought to what you will do when you get there?” he asked. Harry sighed. “I’ve been putting off thinking about it too much, but I guess I’m going to need help when I get back,” he acknowledged. “I’m completely out of touch with what’s been happening in Britain. I’ll need somewhere to stay as I doubt the Flamels' place will be too secure. And most of all I need allies. This isn’t a battle I can fight alone.” “What you say sounds like wisdom, Harry. No man is an island; try and fight this battle alone and you will be doomed to failure. So what do you intend to do?” Tamazuki asked. Harry stared into his empty tea cup for a moment. He knew what he had to do but that didn’t mean he had to like it. “I guess it’s time I made contact with Albus Dumbledore,” he said reluctantly. |
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