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Reviewer: GREYWOLF Signed Date: 2012.11.12 - 10:13AM Title: Chapter 2
Per your encouragement, I will continue your story. So Ginny is experiencing Post Traumatic Stess Syndrome. That is a start in explaining her 'fall from grace' but will require much development. I also seen an hint that there is a reason for her breakup with Harry, that it was not just selfishness on her part. I will see where you go with this, with hopefulness, though you've set yourself a very difficult task.
Since the story is finished, I won't comment on every chapter, but will give you my review for the overall story at the end.
Author's Response: Thanks! Really glad you gave it a second shot and I hope you like where it all ends here.
Reviewer: pottermania Signed Date: 2012.09.12 - 07:15PM Title: Chapter 2
I'm so relieved ginny made that decision. Knowing her character I don't think she could ever forgive herself, and although she's going to have to tell her family, her team, her friends and Lionel by the time the baby is born those who truly love her will be 100% behind her.
Reviewer: LuvinHG Signed Date: 2012.05.09 - 04:40PM Title: Chapter 2
Okay, that's a little better. I'm not talking about the chapter, I'm talking about my girl! :-)
Reviewer: Stephanie O Signed Date: 2012.02.13 - 11:39PM Title: Chapter 2
I'm relieved that Ginny didn't choose to abort her baby...but I'm doubting things will be all hunky-dory for her now, either. I really don't like Lionel, though...he's just been "keeping" her in his flat, and now he'll probably kick her out. What an a**.
Reviewer: Green Eyes Signed Date: 2011.07.24 - 10:33PM Title: Chapter 2
I forgot to add my stars to my last review. Sorry :-). I also just want to say that I really hope that you won’t let some of these nasty reviews deter you from plowing ahead with this story. “Dreadful”? You want to know what’s “dreadful”? Troll rating a story that so much careful thought and hard work has obviously gone into. If you really hate a story and feel compelled to let the author know that, fine. Say your piece succinctly and stop reading it. I certainly have done that a time or two. In fact, I almost did that here, but then I realized I was probably being hasty. I mean people are slamming Ginny’s character as if you didn’t know exactly what you were writing. Yes, this Ginny has made some really glaring mistakes in her post-Hogwarts life. But you know what: many, many people screw up their lives. I work every day with otherwise normal, talented, beautiful people who find themselves in terrible, controlling, abusive relationships. It happens. All of the time. If one is going to be so condemning and judgmental of such people, then you better be ready to cast the stone at your neighbors, friends, and even family members.
You showed me two things with Chapterer 2: 1) that you have a perfectly fine grasp of canon Ginny; and 2) there is still an awful lot that we the readers don’t know about what led Ginny down the path from Hogwarts Ginny to Lionel Ginny. I, for one, really look forward to reading how you get there.
Author's Response:
ThankyouThankyouThankyouThankyouThank you!!!! Its lacks eloquence but I'm okay with that :-)
This would be longer and more detailed but I'm starting work on chapter three now and I think you'd appreciate that more than a few paragraphs of response to your review. Just know that is GREATLY appreciated (and slightly needed at this point)Reviewer: HitokiriChapin Signed Date: 2011.07.24 - 05:10PM Title: Chapter 2
This story makes me wish getting a wand and performing obliviate on myself was humanly possible. The only thing that this "Ginny" has in common with Ginny Weasley is that they have the same name. Reading Ginny describe that douchebag as if he was this great guy and her being lucky to even have his attention made me want to throw up. Douchebag telling her that he did not want her to be the mother of his children and her not defending her self or even thinking of sending a nice bat bogey hex his way was painful. You are a good writer. But your concept and plot is just absolutely dreadful.
I've read some of the other responses you've made to the other reviewers about her having it tough during the war. I certainly agree with you there. But why didn't she go to Harry to help her? The one person in the world who could probably understand her better than anybody else. Why would she dump Harry and continue living her life as if nothing happened and even going as far as being douchebag's sex toy? For goodness sake she waited around and hoped for over five years for Harry to notice her and now you lead us to believe she would not do everything in her power to make things work between them? That she would be so weak and stupid to sleep with douchebag an hour after meeting him? That she would take his "charity" and allow him to rent her a flat and be fine with it? That she would even think she loves somebody who is the complete opposite of Harry and has no respect for her at all? Harry might have died for everybody, but his last thought was of her. I'm pretty sure he would have told her that and she would definitely not take him for granted knowing that. And do you really think her family would even invite or welcome this piece of dog poo into their home with them knowing how Harry felt about their daughter. What kind of a colossal bitch would Ginny have to be to even bring him home when he doesn't acknowledge her publicly as his girlfriend? Has she no shame?! She comes from a great family. Her parents would definitely have something to say about this situation. And her brothers would definitely pound douchebag's face.
And I haven't even mentioned the pregnancy. That she would even consider it and even let this douchebag almost talk her into it. And to put her down so completely. And for her not to even confront him and send him packing in that moment was horrible. I'm sorry but there is absolutely no way that Harry should even consider taking her back. He deserves someone who loves him not some slag who runs off at the first sign of trouble. Not someone who allows herself to be a kept woman. And certainly not someone who is carrying another mans child. Do you really expect us to believe that Harry would eventually take her back and if she has douchebag's kid, that he would help her raise him? That he would take back a woman who tried to make him choose between what he has always wanted to do and her? If she ever truly loved him at all, she would have never have given him that ultimatum. She would have stuck by his side and supported him just as he would have supported her quidditch career. For her to have the "lady balls" to make him chose when she plays a sport where she could be seriously hurt or killed herself and is not around as much considering she has practices and away matches where he probably would not be able to attend. If it was the other way around and it was Harry that made her choose I would be typing that Harry is a complete prick. We all have a right to be happy. But joy is best when you have someone you love share it with.
Like I said, you are a good writer. And it takes balls to put something you wrote out there and I admire anybody for that. But your Ginny is so completely ooc you might as well change the names and take it out the HP universe. Because if Harry not only takes her back pregnant and cares for her until she has that kid. And marries her and gives that child his name, he has got to be the worlds biggest idiot and he has no respect or love for himself. For him to take back somebody who made him choose between his job and a person who was not willing to work their ass off to make their relationship work, would be so completely stupid off him. How could he even trust her again? Why would he want to? Just loving someone will not make a relationship work or make them destined to be together.
Don't take it personal. But I love this fandom and I love this site. I just can't hold back when I see something like this posted on this site.
Author's Response: First off, thanks for replying and second, I don't take your thoughts or opinions personally. They're yours and you are both entitled to them and free to express them in an manner which you see fit. Plus, you said I'm a good writer and I'll take that complement happily from anybody every day of the week and twice on Sunday.
My hope for this is that when Harry and Ginny do start interacting more in the story, the less confusing her behavior is to readers. If readers let the story play out and let all the facts come to light, I think, for the most part, they'll be happy with the result. And if they're not, that's okay, too. Because as the author of this story, I know that I'm happy with they story I'm telling. I enjoyed conceiving it and letting it come to life on my computer screen is gratifying. I'm beyond satisifed with how this story plays out and that's all I need as a writer.
Best of luck in your future fanfic readings.
Author's Response: First off, thanks for replying and second, I don't take your thoughts or opinions personally. They're yours and you are both entitled to them and free to express them in an manner which you see fit. Plus, you said I'm a good writer and I'll take that complement happily from anybody every day of the week and twice on Sunday.
My hope for this is that when Harry and Ginny do start interacting more in the story, the less confusing her behavior is to readers. If readers let the story play out and let all the facts come to light, I think, for the most part, they'll be happy with the result. And if they're not, that's okay, too. Because as the author of this story, I know that I'm happy with they story I'm telling. I enjoyed conceiving it and letting it come to life on my computer screen is gratifying. I'm beyond satisifed with how this story plays out and that's all I need as a writer.
Best of luck in your future fanfic readings.
Reviewer: ginnyweasley777 Signed Date: 2011.07.24 - 04:59PM Title: Chapter 2
I'm predicting fireworks when Lionel finds out she's keeping it
looking forward to seeing how Harry comes onto the scene
Author's Response: I'm trying to catch up on reviews while working on chapter 3 so I'm sorry this is so late. Thank you for reading and offering a reply. I'm off of work for the week so hopefully I can get chapter 3 up by the weekend. No promises but I'm going to give it my best shot. It's the chapter where things really get going.
Reviewer: hushpuppy22 Signed Date: 2011.07.22 - 10:45PM Title: Chapter 2
I don't hold with the "it's well written so I'll let the author do anything" way of viewing fanfiction. To me, the character is paramount. That's the biggest problem with this story--this girl is not Ginny Weasley. She cares more about partying than her family, she isn't honest with herself or the people around her. She is a slag, she does not stand up for herself, she allows herself to be used, she's irresponsible, she doesn't love Harry, she fell in love with a b@stard, and she's shallow. This girl has nothing to do with Ginny Weasley from the books.
Even if it was okay that she isn't in character, this character isn't good enough for Harry Potter. She left Harry because she was stressed but unwilling to be honest with him or herself. But she was willing to have a two year relationship with a guy she slept with hours after meeting him. She loves a man who does not acknowledge her in public as his girlfriend/lover. She passionately loves a man that her family doesn't like or respect. A man that is using her for sex. A man that neither respect nor loves her. She thinks so little of herself that she would stay with this man but we are supposed to believe that she should be Ginny Potter? She was off being a party girl while Harry was protecting people and probably trying to mend his heart. Is this woman and another man's kid supposed to be his reward for fighting evil and surviving? Is he supposed to give his father's name to another man's child? Is he supposed to raise love this kid, who represents everything that went wrong with Ginny? What kind of heartbreak would it bring to look into the face of this kid seeing the result of your heartbreak? To see the physical manifestation of Ginny's passionate relationship with a smooth, shallow, manipulative, dishonorable prick that she LOVED more than she loved you, the man that died for her? This child represents the fact that Ginny loved and was faithful to someone who couldn't be less like Harry. Add the fact that Ginny's relationship with the prick was longer than her relationship with Harry and that she never would have left the prick if she hadn't gotten pregnant and you have heartbreak for Harry.
Unless he's a masochist, he'd be an idiot to get within five feet of this girl and her child. Unless *many* years pass before they get together, I don't thing there is a way to sell the pairing of Harry Potter and this girl. In fact, if this wasn't a H/G site, I would beg you to make this Harry/OC because he deserves happiness with a strong, noble, courageous,loving, adventurous woman who adores him.
Reviewer: dseay Signed Date: 2011.07.22 - 12:32AM Title: Chapter 2
This should be interesting to see where yo go with this since I already see two different personalities in Ginny. Chapter 1, in my opinion, showed Ginny as almost being self centered for her make a damand on Harry whom she was suppose to be head over heals for since she was 10. She then is letting this new boyfriend control her and that is not a Ginny I am use to seeing. Now Ginny is showing strength and making her own choice. Should be interesting to see how it goes when Harry does finally enter the picture. What will his reactions be and how will they get through thid?
Author's Response:
Thanks for replying! The thing with Ginny that will become more clear as the story goes on is that the war left a huge mark on her. She'll be exploring her past and the choices she made that led her to where she is now, pregnant by a man who probably never loved her and that she might not have loved in return.
This section is slightly spoilery so don't read if you don't want to know too much
In their conversation in the first chapter, you are only seeing a tiny, tiny segment of it. There was more to Ginny's thought process for breaking up with Harry than she didn't just want him to be an Auror. I was intentionally vague about it b/c her real reason for ending things with him will be revealed later on. I hope if you continue reading that you like what's in store.
Reviewer: Ginny Guerra Signed Date: 2011.07.21 - 09:04PM Title: Chapter 2
I knew she wouldn't do it!
A couple typos, but nice chapter!
Author's Response: Of course she wouldn't but I had to make sure you'd read the next chapter, right? As for the typos, I am doing this without the help of a beta, which means I'm rereading the piece about twenty different times before I post it which means I can skim over some stuff and miss things. I am trying to get better with it but grammer has never been my friend. If I had my way, I'd probably write about four sentances that are a thousand words a piece! Glad you enjoyed it and thanks for replying.
Reviewer: Green Eyes Signed Date: 2011.07.21 - 04:40PM Title: Chapter 2
Another very well written chapter. You really have a way with words. My main reaction is that there seems to be a real disconnect between the broken, sympathetic Ginny who we see in Chapter 2 and the feisty, flirty Ginny of Chapter 1 who slept with Lionel so quickly and who shared with him a “delightfully fun and deliciously passionate” relationship in which they “laughed and loved with the ease of breathing.” I assume future chapters will explore more of how she got from Point A to Point B (and then back to Point A again)? There is a remarkable story on SIYE called Come Ready and See Me by starrymoonmaiden in which Ginny is in a controlling and abusive relationship with a guy who seems not unlike Lionel. Anyhow, I am interested to see where you take this from here.
Author's Response: Another great review, thank you so much! I'm playing around a lot with memories in this story so there might be some initial gaps but those should get fewer and farther between as we continue. Ginny's journey from just after to the war to when she met Lionel will be chronicled in more detail and she and her actions will hopefully make more sense to readers
"Come Ready and See Me" was one of the first Harry Potter fics I ever read. I admit to finishing that before finishing the books themselves. I can't say that it was an influence to this story persay b/c I haven't gone back and reread it recently but it was an inspiration to me in terms of seeing the amazing quality of work that some authors can produce in this writing culture.
Reviewer: amanda163 Signed Date: 2011.07.21 - 03:26PM Title: Chapter 2
Interesting concept, there isn't many stories that are like this so i'm interested to see where you take this!
Now if Ginny's preggers with another mans child what is Harry's issue going to be?? i'm excited to find out!
Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing, it is really appreicated.
One of the reasons I came up with this was b/c there is SO many ways their story could have gone! We don't get a lot after DH on their backstory and I for am kind of glad JKR kept it to herself. It gives her fans the gift of letting her charcters live one in our hearts and imaginations. It let this story pop in my mind and let me create a character like Nell, who I hope that you enjoyed b/c we'll be seeing more of her later ;-)
Reviewer: Emlyn Signed Date: 2011.07.21 - 02:50PM Title: Chapter 2
Poor Ginny. Sounds like she's never really recovered from the War. I'm so glad she found the strength to be her own person. I guess next chapter, all hell breaks loose? Can't wait to see what happens.
Author's Response: Thanks for responding. I'm truly floored by all the feedback I've gotten with this piece so far.
As someone whose endured emotional trauma, I just don't think you can go through such a turbulant, violent year that ended with so much death in the Final Batle and not come through it unscathed. You can get back to where you were and who you were but it takes work and a fair amount of pain. I really wanted to explore that idea with someone so universal thought as strong, like Ginny.
Reviewer: Dad Signed Date: 2011.07.21 - 12:15PM Title: Chapter 2
Poor Ginny has got her life into a right mess, but she is now doing the right things to sort it out. Looking forward to more.
Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing. Yeah I'm really throwing her life in the dryer right now with the setting on heavy duty but she will get her bearings back. Eventually. And then I'll completely pull the rug out from undernesth her again. Because that's the fun for me of writing, creating situations with no clear or defined exit strategy and seeing what the characters do with them.
Reviewer: Pilargirl Signed Date: 2011.07.21 - 11:35AM Title: Chapter 2
Want to read more! I mean, I'm a little sceptic, I'm a die hard HG shipper, so a story where she's pregnant with someone who isn't Harry's baby is always a little hard for me to get into...but this looks like it's well-written so I'm gonna give it a try :)
Author's Response: Thanks so much! I'm hardcore H/G shipper to the soles of my feet so I don't think this story will disappoint you. Make you want to tear your hair out during some parts off it but I think (fingers crossed) people will like what happens when Harry and Ginny come face to face again.
BTW, I haven't reviewed it yet b/c I am working forty hours a week while working on this story but I love The Commoner Queen! Such a great AU concept you came up with. Makes me happy to know that you're a fan of this.
