Seeking the Truth by Been Reading
Summary: *** The author has been reminded via the e-mail address on file that this story is listed as incomplete and has not been updated since 2006 ***
**March Dumbledore Silver Trinket Award winner for Best Drama and Best Romance**
Ginny Weasley's excited about starting her first real job after finishing school, except for one small thing: she'll have to face Harry Potter for the first time in over a year. Ginny struggles to deal with feelings she thought she had long put behind her, and with figuring out what really happened between Harry and Ron to fuel Ron's sudden hatred of his ex-best mate. Ginny is forced to make the ultimate decision... true love or family loyalty.
Rating: PG-13
Categories: Post-OotP
Characters: None
Genres: None
Warnings: None
Challenges: None
Series: None
Published: 2005.05.02
Updated: 2006.08.24
Seeking the Truth by Been Reading
Chapter 1: Prologue
Author's Notes: Disclaimer: I don’t own anything in the Harry Potter universe
Day After Voldemort’s Fall
Ron’s voice went from being loud and full of hurt to quiet and cold. “You’ve ruined my life. I hate you. If you ever come near me or my family again, I’ll kill you with my bare hands.”
Ginny sat at her desk in the seventh year girls’ dormitory. All of her roommates were somewhere enjoying the nice weather, but she just wanted to be by herself. That was actually all she wanted to do most of the time. Of course, being Head Girl, she couldn’t stay locked up in her room all day, but she didn’t spend much time socializing either. Today, she had a real excuse to be in her room by herself; she had a rare letter from one of her brothers. Technically, Ron had only written her because she had written him first, but news from her family was always nice. Ginny glanced around the room to make sure she was alone before opening the seal on the letter.
Dear Ginny,
I was so happy to receive your letter. I miss talking to you every day, but I suppose that is just as much my fault as it is yours. Work has been keeping me busy, but I love my job. I’ve been attending as many games as possible, strictly on work related business, of course. (Although between you and me, I was cheering my arse off when the Cannons beat the Arrows.)
In regards to your letter, I don’t think poorly of you for not wanting to live at the Burrow after you finish with Hogwarts. Merlin knows I’m not really enjoying it, but I can’t seem to bring myself to leave just yet. I’m thinking about getting a flat with one of Cannons’ Beaters, Jeffrey Collins, before next season starts. He’s a good bloke and we’ve gotten to be good friends this year. He’s one of the Beaters still in the running for the national team. I’m telling you, they’re going all out this year for the World Cup. I think they want to prove that things will be better than they were before the war. They’ve had all of the players who are in the running at an extensive training camp for the last two weeks. The final announcement will be made at a big banquet right after the Leaving Feast, and then they’re moving all of the team members into a big manor with its own Quidditch pitch so they can practice all of the time and bond as a team. If I were a betting man, I’d put money on Jeff making the team. It’s too bad that with my inside connections, I can’t bet on Quidditch anymore.
Sorry, I was rambling, but this is where my good news comes in. You’re incredibly lucky to have me in the department. My boss Mr. Perry came storming into my office the other day complaining about the terrible work ethic of the Manager Overseeing Team members (or Mum as the guys affectionately call her). The next day she got into a fight with Coach Mason and quit. Needless to say, Mr. Perry was stressed out. That is, until I told him I had a sister who was looking for a job. He was concerned about your age, but I assured him you never had any problem keeping your older brothers in line. That, coupled with the fact that you were made Head Girl, was enough for him. I’m not going to lie… this isn’t a glamorous job. It’s a lot of work and very little glory. You’d be in charge of making sure the team was at the right place at the right time, saying all the right things. You’d also be in charge of settling any team disputes, and making sure the team always has everything they need. Despite all that, it pays well and it’d get you away from the house.
There’s one other thing I’m not sure you’d like about the job. He’s in the running to make the team. Personally, I think the Pride’s Seeker is better, but Jeff tells me it looks like he’s going to make it. I bet it’s just a publicity stunt. Imagine, putting an under qualified player on the national team because he’s a ‘hero’. It’s enough to make me cheer for Ireland or Scotland instead. Don’t tell Mr. Perry I said that, though. He thought he’s the best thing to happen to Quidditch in a long time. Sorry, I’m rambling again. The point is, the job is yours if you want it.
I hope your N.E.W.T.s are going well. I’m sure you’ll do better than I did; I was a little distracted around this time last year. Speaking of which, I guess I’ll be seeing you at the memorial. Don’t waste your time trying to get out of it, I already did. Dad said he didn’t care how much I didn’t want to see them, I owed it to everyone to be there. It really doesn’t feel like it’s been a year already. It feels like yesterday.
Love from your favorite brother,
Ron
P.S. If you do accept the job, you’ll have to start working right after the Leaving Feast. You’ll have to attend the banquet where they’re announcing the team. Jeff says he’d love to take you as his date.
Ginny set down the letter from her brother and sighed. She was tempted to curl up in bed, close the curtains, and hug her pillow for comfort. The world seemed like a lot happier place when she was alone and safe in her bed. If you had asked her a year ago, spending time with Harry Potter would have been a job perk instead of a reason not to take a job. So much had changed since the days when Harry would come and stay at the Burrow like a real member of her family. Now, she wasn’t sure that anyone left in her family still remembered a time when they acted like a family.
Ginny would never forget what was left of her family when they gathered in an empty classroom, still bloody from battle and freshly grieving all of their losses after Voldemort’s defeat. Despite his own pain, her father was urging Ron to make things right with Harry while they still had the chance. Ron had reluctantly agreed only to furiously return a while later.
His tone had shaken Ginny to her core, and his words were etched in her mind forever: “Harry Potter is not welcome in my presence, ever.”
The rest of her family wasn’t exactly sure what had happened, but they could tell that Ron was serious. And just like that, Harry Potter–the boy that saved her life, her best friend, and such a big part of her family for the last seven years–was shunned and banned.
Since then, Ron had made a lifestyle of avoiding Harry. Instead of going into Auror training like everyone had expected they’d do together, Ron took a job in the Department of Magical Games and Sports. He loved the job, until he found out that Harry had also forgone Auror training to play Quidditch. Ginny had long ago lost track of the number of work functions Ron had skipped to avoid being in the same room with Harry. Ron never offered an explanation of his actions to his family, but Ginny knew enough. She didn’t know what the final words were spoken between them, but she knew what had started the fight. When the press reported that Harry and Hermione had moved in together, the rest of the family caught on to what she already knew had happened.
Ginny felt her stomach flutter in anger and she slammed her hands down on the desk in frustration. She didn’t think it was fair that she had been put in such difficult position because of Harry. She dropped her head on her desk hard, rattling everything on it. She thought about her situation for a few more moments before she realized that this wasn’t about Ron, Harry, and Hermione. She knew it was about a job; a great job she’d love to take. Ginny hated herself for being silly and allowing Harry to break her heart. She could live with what he did to her, unlike Ron, but there were so many questions running through her mind: Could she face him after all this time? Could she work with him? Could she afford to pass up the job? It wasn’t even a guarantee he’d make the national team. Ginny made her decision right then and there: she wasn’t going to let him dictate what she should and should not do, like Ron had. In fact, she liked the thought of spending enough time with him to give him a piece of her mind. She’d love to tell him off for what he did to Ron and what he was currently doing to Hermione. Ginny pulled out a clean sheet of parchment, her favorite quill, and a bottle of violet ink.
Dear Ron,
Thank you so much! You’ve saved me, at least until after the World Cup. I graciously accept the job offer. As for your concerns; to hell with Harry Potter! I will not pass this opportunity up because he’s a git. I can handle him, don’t you worry.
As for the memorial, I’m ashamed of you! How could you be so selfish and not want to go, solely because you’re too chicken to face them. You need to pay your respects, Ron. You don’t have to stay long, but come by and let your presence be known. You should stop letting them dictate how you live your life. Move on, they obviously have. I love you and I’ll see you soon.
Love always,
Ginny
P.S. Tell Jeffrey I’d love to be his date.
Ron slowly walked through Hogsmeade remembering the attack that started the end of the war, and ended his relationship with Hermione. He felt like he was going to be physically ill as he passed by the place where they’d had a picnic lunch that day. His heart broke all over again every time he thought about it. He had been too busy planning a romantic date for their one year anniversary to notice the love of his life slipping through his fingers and into the arms of his best mate.
Make that former best mate, Ron thought bitterly as he dragged his feet onward. He realized his hands had unconsciously clenched into fists. He sighed and tried to relax, but he couldn’t keep his thoughts away from Hermione. When he was honest with himself, he could see how it happened and he didn’t know why they had bothered to deny it. Their continued denial only infuriated him more as articles in Witch Weekly highlighting their romance started to appear. And, as much as he hated it, he couldn’t seem to stop reading the articles. He knew all about the flat they shared, their romantic dinners for two, their appearances at Ministry functions and, worst of all, Harry’s nights out with other women…. It all made him physically sick.
Ron winced as he thought of the awful things he had said to Harry in the heat of the moment. He hadn’t meant to be harsh, but he was hurt and didn’t know what he was saying. It was too late to take it back, though; too much had happened now. Their relationship was beyond repair, especially with how Harry was treating Hermione.
Ron had reacted the only way he knew how: he made space. He cut himself off from his two best friends and, unintentionally, his family as well. He found himself starting over at the Ministry on his own with people who knew nothing about his family and his past friendship with Harry Potter. He was polite and people liked him, but he was scared to let them get too close because he was scared of getting hurt again. It was hard for him to trust new people when the people he used to trust more than anyone else in the world had betrayed him.
Ron shook his head, trying to shake out all of the bad memories. He realized he was at the Hogwarts gates. Gathering all of his strength, he strode onto the grounds where so many had lost their lives.
“Ron!”
Ron turned around just in time to catch his sister who had flung herself into his arms, sobbing. He was momentarily startled, but he regained his composure and began to comfort his sister.
“Shh,” Ron whispered. “It will be okay.”
“I just miss them so much.” Ginny sniffed. She pulled back and wiped her puffy, red eyes.
Ron was surprised that Ginny was so upset. He never got the feeling that she was still distressed from the few letters they had exchanged throughout the year. He assumed it was just because of the current timing.
“I can’t be around all of those people inside right now.” Ginny’s voice was cracking and Ron could tell that she was fighting to not start crying again.
“Has it started? Am I late?” Ron asked. He didn’t want to draw any unnecessary attention to himself by walking in after the ceremony had already started.
Ginny’s mood seemed to change from sad to angry as she threw her hands up in the air in frustration. “No. The family’s inside, but they’re not even sitting together! Dad was so sad; I think everyone was avoiding him. How did we end up like this? I want to be strong for everyone, but I don’t think I can be.”
Ron felt slightly ashamed for entertaining the thought of skipping the memorial. He hadn’t realized how important it was to Ginny.
“You don’t have to be strong anymore; let me be strong for you.” Ron slid his arm over her shoulders, led her back to the castle, and walked into the Great Hall together.
“Ron,” he heard his dad say. Even though Ron still lived at home with his father, he couldn’t believe how much older he looked since he had last seen him that morning. “I’m glad you’re here.”
As if I had much choice, Ron thought bitterly. He simply nodded and gave his father a hug. He took the seat between his father and Ginny, keeping a tight grip on Ginny’s hand for support. He kept his focus toward the empty stage at the front of the room, not wanting to be drawn into a conversation with anyone.
Slowly the somber whispers of the crowd died out and Ron noticed everyone turning their attention toward the back of the room. Fighting his better instincts, he turned around to see what everyone was looking at. Immediately, he regretted the decision. Headmistress McGonagall walked into the room followed by Harry, whose hand was clasped tightly with Hermione’s. Ron inwardly cursed himself for noticing how much weight she had lost. She no longer looked like the brilliant, confident witch he loved; she looked sad and unsure of herself, like a lost little girl.
Ron had to use every muscle in his body to resist his urges to wipe the tears from her face. That’s not my job anymore. The slimy git doesn’t even know what he has, Ron thought sourly. He could tell that Harry was using the same keep-your-focus-in-front-of-you tactic he had been using earlier. Ron watched as Harry gave Hermione a tight hug before leaving her to go onto the stage with McGonagall.
“Welcome, students, alumni, guests,” McGonagall began somberly. “Today marks the one year anniversary of the day Voldemort,” she hesitated as a slight shudder rippled through the crowd, “was defeated. At this time, please join me in welcoming Harry Potter.” A polite applause echoed through the room as Harry uncomfortably made his way forward.
“Um, hello,” he began awkwardly. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen so many of you, but it feels like we were all here fighting together yesterday. The Ministry wanted to throw a big party to celebrate the fall of Voldemort, but it didn’t feel right to me. Those of you who were there during that final battle know it wasn’t something that has to be celebrated.” Harry paused for a moment, looking like he was struggling to keep his emotions in check. He adjusted his glasses on his face and cleared his throat before starting again.
“So much was lost and so many people gave their lives. That’s why we’re here today: to remember and honor those who gave everything they had to defeat Voldemort. Without them, I could never have succeeded. If I could have traded my own life for any of theirs, I would gladly have, but that was not what fate intended. So please, on this day, remember those who were lost, and live your lives in honor of their memories.”
The crowd burst into an applause but Ron couldn’t bring himself to join them. He couldn’t believe how hypocritical Harry was; Harry stole as much as he lost. People still worshiped the ground Harry walked on and would do anything he ever asked of them. Harry got to lead the golden life and Ron would trade places with him in a heart beat.
Ron watched as Harry walked off of the stage, gathered a sobbing Hermione, and exited the Great Hall. Several more people spoke, but it was all a blur to Ron. His body was in the room, but his mind was back at the battle. He vaguely remembered comforting Ginny as she cried, but despite all of his pain, he couldn’t release all of the emotions he had ignored for so long.
When the ceremony was over, he bid his goodbyes to his family and rushed off the premises. He hurried to the Three Broomsticks so he could Floo back to the Ministry and get back to work. He had worked so hard to create a new life that was free from each painful memory; he wasn’t going to allow himself to fall back into his old life now.
A/N I promise that despite initial appearances this is a Harry/Ginny story. From this point forward the story is only Ginny’s POV, and you’ll only know what she knows.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.
This story archived at http://www.siye.co.uk/siye/viewstory.php?sid=6543