Tensions
While the stress among the fifth and seventh year students increased as O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s neared, anxiety was also increasing in the Wizarding world as the Death Eaters had begun a new campaign of terror. Almost every day, The Daily Prophet would have several stories on Muggles, Muggleborn, or past enemies of Voldemort from the first war being attacked, tortured, raped, and even killed. Houses were being destroyed, and Dark Marks were seen above them, showing that they were not afraid of the authorities. The many atrocities chronicled in The Prophet had a very sobering effect on everyone at Hogwarts, but especially Harry. The stories obviously hit him hard and he tended to much quieter than usual whenever The Prophet reported bad news. He eventually decided to skip breakfast most days so that he wouldn’t have to see the reports and hear all the discussion of it. He also tended to try to be alone more often, stating that he needed to do homework by himself, but Ginny could tell that, instead of studying, he was brooding over the Death Eater activity.
It all came to a head one day at lunch. At breakfast, Adelaide Russell, a second year Ravenclaw, and her older brother, Aiden, a sixth year of the same house, were called to the Headmaster’s office by Professor Flitwick. After they had left, the owls arrived, bearing the news in The Daily Prophet that their parents and ten-year-old sister had been viciously tortured and killed and their house had been burnt down to the ground. This was the first time current students had lost their families since the new series of attacks had started, and this cast a pall over the student body. While the students ate lunch quietly, Adelaide and Aiden came into the Great Hall to say goodbye to their friends before leaving to help with funeral arrangements. As they were leaving the Hall, they walked by the Gryffindor table and Harry stood up to offer his condolences as he had worked with Aiden a few times in Transfiguration class. “I am really sorry to hear about your family. I know what it is like to lose your parents suddenly, and if there is anything I can do to help you out, let me know.”
Aiden’s face contorted in anger at Harry’s comments. “Haven’t you done enough already, Potter?” he spat back at him. “If it weren’t for you, Voldemort wouldn’t even have returned and my family would still be alive! You’re just as much to blame for this as the Death Eaters! And what are you doing about it, you bloody ‘Boy-Who-Lived’? Absolutely nothing! You just sit here where it’s safe while others have to pay the consequences! Bugger off, and don’t ever speak to either of us again!” He pushed Harry aside, put an arm around his sister, who had started crying, and strode out of the Hall.
Harry’s face turned downward as the Russells left and Ginny came over and tried to console him, saying, “He didn’t mean it, Harry. He’s just in shock; he doesn’t know what he is saying.”
She put an arm around his shoulders, but he shrugged it off and muttered, “No, he’s right; it is my fault,” as he left the hall himself.
No one saw Harry for the rest of the day; he skived off his afternoon classes and he also skipped dinner. Ginny was worried about him, but Hermione had advised her to let him have some space. She was unable to sleep because of her anxiety and the emotions she could feel roiling from Harry, so she was sitting up in the common room after midnight when she felt Harry’s presence go past her and then saw the portrait hole open and close on its own. He must be under his Invisibility Cloak, she thought. Where is he going at this hour? She quickly decided to follow him. Using her ability to tell where he was, she was able to stay far enough behind him that he didn’t see her, but close enough that she didn’t lose him. As he approached the front doors in the Entrance Hall, she knew he was planning on leaving so she ran up to the doors and whispered, “Harry! I know you’re there! Take off you cloak and talk to me! What do you think you are doing?”
Harry removed his Invisibility Cloak, revealing himself wearing a heavy cloak and carrying a rucksack.
“So, where do you think you are going?” she asked, hands on her hips.
Harry stifled a laugh. When she shot a furious look at him, he said, “Sorry, you really look like your mom when you stand like that.”
His comment did nothing to quell her anger. “Are you going to answer my question?” she asked, tapping her foot.
Harry looked down. “Russell was right today. It is my fault that his parents are dead because Voldemort used me to regain his body. The prophecy says that I am the only one who can defeat him and I am doing nothing to beat him. I am just staying here while he is torturing and killing at will. I need to do something, so I am leaving to go find him.”
Ginny walked over to him and wagged her finger at him. He took a step backward and bumped into a wall. He leaned against it as she continued to imitate her mother. “Now, listen here, Potter. First, the fact that Riddle is back is NOT your fault and not one of the lives he has taken since then is your fault either. He used you, just like he used me during my first year. You told me that wasn’t my fault and neither is this yours. He is the one at fault, not you.
“Second, while the prophecy says that you are the one who can defeat him, it doesn’t say when. You are not ready to defeat him yet. You are forgetting the other part of the prophecy: you have the ‘power he knows not.’ And what is that power? It’s love and you can’t defeat him without it. If you try to go after him on your own, you are leaving that power behind because I won’t be with you. Without love, without me, you can’t beat him. We haven’t figured how to do that yet, but we are getting closer. Hermione is working hard on finding a way to use the Soul Bond because she loves you too. Ron is trying to come up with some strategy that we can use because he loves you. Luna loves you. Neville loves you. Mum and Dad love you. We all love you, but without that love, you don’t have a chance against him. Sorry to tell you, but you are a just a teenager who didn’t even know he was a wizard a year ago. While your progress has been remarkable, we are talking about the most powerful wizard other than Dumbledore living today.” She grabbed his hands, pleading with her eyes. “Please, Harry, wait until you and I are ready. Think about our dream; we are going to end it, but we are going to end it together, not by you going off on your own.”
Harry averted his eyes, his expression bleak, as he slid down the wall he was leaning against. After several long moments of staring at his knees, he said, “You’re right; I’m not ready. I know that, but what Russell said today really hit me hard.” He finally looked up again and gazed into her eyes as if begging her to understand. “Sometimes I feel so powerless and like I could just collapse underneath the weight of this responsibility. I just want to do something about it.”
Ginny sat down next to him and put her arm around him. “I understand that, Harry, and you are doing something. You are training, getting stronger magically, learning how the Soul Bond affects our magic, but going off without any plan and without me,” she emphasized by pointing at herself, “is not going to get you anywhere and would likely get you killed. Promise me you won’t try to run off without me again?”
Harry paused for a moment before answering. “I promise. I guess I need to control this impulsiveness that seems to be part of my nature.” He opened his arms and pulled her into them, squeezing her. “Ginny, thanks again for bringing me back to rationality. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Ginny chuckled. “You probably would be doing foolhardy things like trying to smuggle dangerous creatures in and out of the school, duelling Malfoy at regular intervals, or maybe even going off into the Forbidden Forest at night. And you would probably be dragging Hermione and Ron into your adventures as well,” she finished with a smirk.
Before he could reply, they froze because they heard Filch’s voice coming from around the corner saying, “Do I hear students out of bed in the middle of the night? Let’s catch them, Mrs Norris.” Harry quickly threw his Cloak over the two of them and not a second too soon as Mrs Norris appeared just as it covered their feet. She sniffed and walked cautiously toward them as if she could sense they were there. She started hissing at them and Filch asked, “Is there something there, my sweet?”
Ginny, trying to think of something to do to avoid detection, spotted a medium sized spider walking nearby, made a quick swish of her wand and it transfigured into a mouse. She then sent a stinging hex at it, causing it to scamper away from them. Mrs Norris noticed the scurrying rodent and chased after it like a shot. Filch muttered, “She must have smelled the mouse,” and chased after her.
After Filch had turned the corner, Harry whispered, “Impressive, Miss Weasley! Nonverbal cross-species Transfiguration. I am tempted to tell McGonagall about this to see if you could earn some house points, but I don’t want to have to explain what we were doing in the halls this late.” He stood up and held out his hand to help her up.
“You’re not the only one who can do powerful magic through the Soul Bond, you know,” she replied smiling as they directed their footsteps back towards the Tower. “We better get back to the dorms before we get caught by someone else.”
**********
Once he followed through on Harry’s suggestion concerning his wand, Neville had also been working very hard. He had already been working out with the Quidditch team in the mornings, but added two to three mornings that he exercised on his own to improve his strength and endurance. But things changed when he purchased his new wand. At first it was difficult, almost like learning magic all over again, but as he practiced, he found that he was indeed a powerful wizard; he took to training with a passion that surprised everyone. Hannah was having some of the concerns about Neville that Harry had warned him about, and did make sure he took some time out for recreational activities, but his single-mindedness was noticed by his friends, and Hannah wasn’t the only one concerned.
“What’s gotten into Neville lately?” asked Ron one day at breakfast. Neville had just come from the Gryffindor Tower, his hair still wet from a shower and his face flushed with exertion. “He’s been working out almost every morning.”
“Have you noticed him in class, too?” asked Hermione. “He is asking more questions, constantly looking for applications for what we are learning. And other than you and Ginny, Harry, I don’t think anyone else in the DA could beat him in a duel. It’s like he is on a mission.”
Harry thought for a moment on how to respond. He knew he couldn’t betray Neville’s trust by telling his friends about Neville’s motivation, but he also felt as if Ron and Hermione deserved an answer. “War changes everyone. You two do remember that he was hurt when the Death Eaters attacked Hogsmeade, don’t you? Perhaps that battle finally opened his eyes, making him realize that he is going to have to fight and not just leave it to the adults. I think he is just more focused than you are used to. I’m sure he’ll be alright.”
Ron and Hermione seemed to accept Harry’s explanation, but he did notice that Hermione seemed to be watching Neville closely over the next several days.
**********
That evening, during DA training, Harry and Neville were sparring without magic. During the spring, Tonks spent several DA sessions teaching hand-to-hand combat techniques that were taught to Aurors, and two seventh years were practising what they had learned. Harry eventually gained the upper hand and sent Neville to the ground. Harry was leaning over to help Neville up, but Neville didn’t stop, and struck suddenly with a hard kick to the inside of Harry’s ankle. Harry’s ankle buckled and everyone in the room heard a loud crack as he fell to the ground, grabbing his ankle. It started swelling immediately, and when he tried to get up, Harry found that he couldn’t put any weight on it. Neville and Ron helped him to hospital wing, with Neville apologizing the whole way. Madam Pomfrey confirmed what Harry had guessed, that he had a fractured ankle.
“Harry, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Neville said after Madam Pomfrey had finished healing the fracture.
“No worries, Neville. I stopped fighting when I shouldn’t have. Remember what Tonks said one of her senior Aurors always emphasized, ‘Constant Vigilance!’”
**********
Molly and Arthur Weasley were just finishing breakfast one Sunday morning when they heard a tapping at the window. Molly arose and opened the window, letting in a beautiful white owl with a letter and small package attached to its leg. The owl held her leg out to Molly, indicating that the letter was for her. Confused as to who would be sending her a package this time of the year, she took them and opened the envelope first.
May 8th, 1998
Dear Molly,
In the States, the second Sunday is the celebration of Mother’s Day. It is customary for children to give their mothers a gift showing their appreciation for all she does for them. A year ago, I made my mom breakfast in bed and gave her a card and some flowers. Looking back, I wished I had done more, to really show her how I felt about her, as it would be the last Mother’s Day we would have together. I don’t want to make that mistake again. I know we haven’t known each other very long, but your love for your children is so apparent in the way you treat them, and their love for you is just as obvious. I want to thank you for the wonderful mother you have been to my best friend and to my wife-to-be. It is because of the way that you raised them that they were able to accept me, befriend me, support me, and love me.
More personally, I want to thank you for the way you embraced me (literally and figuratively) and welcomed me into your family. I am sure it was not easy to accept that your ‘baby girl’ had a serious boyfriend who declared to you that he loved her, but you were happy for her and us. My first Christmas without my parents could have been very challenging to get through, but you and your family helped me through it. My Weasley jumper is one of my favourite Christmas presents ever, because it reminds me both of my mother’s love and yours. The weather is starting to get a little warm to wear it now, but I still do because of the feelings it evokes.
Then, you found out that I was deceiving you, learned who I really was, and that your daughter’s relationship with me was putting you and her in danger. Most people would have at least thought about the risks, but, no, you jumped up immediately and hugged me and even stopped any debate about the safety of your family to keep me in your lives. I am sure it was also not easy to give me your most precious gift, your still underage daughter, but you did, and that is something I will be thankful for the rest of my life.
Because of all this, please accept this small token of thanks for all you have done for me. Every time I see you wearing it, it will remind me of how completely you have accepted me into your family and your heart.
Love,
Your seventh “son”,
Harry
Molly then removed the wrapping from the small present, revealing a velvet covered box. When she opened it, she found a gold lightning bolt charm. With tears traveling down her cheeks, she happily added it to her bracelet.
**********
Everyone was eating breakfast in the Great Hall when the morning owl post arrived. Harry and Ginny did not receive any mail, so they were finishing their meal when they heard a shout of joy from down the table. They looked up from their food and saw Lydia jump up and run toward them, holding the letter up in the air. “Harry! Ginny! I’ve got a place to stay this summer!”
Harry smiled at his honorary little sister. The two had spent a lot of time together over the last term, meeting at least once a week. Sometimes they worked on her flying and Seeker skills, but many times they just talked in an empty classroom or the Room of Requirement. Sometime in February, Lydia had finally confided to Harry what had happened the night her parents had been killed.
“My Gran and Gramps, my mum’s parents, you know, my magical grandparents, came over for dinner, and my parents invited Grandmum and Grandpa, my dad’s parents also. After dinner, I left to stay overnight with one of my old friends from before Hogwarts that lived about ten kilometres outside of the village.
“Amy and I had just started a game of Cluedo when we heard sirens in the distance. We went outside and could see a glow coming from the direction of the village. Her dad told us to put our coats on and he drove us to the village. As we approached, we could see several homes on fire, but the police had established a road block, so we couldn’t get close enough to see anything else. When I tried to run to my house, I was held back by Amy’s dad. It was then I saw a skull and snake in the smoke over the village. When I asked Amy’s dad what it was, he was confused by my question because he couldn’t see anything. It was then I realized that wizards must be involved. Amy’s dad was allowed through the barricade so he could help the villagers fight the fires. We just waited in the car, huddled in the back, hoping for any good news. After about two hours, Amy’s dad returned, his face blackened with soot. He had me get out of the car. He knelt down in front of me. He told me that my house was safe, but everyone in it was dead, my parents and all four of my grandparents.”
Harry was struck by how detached she seemed as she told her story, but remembered that he acted similarly when he talked to people after his parents had been killed. He fought the urge to hold her, as he sensed that she didn’t need comfort just yet, but needed to get the whole story off her chest.
Her head was down, her eyes focused on her hands as she continued, “He took me to my house to let me gather some more of my things, since I would be staying with their family longer than I had originally planned. I stopped at the threshold of the front door, as I didn’t know if I could do it, but I summoned my Gryffindor courage and stepped through the doorway.
“It was obvious they had cleaned up, as my family’s bodies weren’t there and some furniture was missing. I tried not to look around too much as I walked through the living room, but I couldn’t help but notice the small pieces of broken glass and splinters of wood they had missed. I even saw some small flecks of blood on the wall as I climbed the stairs to my room, but none of it seemed real. I felt like I was watching a crime show on the telly, not like it was my house, my family that had been attacked. In a daze, I packed some clothes and such, with some guidance from Amy’s dad. We were leaving and I was just about to the front door when I saw something black on the floor. I knelt down, picked it up, and saw that it was my dog Quinn’s collar. It was stained with blood.
“I looked up at Mr Norton and he shook his head. ‘I’m sorry lass, but Quinn was killed by the bastards too. It looked like he was trying to protect your family when he was struck down.’ He paused before adding, ‘Quinn always was a great guard dog.’
“For some reason, finding his collar broke open the floodgates and I just collapsed to the floor and cried.” She looked up at Harry, tears streaming down her cheeks.
Harry sensed this was the moment that she needed to be held and pulled her onto his lap and rocked her back and forth as she was racked with sobs. After a few minutes she calmed down and Harry conjured a handkerchief for her. She wiped her face and looked up at Harry, embarrassed. “Sorry about that,” she said as she sniffed.
“You have nothing to apologize for,” replied Harry.
“I don’t understand why I didn’t cry for my family, but I did for my dog. Afterwards, I felt horrible, as if I loved Quinn more than my parents.”
Harry shrugged. “Sometimes our feelings just don’t make sense. I remember, a few days after my parents were killed, I thought I was done with the tears. I had made it a whole day without getting even a little bit misty, and, I have to admit, I felt proud that I could be strong and not give into the sadness anymore.
“But, as I was getting ready for bed, I noticed that I was almost out of toothpaste. I was looking at the empty tube in my hand, and thought, Who is going to buy me more toothpaste? And I broke down in tears right there in the bathroom. I went back to my bed, weeping uncontrollably, but also feeling ridiculous that a silly tube of toothpaste caused me to cry again. I knew that I was perfectly capable of buying toothpaste myself, but that was something my mom always did for me.”
He wiped at a tear that was threatening to drip from his own eye. “See what I mean? After almost eight months, the memory of that night still affects me. You never know what is going to set you off.” He sniffed and took a deep breath. “But I can promise you that it does get better with time. I still cry for my parents sometimes, but it happens less and less. Just give it time.”
Lydia gave Harry a hug this time and said, “Thanks, Harry. I know I can get through this, especially with your help.”
Then a few weeks ago, after the incident with the Russells, they had had another difficult conversation.
“Harry, I don’t know what I am going to do this summer,” Lydia said in tears. “I have no family to live with and I don’t have any close friends I can stay with.”
“What about your friend Amy?” asked Harry. “It sounds like you are close.”
“Believe me, I’ve thought about that, and they offered. But, with the war escalating, I’m afraid that I would put them at risk, since I am considered by the Death Eaters a Mudblood. I can’t do that to them,” she sobbed.
Harry held her as she cried. “What about orphanages?”
She shook her head. “I’ve never heard of a Wizarding orphanage,” she replied. “Who would we ask?”
“I think Professor McGonagall is who we should start with,” Harry replied. “I’m sure this has happened before, if not recently, then during the last war.” Harry had walked her to the office of their Head of House and explained to her Lydia’s situation, because she was too upset to talk.
“No, there are no Wizarding orphanages, since most wizards and witches have at least some extended family,” replied the professor when he asked the question. “The British Wizarding community is small enough that most of the major families are related.” She turned to Harry and said, “Even the Potters and Weasleys are related,” she said with a wink.
Harry felt the blood rush from his head as his mouth gaped open. “You mean, Ginny and I are related?” he asked.
Professor McGonagall chuckled. “Don’t you worry, Mr Potter. Yes, you and Miss Weasley are probably thirteenth cousins, eight times removed or something like that. Not close enough that the two of you getting married is a problem.” Harry let out a sigh of relief. “The good news, Miss Forest, is that you probably have relatives through your grandparents whom you are unaware of. We just have to find them.”
“How would we do that?” asked Lydia, her voice filled with hope for the first time that day.
“I will start doing some research for you and see what I can find,” said the professor. “Don’t you worry. I’ll find somewhere for you to stay this summer.”
Lydia asked them to follow her into a deserted classroom so they could talk in privacy. “Who did Professor McGonagall find for you?” asked Harry.
She hesitated before starting. “Before I tell you, I need to explain something. A few days ago, Professor McGonagall told me that she had found a relative, and, as head of my family, he actually would be expected to take me in. She was able to contact him and she asked if he would let me stay with him, and he just replied that he would.” She paused and looked intently at Harry. “The problem is that he had been in some trouble with the law. She reassured me that he was actually innocent of the charges, but was still in hiding from the authorities. He’s not anything like he is portrayed in the press. So, don’t go spare when I tell you who it is.”
“Okay,” said Harry warily.
“It seems that I am second cousins with Sirius Black.” She paused, expecting Harry and Ginny to react, but instead they just chuckled. She looked back and forth between them. “You don’t believe me, do you?” she pouted. “It’s the truth; I am related to Sirius Black!”
Harry and Ginny laughed even harder, making Lydia even angrier. After a few moments, Harry was able to gain control of himself. “Lydia, sorry about that. We do believe you. It’s just that we know all about Sirius and his innocence. Ginny here was the one who figured out that he couldn’t have done what they said he did.”
Ginny added, “You helped put the pieces together, too, Harry.”
Harry shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. Anyway, Sirius is my godfather, and he actually acted as our chaperone over the Easter holiday. I think it’s great that you will get to stay with him this summer. He’s a great guy and you’ll have a great time.”
“What’s Sirius like?” asked Lydia cautiously. She held up the parchment in her hand. “He seems nice enough in the letter he wrote to me, but … I just don’t know. Is it going to be weird spending the summer with a complete stranger?”
“I’m sure it will be a little awkward, especially at first,” encouraged Ginny. “But Sirius is really nice. You’ll definitely like him. He’s lots of fun. Make sure to ask him about some of his shenanigans while he was at Hogwarts with Harry’s parents. Do you remember my twin brothers and the pranks they played?” When Lydia nodded, she added, “Fred and George idolize a group of pranksters called the Marauders and tried to emulate them. Sirius and Harry’s dad were two of the Marauders and some of their hijinks put my brothers to shame,” she said with a grin.
“And we’ll be around a lot, too,” Harry said. “When we were with him over the Easter holiday, we made plans to visit him as often as we could, especially since he can’t go out much. Now we have an additional reason to come visit, to see you, too.”
Lydia let out a sigh of relief. “That will be great.”
“But be careful of his dog, Padfoot,” Ginny said with a cheeky grin. “He needs a firm hand or he will really take advantage of you. If you let him, he’ll want to be petted constantly and try to sit in your lap, even though he is way too big to be a lapdog. Let him know who is boss right away, and you’ll get along fine.” She looked over at Harry, who was trying hard not to laugh, and narrowed her eyes, warning him not to give her prank away.
Harry regained control and added, “Yes, Padfoot is a good dog, although he does seem to favour girls, so I am sure that he will like you.” He looked up at the clock on the wall and said, “We better get off to class; don’t want the professors to take points for tardiness.”
**********
N.E.W.T.s were three days away and the seventh-year students were all tense. Not the least of these was Hermione Granger. She was driving everyone crazy with her revising plans, her insistence at eating as quickly as her boyfriend, Ron, her persistent fear that she was going to forget everything she had learned over the last seven years, and, most of all, her temper that threatened to blow anytime that anyone made a noise louder than a pin drop. One evening she was in the library, sitting at a table piled so high with books that she could hardly be seen. Ron, Harry, Neville, Luna, and Ginny were sitting across the room at their own table, since there was no room for anyone else at Hermione’s. They were all struggling to stay awake as they had all been revising nonstop over the last few days. They were immersed in their revising when they heard a pile of books crash to the ground and then a scream of “NO!!” coming from Hermione. The other Gryffindors stood up in a flash and were by her side in moments and she collapsed into Ron’s arms, sobbing.
Madam Pince came up to them and hissed, “Out, all of you! It is almost closing time anyway. And clean up this mess before you leave.” They all helped Hermione pick up the fallen books, and sorted out which ones stayed in the library and which ones were Hermione’s. They were astounded when only four were the property of Hogwarts.
“How are we going to get all these back to the dorm?” asked Neville.
Hermione came out of her daze to answer, “That’s easy. I put an Undetectable Extension Charm on the inside my rucksack; that’s how I carried them all here.” She started piling all of the books into her bag while she was sniffing and wiping at her tears, causing everyone to gape at her.
“Wicked, Hermione. Sometimes I forget how amazing you are,” said Ron.
As soon as they were out of the library and away from Madam Pince’s disapproving gaze, Ginny asked Hermione, “What happened in there? What upset you so much?”
Hermione sniffed again, and then said, “I had another vision. It’s just too horrible!” before she dove her face into Ron’s chest again.
Ron stroked her hair and said, “Hush, hush, my Hermione. All the other visions came out okay; tell us what you saw.”
“I don’t know how this can come out okay,” said Hermione tremulously.
“What do you mean?” asked Ron.
“I saw Harry die,” whispered Hermione.