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SIYE Time:13:25 on 16th June 2021

Reviews For The White Rose

Reviewer: ProfessorBinns79 Signed Date: 2011.11.08 - 12:55AM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

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OK, first the good news: This is an extremely well-written story! Like all the other reviewers, I think your characterizations are spot on, even Molly when she's a little bit mean about Harry's job. It is also a rather interesting plot idea, and the tone of the piece matches its content perfectly.

Now, for the bad news: My only critique is that the mystery is too easy to solve. I really can't believe those reviewers who maintain uncertainty about who it is. Unless you're being intentionally misleading (in which case you've given too much misleading evidence and not enough actual evidence to be believable), I knew the killer had to be Marietta Edgecomb before Cho's body hit the ground in chapter one. Given the victim list, the facial damage, and the fact that the first victims are all Ravenclaws, it's really unbelievable that Harry hasn't solved it yet (or at least, if the evidence is misleading, that he hasn't made Marietta his top suspect). I mean, he is now Head Auror with over 20 years experience, not some rookie gumshoe!

I don't mean to be wholly negative. I love all of your stories, including the writing in this one. The idea of Marietta getting revenge on the former DA members is a good one. It's just that, in this story, she's practically screaming, "Hey! It's me! I'm the killer!"

I'm glad that you say that this story is going to be a short novella as it would be hard for me to keep reading a mystery that I've already figured out for 20 chapters. Hopefully, after this you might get back to Dementors' Bane! (hint.hint)

(If it is someone else -- and you write it believably -- boy, am I going to have egg on my face! :) The only thing that gives me pause is that it seems the killer was male in St. Margaret's vignette!)

Author's Response: I'm going to just say thanks for reviewing here, and PM you. Too many items to deal with here. - M -



Reviewer: dseay Signed Date: 2011.10.17 - 03:01PM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

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So excited to finally see a new chapter to this story. Now the suspense is going to kill me to see if Ginny is the next target. Love it! Looking forward to the next update.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you're enjoying it. - M -



Reviewer: Dad Signed Date: 2011.10.17 - 12:09PM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

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Cannot wait for chapter four. Will have seriously bitten nails.

Author's Response: Don't take'em down to the nub! Chapter four is underway. Hopefully I'll finish it soon. Thanks for reading and reviewing! - M -



Reviewer: Daetor Signed Date: 2011.10.16 - 07:15PM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

I've been following this story for a while now... and I really have only a couple of things to wonder about, when it comes to this chapter specifically. One... Is the house Unplottable, or under a Fidelius? I imagine it's the former... otherwise, the killer would have never gotten through the wards unless Ginny was not only the Secret Keeper, but the killer had skin contact with her... The second thing is... Wouldn't Harry have wards that worked specifically against Animagi? I mean, after Wormtail and Rita Skeeter, I'm pretty sure that he'd take precautions against that sort of thing... and if there are spells that can reveal an animagus, you could conceivably make a ward that catches any with ill intent an prevent access, potentially even forcing them back in human form.

Speaking of wards against ill intent... wouldn't they have something like that around the house anyway? I mean... I can see Harry warding his home as well if not better than Grimauld Place...

Still, it's your story... I just don't think that it would be that easy to gain access to the Potter's house...

Author's Response: I'll be honest, you've put way more thought into this than I did. I simply tried to piece together something that was plausible. I needed away for the killer to be able to find the Potter's home. I really wasn't interested in detailing the mechanics of the wards. To me that is not the interesting part of the story. I do go into some detail later in the story, but that's not been posted yet. Thanks for reading and reviewing! - M -



Reviewer: Mirry Signed Date: 2011.10.16 - 06:35PM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

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I read this chapter earlier but there was no review thing so I couldn't review and couldn't figure out what the problem was. I had forgotten to log in (oops?).

Great chapter!

I can't believe Molly said that, but I'm not surprised. She would be more paranoid with Fred gone now than before and Harry having such a job would be hard on her. But to be fair, Harry would have probably been hurt regardless of what job he had this time.

Oh no, why is the fly following Molly? That's not exactly comforting!

Hopefully nothing happens to Ginny (or maybe something does, but minor, who knows?) I can't wait to see what happens next and update when you get the chance :D

Author's Response: I'm glad you made the effort to come back again and review. Thanks for doing that. I imagine Molly would be more uptight given what happened to Fred, the form of her boggart and Harry's dangerous job. I'm sure if you think about it, you know why the fly followed Molly. As for Ginny - If you've read St. Margaret's vignette, then you know what happens to her. Thanks for reading and reviewing! - M -



Reviewer: skiutahnum1 Signed Date: 2011.10.16 - 06:34PM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

I know Ginny is pissed at Molly but does marennets really need to kill her....then again knowing Molly as we all do she will not go down with out a fight...kutgw

Author's Response: Molly is not dead yet. She's not even been attacked. Remember, the killer has a very specific hit list. Thanks for reading and reviewing. - M -



Reviewer: potterfan2008 Signed Date: 2011.10.16 - 01:34PM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

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Glad to see a new chapter! So the boys are okay, but Ginny not so much. I'm surprise just being carried through the protections would be enough to negate them. Can't wait to see what happens next.

Author's Response: The boys are okay, and actually so was Ginny at the end of that chapter. As for the next chapter...well if you've read the vignette then you know that answer. The wards - I can see this is going to be a reoccuring question. See the reply to the first reviewer. I do deal with that in an upcoming chapter. Thanks for reading and reviewing! - M -



Reviewer: HGRHfan35 Signed Date: 2011.10.16 - 01:14PM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

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Wow, wait. Is she going after Molly? No, of course not. Molly was not part of the DA although 4 of her kids were. She now knows where the Potters live and she can attack whenever she wants.

And what a great invention you thought up with that Pill. Devious but really good but then again.......you have had a YEAR to think on it! LOL!

Still think it is Marietta Edgecombe. Her own betrayel of Harry & the DA gave her those gross pustels in her face spelling out what she was and although the DA did not, technically disfigure her, she, as a deranged killer is not logical but in her own mind. Typical narcissistic behaviour.....yes Mike, I am a HUGE Criminal Minds fan! :D But we will wait and see in time.

I did really miss you & your writing. Hope you and your Family are in good health and doing well?
Hugs. C

Author's Response: Hi Collinda: As to your guess as to what the killer is doing, you're right on track. I as to the identity...I can neither confirm nor deny your guess. I know it's been a while, but my life has been a bit hectic this past year. It's all been mostly good, but hectic. Hope all is well with you and your family! Thanks for reviewing! - M -



Reviewer: r3in9 Signed Date: 2011.10.16 - 10:58AM Title: Chapter 3 - It Will Have No Choice But To Wither And Die.

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Oh no, no. Don't kill Molly! You're not gonna kill Molly, are you? I'm gonna hate you for that! Love the chapter. But you're scaring me with that fly following Molly.
I wonder why the wards never work for an animagus or detect dangers.

Author's Response: You might want to (A) reread the first two chapters, the killer has a very specific hit list. Or (B) wait until the next chapter before you decide to be cross with me. :) I don't really get into how the Wards actually work as it really isn't an aspect I wanted to deal with. I would imagine several possibilities though - the mostly likely being that the Wards are developed for specific, predictable dangers. Georges invention wasn't a predictable danger. Additionally, the lacewingfly/killer was actually riding on Ginny who is exempt from the Wards. Huh! Maybe I did consider it. That explanation, or one similar to it is in an upcoming chapter, so nice segue. Thanks for reading and reviewing! - M -



Reviewer: Mirry Signed Date: 2011.10.03 - 11:34PM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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Oh no... are Ron and George dead? Oh my... Now I'm going to be all worried until you update again.

me? I'm trying to think about who we know that has those initials in the HP world, unless this is an OC character? At first, I suspected Luna (that would be pretty funny, but highly OOC) because she would be the perfect person to want revenge against a bunch of Ravenclaws because of them teasing her.

I'm loving the Harry/Ginny moments and liking how you manage to put those in while also adding some of the plot line to the story!

Update soon please :)

Author's Response: I can honestly say the killer is NOT OC (It's also not Luna - see St Margaret's story, which was the inspiration for this one, for confirmation). I will be updating soon. I've finished the next chapter and my Beta's have given it back to me, I just need to make the corrections and post. I hope that will be soon, but I can't say for sure when. Real life has been a real pain lately. I'm glad you're enjoying the story so far! - M -



Reviewer: jmpnjimbob Signed Date: 2010.11.16 - 03:04PM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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A cliffhanger?!?! Really?!? That's just mean Mike.

A disembodied hand that quits moving . . . I refuse to believe that you've killed off George, Ron and Harry! Then again you've killed off quite a few characters already and I'd also be willing to bet that we'll lose a few more before you're through.

You've really got a great story going here. I can't wait for the next chapter. I sure hope you don't keep this mean streak going and make us wait too long . . . . .

Mean . . . . mean . . . . mean . . . . grumble . . . . grumble . . . . grumble . . . .

Author's Response: LOL! I've been a bit indiscriminate, haven't I? Killing all those lovely witches (and Michael Corner too). Kill George, Ron, and Harry though? I'm not quite that heartless. Plus, think of all the death threats and hate mail 'd get. There won't be much more in the way of killings as this is only meant to be a short story/novella length piece. But there are still 2-3 chapters left (two long or three short - can't decide yet), and the meanness is quite done yet - I've got a few surprises in store. I'm working on three now. I've had trouble finding time to write (fiction that is - been doing plenty of work for grants). I got a large section written the other night, so hopefully it won't be too long. Good to hear from you Bob! Hope all is well with you. - Mike



Reviewer: anotherdestinyinc Signed Date: 2010.10.13 - 02:38AM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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What?!!! I waited this long for a new chapter and you leave me with this cliffhanger? Evil! Absolutely evil!!

But apart from your horrible cliffhanger, I was very impressed with this chapter. Kept the story interesting and revealed enough to keep the story moving but not enough to give away any secrets. All I have to say is it better not be so long before another update. I'll die from suspence!

Author's Response: LOL! Nothing like a good cliffhanger to stir up a pot of trouble. It's the first time I've tried to write a murder mystery. There's a certain formula for writing them, but the author still needs to figure out how not to make it seem formula driven, so it's nice to here your comments on pacing. I apologize for the length of time in between. Between work, things to do at home, and my son's active schedule, finding time to write is difficult. Late nights are what I'm usually left with (if I'm not too tired to write). I'm already about halfway through chapter three. Once I'm done, it goes to St Margarets for her input and approval, then on to my betas cwarbeck and Spenser Hemmingway. As you can see it becomes quite a process, but one that I feel is necessary to turn out a good story. Hang in there, I'll do my best to get this next chapter in sooner, Thanks for the review! - Mike



Reviewer: deedeevee Signed Date: 2010.10.12 - 10:12PM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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The plot still thickens. Glad to see your update and it was another great chapter. I'm looking forward to more!

Author's Response: Thanks! The plot does thicken. More intrigue to come in the next chapter. Thanks for the review! - Mike



Reviewer: Birlan Signed Date: 2010.10.12 - 07:55PM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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wow--you've killed ron, harry and george. I'm shocked. I really didn't expect the story to end there but I guess it did.

:-)

Author's Response: You're the second person who thought I ended the story. Who said the story ended? There's still several chapters to go. And I wouldn't write anyone off just yet until you see the beginning of the next chapter (not that I'm not above that - see Cho and Michael - ). Stay tuned for chapter three. Thanks for the review! - M



Reviewer: GinnySavesHarry1998 Signed Date: 2010.10.12 - 03:49PM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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Cliffhangers are mean. :-P

I'm bettig te killer is Marietta Edgecombe. "me" and she was disfigured from Hermione's curse from the DA contract.

Author's Response: LOL! St. Margarets said it was cruel, I've gotten an evil as well (insert maniacal author laugh here). Don't go spending all your winnings in one place, and for Pete's sake don't shout that guess out from the top of your roof. Thanks for the review! - M



Reviewer: sanidad Signed Date: 2010.10.12 - 11:14AM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

Very nice chapter. Can definitely feel like you're starting to build up some momentum. Looking forward to the next one!

Author's Response: Thanks Rich! My first attempt at writing a murder mystery story. Even though there's a formula to the genera, it's still not easy to do and not have the story come out canned. Glad you're enjoying it, and thanks for the review! - Mike



Reviewer: kathymom Signed Date: 2010.10.12 - 12:55AM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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AWESOME second chapter to this story ! As usual, perfect characterizations and dialogue, just fabulous writing ! While reading the reviews, it just hit me who the killer could be, but, no - it can't be. I thought he was dead...or is he ? Anyway, looking so forward to the next installment ! You are one terrific writer !

Author's Response: Thanks for the nice compliments! You thought he was dead? Clearly not. Now for the real brain buster - he's not the murderer. (Author laughs manically at puzzled readers confusion.) Hopefully what ever hit you didn't hurt to bad, because you're going to have to come up with a different suspect. :D I'm glad you're enjoying the story. Thanks for the review! - Mike



Reviewer: crisis Signed Date: 2010.10.11 - 06:01PM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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Holy crap this is already an amazing story! Not only is Harry an auror, but it's a murder mystery. You are a very talented writer as well and I can't wait for the next chapter.

Author's Response: Holy crap? LOL! I sometimes wonder if John Crap, the inventor of the modern toilet, ever new what became of his name. Thanks for the high praise. I appreciate it. - M



Reviewer: sidnandragin Signed Date: 2010.10.11 - 12:59PM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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I am so loving this story. I am on the edge of my seat and banging my head trying to figure out who the character could be. ME, I too thought of Cho's friend but then I thought, why would she? Cho stood by her friend so why kill Cho?

I have to go back to the old board....

Could the letters be reversed? Ernie Maximillian?

hmmmmm... O, the third person, I do hope it isnt Katie......

Author's Response: Katie? Hmmm...I think you missed something. If you look at the last three scenes more carefully, I think you'll find the third person is Harry. As for ME...It could be Cho's friend Marrietta. Cho stood by her at first, but then later ditched her, if I'm remembering correctly, so I don't think you can rule her out just yet. I think the Ernie you mean is Ernie MacMillan. What a coincidence that his initials are EM, but of course, that's not ME, sorry. At any rate, I'm glad you're enjoying the story, because that's what matters most to me. Thanks for the review. - M



Reviewer: sweetdreamer285 Signed Date: 2010.10.10 - 09:42PM Title: Chapter 2 - When Ive Plucked This Rose...

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Ohhh the wait was very worth it ^j^

It's good to feel expecation of a good story again!

Author's Response: Thanks! I glad you're enjoying it. I know what you mean about the expectation of a good story. There's just something about a good piece of fiction and the almost obsessive need to read it straight through. I flattered you think I approached that. Thanks for the review! - Mike PS - Sorry about the wait. My schedule is such that finding time to write can be problematic.




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