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Reviewer: Dad Signed Date: 2009.06.21 - 07:00AM Title: Harry and the Trunk
I have read trunk stories before, but that was amongst the best. Well done.
Author's Response: Thanks! I do think it's one of the better ones out of my fics, a couple of which were failed platforms for experimentation X(
Reviewer: FirePhoenix86 Signed Date: 2009.03.21 - 04:11AM Title: Harry and the Trunk
I would have loved to see everyone's reaction to their return after 2 weeks. and fred and George's reaction to being locked in a Death eater holding compartment...and what H/R/Hr did about the summoning thing and the smelling thing. Otherwise it was a good story.
Reviewer: Jim McGuffin Signed Date: 2007.07.14 - 04:15AM Title: Harry and the Trunk
Judged for competition.
This was a rather enjoyable story. For starters, it's funny how Harry and the goblins conspire to hide all of Harry's assets from the Ministry, leaving only a single Knut and the "Suckers!" note. LOL! That's one way to fool the Ministry!
Then we have the buying of the trunk, with that West bloke having a crush on Hermione -- much to Ron's annoyance, naturally. LOL! Thank goodness that Smithson was there, or otherwise West would have charged Harry so much money that he really would've been down to his last Knut.
Most of the challenge entries have the Weasleys be the ones to search for the Trio, and this one is of course no exception. But this one's the first in which the twins make an active attempt -- by setting off the Dungbombs -- to force the Trio to reveal themselves.
I've noticed that a few of your earlier reviewers have criticized you for your lack of Harry/Ginny until the part you label as "Epilogue." But still, the validators accepted this fic -- and what's good enough for the validators is good enough for me. Besides, I myself have written previous challenge entries in which Ginny doesn't appear until the very end.
Overall, good job. I wish you luck in the challenge.
Reviewer: billybob Signed Date: 2007.07.13 - 11:49PM Title: Harry and the Trunk
Read for Judging: I’ll start with the CON's because there are so few of them, and there nick-picking anyway. One, no one in cannon, not even Dumbledore ever apparated into number # 4, my guess is something to do with the blood protection…Yeah-yeah - minor detail – I know. Second, your start 2 days after Harry’s BD a paragraph down its 3 weeks before BD which is it. Finally - Three, the trio flooed into the ‘Leaky Cauldron,’ from where exactly? Dursleys aren’t hooked up…are they? Okay the pain is over now the good stuff the PRO's: (1) HG nagging Harry right fro the off…classic, (2).Lack of proper food at number # 4 nice bit of cannon – well done. RW being ignored by HP and HG over truck suggestion, well you got that in one! (3) And my favorite, HG reaction to leering-randy clerk – absobloodylutly priceless… Four stars a knife and a fork - 6.5 from the French judge … but you know how they are. Oh the Gred and forge hunt bacon dung-bombs was a nice touch.
Author's Response: Thanks for your review.
1) Yeah, blood-protection. Gives me a loophole for nigh-anything.
2) Yep, that one. I'm waiting for the prize-giving (I think it's unfair to change it before they give the prizes) before changing it. What can I say? People make mistakes, and my beta was 1 of the judges and couldn't help...
3) You'll remember Mr. Weasley secretly hooked up Number 4's Floo in GoF
Reviewer: sugarquill112 Signed Date: 2007.07.13 - 01:36AM Title: Harry and the Trunk
Read for judging purposes.
Good story. I'm a big fan of the twins and I liked how you included them in your story. I loved the part about the Defense Mechanism Panel. Overall it was an enjoyable read. Good luck!
Author's Response: Thank you for your review.
Ah, the Defense Mechanism Panel. Don't we all wish we had something like that in our houses? ^_^
Cheers!
Reviewer: ginny4everandalways Signed Date: 2007.07.12 - 07:02PM Title: Harry and the Trunk
As a judge of the challenge, I loved the story, it was an OVERALL great story and with a minor tweaking can be one of the greatest I've read. The first time Ron was summoned, I was a little confused but I still loved the story!
Author's Response: Thank you for your review.
Yeah, I know, poor Ron is great comic material, ain't he? ^_^
Cheers!
Reviewer: Katastrophe Signed Date: 2007.07.07 - 04:51AM Title: Harry and the Trunk
Judging for the Challenge
There was some confusion with your timeline. In one paragraph, it states that it is 2 days past Harry's birthday...A few paragraphs later, it say that he has 3 weeks before he turns 17. That caused for a bit of confusion.
Other than that, very nicely written. The apparate feature was very original!
Best of luck in the competition!
~Michelle~
Author's Response: AAAAAAAAARGH!
DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN...
Thanks for your review!
~Ian~
P.S. I think you know I'm smashed at the timeline mistake. Please forgive me.
DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN...
Reviewer: Chreechree Signed Date: 2007.07.06 - 03:07AM Title: Harry and the Trunk
Judged for Challenge: This was a very good entry. I thought you evoked a whimsy, especially at the very beginning of the story, that was quite charming. My favorite feature was the Death Eater holding cell. Seems logical, and it is appropriate that they were discovered before it was all over so that we could see it put to use. Poor twins. I was also glad to see that Harry had the foresight to protect his assets. While I don’t think the Ministry at this point would try to freeze Harry’s assets, they don’t know how long the hunt will take and just what might happen in the interim or how ridiculous the Ministry might become. Prudent to take such precautions. The idea of Harry leaving them that note gave me a good laugh. Well done. Good luck with the challenge.
Author's Response: Which whimsy would that be? And yeah, I'd really love to see the Ministry's collective face when they see...
SUCKERZ!
Reviewer: Merlani Signed Date: 2007.07.05 - 10:00PM Title: Harry and the Trunk
Read for judging purposes.
Author's Response: Thanks mate!
Reviewer: Spenser Hemmingway Signed Date: 2007.07.04 - 09:41AM Title: Harry and the Trunk
I have to compliment you on how through you were with both the trunk’s construction, and Harry and friend’s preparations. The way that the group had to put up with the search was great, especially when the twins found the wrong key. The only criticism that may arise is simply that Ginny appears in just a few sentences. Regardless, I really enjoyed it and I like the way that you painted the picture for us. Thanks. Eric B.
Author's Response: Thank you very much. Ginny? Yeah, what can I say? You can't have everything, and I have very good reasons for not putting in more of a H/G subplot.
Thanks. The Kid.
Reviewer: GINNY__POTTER258 Signed Date: 2007.07.04 - 05:56AM Title: Harry and the Trunk
Judged for challenge:
No. 4, Privet Drive, Canada
Little Whinging, at home
Surrey. The basement...
3:30am. 3:44 am
congrats on a lovely story! my favorite technique was fred and george's bacon scents....it's so like them....i only wish that would have been longer! but other than that their are only a few minor mistakes...so apparently you can still hold up without me beta-ing for you...*tear* alright so on with the minor corrections....
“And as soon as we’re done, you’re taking a wholesome, healthy breakfast,” said Hermione tartly." i think you meant to have hermione say 'eating' instead of 'taking'...
"parchment, Self-Inking quills, and a magical pup-tent." is this one supposed to be 'magical pop-up-tent'?
“But other than making several trips to and fro the Burrow," you forgot the 'm' in 'from'...when did they pick up their stuff from the shop anyhow?
“Apparate the trunk away, you crazy?!” should have been 'are you crazy'..why not just use the portkey button?
he-he i also quite enjoyed the accio-ing! i fell like i'm forgeting something about the story that i wanted to tell you so if i think of it i'll message it to you...hmmm...well i guess i'll go to bed now....one guess what i listen to to fall asleep...oh right the ending seemed a little rushed i'd have liked the return to the shop for the anti-accio charms and sent proof trunk charm...as well as the horcrux hunt itself...i'll have to talk to you about making a sequel now won't i? any how i've already forgotten what i've written so i'm gonna go to sleep now...great story...i think it's you're best yet! : )
Jess
FYI: you once again gave me credit twice only this time it was for nothing i didn't even beta it.... he-he sweet!
: )
Reviewer: Sir Ollivander Signed Date: 2007.06.29 - 08:55PM Title: Harry and the Trunk
Edited for correct Challenge category.
Author's Response: Thank you very much. I admit I was rushing the uploading process. Thank you for caring.
Ian
