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A Good Explanation
By the mystery tramp

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Category: Twin Travel Challenge (2008-3)
Characters:None
Genres: Comedy, Humor
Warnings: Death
Story is Complete
Rating: PG
Reviews: 27
Summary: A good explanation of how and why the children arrived in the Weasleys' living room.
Hitcount: Story Total: 6105



Disclaimer: Harry Potter Publishing Rights © J.K.R. Note the opinions in this story are my own and in no way represent the owners of this site. This story subject to copyright law under transformative use. No compensation is made for this work.





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A Good Explanation
by the mystery tramp


The Dark Lord Voldemort had conceived a multitude of plans for his sure-to-be-imminent defeat of The Boy Who Just Wouldn't Die, Harry Potter. However, as of yet, none of his plans had quite been successful. In fact, they had all failed miserably, which was why the Dark Lord Voldemort was now drowning his sorrows in an abundance of firewhisky, and feeling like a miserable failure.

"None of my plans have panned out!" he cried.

"None of my plots have been hot!" he wept.

"None of my attempts–" he said, verklempt, "...have turned out very well at all."

"It's OK, my Lord," said Wormtail comfortingly, "you've had lots of great plans. You've just had rotten luck. I'm sure the next one will turn out just splendid."

"I'm all out of plans," said Voldemort, morose. "I've tried everything."

"I'm sure you haven't tried everything," said Lucius Malfoy. "Certainly there are dozens of things you have not yet attempted that will be sure to finish off Potter for good–"

"Like what?" demanded Voldemort.

Malfoy fell silent.

Severus Snape, also present at this Death-Eater-meeting-come-evil-overlord-t herapy-session, was getting annoyed. He found the Dark Lord's behavior to be nothing short of childish, and was growing tired of this sort of thing. He had already been in a less-than-spectacular mood to begin with after dealing with Albus Dumbledore's spontaneous redecorating of his Potions Dungeon at Hogwarts, which was likely what led him to make a most sarcastic, flippant remark when he normally would have remained silent:

"You could always disguise yourself as Potter's future child, and pretend to come back from the future," he said.

"I LIKE IT!" shouted Voldemort, raising a fist into the air. Snape's mouth fell open.

"I was jo–"

"I knew I accepted you back into my good graces for something, Snape! And since you came up with the idea, I'm going to let you come with me!"

Snape blinked.

Oh joy, he thought.

* * *


It was the middle of August, before Harry's fifth year at Hogwarts.

"Could you pass the mashed potatoes, Ron, I do really love those potatoes and you see, they're all the way on the other side of the table–"

A typical Sunday dinner at the Weasleys.

"It is so good to have you back with us again, Harry, I was afraid Dumbledore would never let you stay, what with You-Know-Who returning and Cedric dying and you almost dying and the entire Wizarding World being on the brink of a massive war, and all, but it's so nice to see you again–would you like some potatoes–?"

All the family was there–including Harry and Hermione.

"Could you please pass those back over here, Harry, dear, they were on their way down here when Molly detoured them over to you, and you know, I do really love potatoes–"

It was the loud pop! of an Apparition from the living room that silenced everybody.

"Silence, everybody! I heard the loud pop! of an Apparition! From the living room!"

They all listened for a hint of who might have arrived, as they were not expecting any visitors.

"But we're not expecting any visitors..."

The only thing they could faintly make out were… children arguing.

"This is ridiculous, my Lor–Lily, this is absolutely ridiculous–"

Very young children.

"Be quiet, James. I will not tolerate your insolence."

The entire table of Weasleys furrowed their collective brows. Insolence? What sort of child says–

"What sort of child says insolence? You have got to be more careful–"

Finally, the Weasleys, and Harry, and Hermione, seemed to spring to life after being dazed by the confusing conversation they were overhearing. They made their way towards the living room, rather resembling a small mob. When they arrived, they were greeted by a most unexpected sight.

There were two children–they both looked the same age, about six or seven. An adorable little boy, already identified as James, and a girl–Lily he had called her–with long, red hair, and bright, green eyes.

At the front of the mob, Harry's mouth dropped open, and tears began to well in his eyes.

"Mum...? Dad...?!" he asked with bated breath.

Lily's eyes widened. Why hadn't they thought of this? "No! I'm not your mum! You're my mum! I mean–my dad–er–I'm your daughter!" And she smiled a wide smile, attempting to appear as innocent as possible.

Harry blinked.

"What?"

"It's true," said Lily. "We've come from the future, to warn you of imminent danger."

"I find that pretty hard to believe."

("So do I," murmured James, but no one heard him.)

"Er..." began Lily, "Would you believe, we've come from the future so that you can prevent some sort of cataclysmic event that will destroy civilization as you know it?"

"Probably not."

"How about we've come to tell you who wins the next World Cup?"

"WHO?!" asked Ron excitedly.

Hermione punched him.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"Just shush."

"Slush? Where?"

"No, I said–never mind."

"You did not say never mind, you said slush. Now where is it–?"

"SHUT UP RON!"

"Fine."

"So... you're telling me you're my kids, back from the future?"

"Yes," said Lily, nodding and grinning that 'innocent' grin.

"But you look like my parents."

("That was an oversight," murmured James.)

"And you have the same names as my parents."

"Funny how that works out, isn't it? Heh heh..." said Lily.

"They must be telling the truth," said Ron. "Nobody'd be stupid enough to pretend to be your kids, but then use your parents' names and look just like your parents..."

"Heh heh, heh heh..." said Lily.

"Of course not," said James.

"You're awfully smart-sounding for seven year olds."

"Our parents raised us well," said James smoothly.

Harry smiled, proudly. "Oh? And who's your mother?"

"Harry!" scolded Hermione. "You can't ask that! You could destroy the space-time continuum!"

("I doubt it," murmured James.)

"You know, it's weird," said Ron. "The girl kind of looks like Ginny, with Harry's eyes."

Silence.

"Oh," said Harry.

"Oh," said Ginny, from within the mob. She found herself pushed to the front, so that she could share an awkward gaze with Harry.

Silence. Then:

"You wanna snog?"

"Sure," said Ginny, and they disappeared from the room. Lily reached an arm out, as though to stop them from leaving so that she could finish some sort of business with Harry, but her arm fell limp.

A few moments passed in silence while the realization dawned on the rest of the group. Then:

"GRANDCHILDREN!" shouted Molly, knocking down several people like bowling pins on the way to scooping up both Lily and James in her arms and squeezing them so their eyes bulged out.

"Can't–breathe–" said Lily.

Molly ignored her. Which was unfortunate, because she was indeed cutting off Lily's air supply.

"Wait a minute," said Hermione, eyes wide in realization. "Didn't you all hear that loud pop! when they arrived? These people Apparated! How could six year olds Apparate...?"

("Oh dear," murmured James.)

It was too late, however, for Hermione to put the pieces together and figure out what was going on, because suddenly, after a minute or two of not breathing, the small girl's body fell limp in Molly's arms and promptly turned into the body of an old, scaly, bald man. Who also happened to be dead.

Molly shrieked.

"AAAAAHHH!" shrieked Molly, letting go of James, who promptly Disapparated with a sigh of relief.

"I'VE KILLED HER! I KILLED MY GRANDDAUGHTER! I KILLED MY GRANDDAUGHTER AND TURNED HER INTO YOU-KNOW-WHO!"

"That wasn't your granddaughter," said Hermione. "That was You-Know-Who! You defeated You-Know-Who, Mrs. Weasley!"

"But why on earth would You-Know-Who pretend to be Harry and Ginny's daughter?"

"So that he could get close enough to him to kill him, of course!"

Ron nodded, then frowned and furrowed his brow. "But... why would he pretend to be Harry and Ginny's daughter?"

"Oh shush," said Hermione.

"Where?!" said Ron.

THE END
Reviews 27
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