Does Your Boyfriend Have Long-Term Potential? by lilyevans_Jan30



Summary: ** Winner of Best Overall in the Seven Words Challenge **
Harry vs. Ron: it all began with a quiz in Witch Weekly
Rating: R starstarstarstarstar
Categories: Post-DH/AB, Seven Words Challenge (2009-4)
Characters: None
Genres: None
Warnings: None
Challenges: None
Series: None
Published: 2009.08.16
Updated: 2009.08.31


Does Your Boyfriend Have Long-Term Potential? by lilyevans_Jan30
Chapter 1: The Bet
Author's Notes:

“Wands out, do you think?” Harry looked at Ron. He nodded.

“Definitely. This looks way too suspicious for my comfort.”

Cautiously, the two young men approached a pair of witches who were sitting under a tree, giggling over a magazine.

“I’ll get their wands, you get the Witch Weekly,” said Harry tersely. Their approach had apparently gone unnoticed, which concerned him even more.

“On my count,” agreed Ron. “One . . . two . . . three.”

“Expelliarmus!” roared Harry, neatly catching the wands that flew up off the grass.

“Wingardium Leviosa!” cried Ron, deftly grabbing the magazine as it floated into the sky.

The witches — Ginny and Hermione in appearance at least — looked up, amazed.

“What the hell?” began Ginny. “Harry, give me back my wand this instant.” Her eyes narrowed dangerously and Harry relaxed a bit. This was the Ginny he knew and loved.

“Ronald, you had better have an extremely plausible explanation for your behavior,” fumed Hermione. Next to Harry, Ron chuckled. “Okay, so maybe it is them, mate.” He suddenly looked nervous. “And we just took their wands without warning.”

“Harry . . .” Ginny’s voice had a warning in it. He hastily threw her wand back to her.

“Sorry, Ginny,” he said, giving Hermione her wand too. “But in our defense, we didn’t think it was actually you two. I mean, I’ve never seen either of you so giddy over something in Witch Weekly. Ron and I thought you were Lavender and Parvati in Polyjuice .”

“Or worse,” said Ron darkly. He held up his hands in surrender and Hermione grabbed back the magazine.

“So what’s so interesting in there anyway?” asked Harry. “Don’t tell me they suddenly got a decent Quidditch reporter who writes about something other than a ranking of the players based solely on how good they look in their uniforms.”

“I still can’t believe how sexist they were — leaving out all the female players,” grumbled Hermione.

Ron smirked. “I agree completely, Hermione.” He ducked when she reached out to smack him and the magazine fell to the ground, open.

“Rate Your Boyfriend’s Long-Term Potential?” read Harry. “Is that what you two were doing? Rating us?”

Ginny grinned. “Yep. It’s an interactive quiz with guaranteed accurate results. “

“What if you lie?” asked Harry. He was now reading part of the quiz upside-down. “I mean, what’s to stop you from telling the magazine that I’m a great cook in order to get extra points?”

“Well,” began Ginny. She leaned forward suddenly and plucked a couple of hairs out of Harry’s head. Before he could even protest, she held them over the open magazine, waved her wand, and quickly mumbled something. The hairs disappeared into the pages as if sucked down by a whirlpool.

“What was that for?” asked Harry, rubbing his head. “Those better not be used by someone at Witch Weekly to make Potter-flavored Polyjuice.”

Ron snorted. “I should suggest that to George — I bet it would make a fortune. Can’t you see the ads? ‘Your man not all there in the looks department? Don’t despair — slip him a draught of Potterjuice and get it on with the Chosen One!’” He collapsed in a fit of laughter and even Ginny and Hermione started laughing.

Harry reached over and plucked a couple of hairs out of Ron’s head. “Better let them make a Weasley-flavored version too,” he said. “It’ll make the hour with me that much better by comparison.”

While Ron smacked him Hermione grabbed the hairs and performed the same spell as Ginny. “It’s not for Polyjuice, of course,” she said. “It’s just to register you with the quiz so it will know that our answers are true.”

“And what does it tell you at the end?” asked Harry. “Whether to keep us around or chuck us for a better model?”

“Pretty much, yes,” said Ginny, nodding solemnly.

“Heh,” said Ron. “I’m such a perfect boyfriend the magazine will probably not know what to do with such a high score.”

“Oh yeah,” said Harry. “What do you want to bet that I do even better?”

“Hey now,” said Hermione quickly. “This isn’t supposed to be a contest, just a fun way to analyze your relationship.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” said Ginny lightly. “It might be kind of fun to see who does better. “ Her grin grew a little wicked. “Since it’s going to be Harry, of course.”

“Uh oh,” said Harry quietly to her. “Now you’ve done it.” For Ron was already starting to sputter with indignation.

“You’re on,” he said firmly. “I bet I can score higher on the quiz than Harry and prove I’m a better boyfriend. The loser, and his girlfriend, have to do all the chores for the winner and his girlfriend for a week. No magic.”

Next to him, Harry heard Ginny swallow hard. He knew how much she hated doing work without magic now that she was of age. She stuck out her hand. “You’re on.”

“How will this work, do you think?” asked Hermione. She was skimming the pages with the same intensity she might show to Hogwarts, A History. Before any of them could even answer, she nodded to herself and looked up at the rest of them. “It’s actually quite simple.”

Harry grinned. “Of course it is. Care to explain it to the rest of us?”

Hermioine swatted him. “There are seven categories of questions to rate you in. Since we’ve really got nothing planned this week, how about we do one category each day? You and Ron have the entire day to try to show us how good you are as a boyfriend for that category and then at the end of the day we’ll submit our answers to the magazine. At the end of the week it will tell us who’s won.”

“That seems fair,” agreed Ginny. “I’m in.” She held out her hand and Hermione shook it.

“What’s the first category?” asked Ron.

Hermione picked up the magazine. “Interests,” she said. “You need to show how much your boyfriend has in common with you.”

“That’ll be easy,” said Harry. “Cause Ginny and I both love Quidditch.” He was surprised when his girlfriend suddenly pinched him. “Ow, what?”

Ginny was shaking her head at him. “Nothing. Umm, good. How about we meet back here before dinner to score the first category?”

Harry watched as Ron and Hermione walked off, already bickering about what sorts of things they were both interested in. “I hope the quiz doesn’t give points for both of them liking to fight,” he said. “But why did you pinch me?”

“Because I don’t want to give Ron and Hermione any ideas,” said Ginny. “About how we’re going to win, I mean.”

Harry raised his eyebrows. “You sound awfully sure about that,” he said.

“I am,” said Ginny darkly. “I refuse to do a week of Muggle chores. No matter what it takes, we’re going to make you the best boyfriend in the history of boyfriends.”

Harry grinned at her. “I don’t mind chores nearly as much as you do, you know,” he said. “But for your sake, I hope you’re right.”

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