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Reviewer: piltad Signed Date: 2008.07.07 - 11:37AM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

Well I do find it hard to believe that Dumbledore will let them get away with really hurting any of his students always seems like he usually knows what is going on though he usually lets it happen anyways just don't know if he would let this one happen.



Reviewer: wave Signed Date: 2008.05.17 - 12:00AM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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Reviewer: brad Signed Date: 2007.10.24 - 08:52PM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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With your stories I've been waiting until the end of each novel and then just leaving a single review - I like to savour good stories and read them properly like that - but, having temporarily stopped my perusal half-way through this chapter after finishing breakfast this morning I find myself still thinking about it, and this story, hours later. So I'll be evil and spend some work-time loading this quick comment. Please don't tell my boss. :-)

It's been a while since I read the preceding books, so I'm rusty on the history of your universe, but I find that I'm really enjoying this novel, the entire 'feel' of it. A Harry who's powerful - good, while I can appreciate Rowling making her series end up as a triumph of an 'everyman' hero, that barely adequate wizard Harry Potter, my personal preference is for the heroes to be at least just a bit above their peers - and furthermore, preparing, no nonsense, for what's coming up. That's an awfully attractive plot.

I'm even more attracted to the idea of his two friends, Ginny and Hermione, standing by his side and supporting him. I'm a H/Hr man when it comes to canon, largely due to my initial attraction to the books by virtue of Hermione's incessant support of and dedication to her best friend. So I love what you're doing there.

I detest canon!Ginny - the way her blank slate character was developed in HBP as a bratty perfect!Ginny, and then her every appearance (luckily few!) in DH displaying some negative aspect of her personality - but I really like what you're doing with her here. I've forgotten your history, but I'm assuming she ended up in Slytherin by virtue of her crush on Harry influencing the hat? Anyway, you've added the *friendship* component to the developing H/G which was so glaringly absent from canon. Actually, your H/G is probably becoming something like my idea of H/Hr, which is why I like it so - a good solid *friendship* flowering into something even better. I know Harry's noted that she's only thirteen - you're doing that very well too, the flashes of adolescent sexual attraction much more believable than chest monsters! - but when the romance deepens I suspect I'll be cheering mightily. The idea of Harry and Ginny being good friends, of a good friendship supporting the ensuing romance, makes it all so much better.

I also like the idea of his two best friends not being scared to admonish and berate Harry for his flaws and shortcomings (like Hermione did in the series, and like Ginny didn't (in at least the Sectumsempra incident)). That's good stuff, and good, *honest* friendship. There's a good core of hard 'realism', if that's the word, that I'm picking up from this novel that I'm really enjoying. I found myself quite involved in this chapter, quite wrapped up in Harry's concern for - and dread of! - his friends' reactions. I liked what I read there very much.

Your work has quite a number of spelling errors, mis-written words and the like. It's not *riddled* with them, not quite enough to subtract from the story, but there does seem to be a high number of such mistakes, sometimes making one stumble in one's perusal. This is a good story you're writing, certainly worthy of getting a beta or two to do a final pass through it? Just my opinion.

Well, as I said, I'm only up to about half-way through this chapter - trying not to read what Harry and Malfoy are doing right above this comment-entry box! - but I can't wait to see how Harry handles the challenges. I laud his thinking of Cedric; pleased to see that his basic nobility hasn't been eroded by his Slytherin environment. Wondering if there'll be as much a need for assistance from the girls as there was in canon, what with his guardian there in the castle already stating that she'll be training/helping him. I look forward to reading on! Cheers.



Reviewer: Fleury Signed Date: 2007.08.12 - 01:55AM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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"...but so were her reservations about the man’s character and agenda."

More proof that Harry's a girl! :P Seriously, though, it'd be cool to explore what Harry would be like if he was a girl.

Honestly, my opinion of Harry, even in canon, has always been low -- so it makes sense that I have a low opinion in this fic. He's acting dangerously overconfident, and that bothers me to no end! I truly detest overconfidence (probably because I have no confidence to speak of). While you've done a great job with Harry's flaws, I believe you've overdone it just a bit. Part of my issue with Harry's overconfidence is that he keeps saying that he's been taken down a few notches... and then goes and puts on airs in front of everyone barely a paragraph later... it's simply not realistic -- or at least not anymore. He's been battling with his ego for a while now, and to tell the truth, I'm fairly sick of the resultant fights with Ginny and Hermione; they accomplish nothing and waste precious space that could be used for more important things.

While I'm on the subject, Hermione needs toughening up. Desperately. She's worried sick about Harry's well-being and gets furious at him for stupid reasons. I mean, sure, she should be angry at his ridiculous outlook on life, but there are other ways for her to express it than yelling. Ginny also needs something. I think she's great, but she's barely an important character yet -- currently, it's like she's a tag-along. You need to do some serious character development there that I think you've been neglecting. That said, I love the relationship you've given Harry and Ginny, even if it is a bit shadowed by Harry and Hermione's friendship. Although I dislike how much Ginny looks up to Harry, I believe it is crucial to their relationship in some way. I don't believe her crush has been eradicated; rather, it has been changed to fit Harry instead of "The Boy Who Lived". Also, Harry's a huge hypocrite for falling for someone who he worked hard to keep from falling for him. That makes it all the better, in my opinion -- because, honestly, everyone is a hypocrite.

I also wish that you would concentrate less on the pureblood-ness, because it detracts from the general plotline a bit (not much, but just a little). I understand it's all very important, but it doesn't seem to be going anywhere soon.

Wow. I turned what was originally supposed to be a nice review into a huge rant. Whoops. Sorry (ish).

So I guess I'll focus on the more positive stuff now. I ♥ Bill, Fred, and George. I'm loving Daphne's little secret, and reading about Remus in the last installment was great. I love what you've done with the werewolves (adding more info on them, etc.) and sincerely hope you put them back into the spotlight later. I also like that Harry & co. have trouble with the Death Eaters and Voldy. What you've portrayed is much more realistic, and as much as I love canon, the war is simply unrealistic at best. I understand that it is primarily a series of children's novels, but it unnerves me that the war is treated much lighter in it. The sixth (and seventh, though to a lesser extent) book changed that a bit, but not enough. I'm glad that you've thrown in the horrors of war. Obviously, I've never seen war, but I'm not naïve enough to ignore what I know of it -- I may not be a soldier, but I have paid attention in history classes; war is not pretty, and you've illustrated that impeccably. Good show :D

On that note, I bid you good night, seeing as it's almost 2:00 AM at the moment. I hope the rest of this fic is as good as the previous installments have been.
-Fleury



Reviewer: drumingod Signed Date: 2007.04.03 - 10:54PM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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Brilliant piece of fan fiction! I love the concept, the differences, and the "new" characters. Keep up the great work!



Reviewer: dakkon13 Signed Date: 2007.03.22 - 11:34AM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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I have now caught up with this series, so now I can give my comments. On the whole, this is a fascinating series. I love the small details you and into the characters. They give your characters that something that you don't see in other stories. Wormtail's love of the sunrise comes to mind. That is a marvelous touch.
Now for my complaints. (Positive reviews might make you feel better, but they don't really help to improve a story). I have two main issues with you overall story. The first is how cold and harsh the story and characters are. Now don't take this wrong. I understand why the characters behave the way you are having them act. I even agree with it for the most part. I don't even think you should change it. I just miss a bit of the love I used to from canon. There is almost none in your story. There is devotion, but not real love. My other issue is Harry's obsession with winning the Dark Purebloods. He keeps mentioning how Dumbledore ignores them and that is a mistake. The problem is Harry seems to be going to the other extreme. Focusing solely on the Purebloods to the point of driving away everyone else. Again, I can understand why he is acting this way, but I can't see this as anything but a mistake on his part.
Oh, one last thing. Harry and Hermione see each other as brother and sister. We got it.
I don't know if this is coming across as a good review. I intend it as such. I do like your story. I even intend to reread it when it finishes. That's about as good of a comment I can give any story. Please update soon.
ben



Reviewer: CruciareMors Anonymous Date: 2007.03.12 - 12:48PM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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I was most surprised to find out you had updated and I hadn't noticed.
I liked the chapter very much, I have to say it. The initial conversation between Harry and Daphne was partly unexpected to me, especially the part regarding Cedric. I honestly thought Harry would not think of him, at least not straightaway, that is.
I found it most surprising that none of Harry's friends proved unconvinceable (does that word exist?) that he hadn't entered himself in the Tournament, and that includes Hagrid. I was certain that at least one of them would only come to believe in him when something really bad happened. Oh well, I was wrong.
I'm looking forward to that Harry versus Draco scene. That's a promising threat looming in the air. Very nice verbal match, by the way. Perhaps Harry's in for a nasty surprise... or perhaps not. Only you know.
Till the next chapter, my very best wishes.



Reviewer: hjp74 Signed Date: 2007.03.09 - 01:28PM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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good chapter although i was a bit surprised that hermione & ginny didn`t even think that some wants him in the tourniment in the hopes that he might die oh well as there both pretty smart hopefully that will come up after the first task.

wow that could be a fun fight a Bellatrix daphen dual & it was nice to see ron put his foot in it again & it can only be a matter of time before ginny lose her sense of self control & hexs her brother into the hospital wing & then we see just how accepting her family is of her as a slytherine & harrys friend.

well harry draco rivialre certanly incresed the tension in the slytherine house i suspect the confontation still some way of but when it comes it going to be fun to read. now it just remains to be sean how hermione & ginny react though i suspect ginny will be slightly eseire on him.

James



Reviewer: _kb_ Signed Date: 2007.03.08 - 10:56PM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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I love where you're taking this with the showdown between Harry and Draco. Unfortunately, I'm sure it will be many chapters before we get there. Oh well, I guess it will keep me reading. :-) KUTGW...



Reviewer: stnssydny Anonymous Date: 2007.03.08 - 10:13PM Title: Chapter 8: Dragon's Teeth

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I have read some of your chapters from all of your stories and I must say that I like what you have written. I will go back and read all of your chapters so that I can understand what you have written. With regards to ferrit face i trust that you will allow Harry to take him down once and for all. Another thing that I would like to see is that you make Harry a prefect over Malfoy. By doing that it will really annoy Malfoy. Also it will give respect for Harry in Slytherin house as well. Keep up the good work and I look forward to more chapters. Until next time,

stnssydny

p.s i trust that Harry will be taking Ginny to the Yule Ball as well.




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