Please, please PLEASE consider checking out my novel, Duplicity by Sarah Jaune on amazon, BN and other platforms. It comes out in just over a month in April 2020. It's the story of something that actually happened to me and nearly ruined my life, but slightly fictionalized so the wench doesn't come after me again... share with your friends!
Thanks Arnel for your help and support!
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The Space Between | ||||||
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Category: Post-Hogwarts, Post-DH/AB, Post-DH/PM Characters:All Genres: Action/Adventure, Drama, Fluff, General, Humor, Tragedy Warnings: Dark Fiction, Death, Disturbing Imagery, Extreme Language, Intimate Sexual Situations, Mental Abuse, Mild Language, Mild Sexual Situations, Negative Alcohol Use, Rape, Sexual Situations, Spouse/Adult/Child Abuse, Violence, Violence/Physical Abuse Rating: R Reviews: 584 Summary: Harry and Ginny's lives have finally evened out. They've faced trauma, and loss, more than most have, but they've fought hard to find a normal. If only things could stay that way... Old enemies find new ways to seek revenge. This story is the sequel to Bound. It would be extremely helpful if you read that first. Warnings are to be safe. It's probably overkill. Please message me if you have any questions or concerns. Hitcount: Story Total: 353343; Chapter Total: 3530 Awards: View Trophy Room Author's Notes: |
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To Al’s utter shock, Jacob was able to produce a thin, wispy Patronus the very first time he tried. He stared down at the first year with his mouth hanging open. “That’s…” “Stunning,” Andrew filled in for Al. “You have to think of something really happy,” Al said and tried not to blush as he thought of his own happy memory, which happened to be flying with Nat sitting on the broom in front of him. He’d never admit that to anyone. They worked on it for another ten minutes, but without a very happy memory, Jacob couldn’t manage to get more than smoke from his wand. “We’ll have to think of a memory for you,” Al said and smiled confidently for the kid. “It’s still excellent and you can keep practicing it.” “What do you want to learn?” Nat asked and Jacob shrugged. One of the Ravenclaws took over then and started asking him questions to figure out what it was he knew and where he was short. It was a start. They all went to bed that night with a hope for a better next day. Things seemed to settle down in the castle but only if they worked with Jacob every single day. Rose set up a schedule for the students to work with him so they each had a chance to go to Quidditch practices, perform Prefect duties, attend classes, and other activities which ate up most of their free time. They managed to keep it up for weeks as they sped through to their first Hogsmeade weekend. To Al’s utter amazement, he learned more from Jacob than he ever thought he managed to teach the kid. Jacob had a way of doing magic which seemed to be almost a dance of innate knowledge merged with utter confidence. Al learned to refine his moves and to sharpen his understanding of concepts because when Jacob didn’t understand something, he seemed to have a knack of asking the exact right question to make Al think and reevaluate. Every single one of the students helping Jacob said the same thing. One consequence of it was all of them were doing better in their classes. “This isn’t all bad, then,” Al said to Nat and Scorpius as he ate breakfast before their Quidditch match. “No, I agree,” Scorpius said as he cut up his sausage. “Is Rose okay?” “She’s fine,” Nat assured him. “James has been on her about the game since she had that injury in practice last week. The scouts will be here today, so he’s anxious for it to go well.” “I dunno why he’s so worried,” Al told her. “He’s absolutely set to make it onto a team.” Al was right, of course. Their game was a good one, including a spectacular catch of the Snitch by their new Seeker, Amy, a tiny third-year girl with corn-yellow hair and an impish smile which made Al think of his mother. She was quite a good flier and she’d snatched the Snitch right from under the foot of the Slytherin Keeper. Al cheered with the rest of his team as they met on the field to lift Amy onto their shoulders. “Party!” Louis called to the students. “I’ll be there shortly,” James said as a group of adult wizards made their way to him on the field. Al saw all of them appeared quite impressed. Well, they would be. James was an excellent captain, and a team player, but even they couldn’t have noticed to fail he could score a goal from practically halfway down the pitch. He had quite an arm on him. Caroline, who had been drifting on the outside of the group, moved over to James and bumped up onto her toes to kiss his cheek. “See you in a bit.” Al grinned at his brother and then herded the rest of the house back towards the castle. He kept his fingers crossed for his brother, but really it wasn’t as though they had any doubt. “Life is moving on,” Nat said as they stood by the table laden with food. Parties were much easier with Nat around. She simply had to call the elves and food appeared. “What do you mean?” Al asked as he dipped a carrot into some dip before popping it into his mouth. He bypassed the biscuits with her to get a plate of the healthier snacks. Nat stopped and turned to him, staring up at him in a way that his stomach flipping over in a funny way. Her eyes were alight with something he couldn’t quite understand. “You don’t have to eat like I do.” Ah. She’d noticed. He was hoping she wouldn’t. “It’s better for me.” “You don’t want to give up the sweets,” Nat said as her gaze finally slipped from his. “You should enjoy them.” Al patted his flat stomach, something he not really realized had been a problem until it was gone. “This is thanks to eating like you do. Plus, I’ve grown a bunch!” “Like you needed to be more handsome,” Nat grumbled under her breath and Al felt a spring of hope surge up in him until she deflated it with her next words. “You have all the girls fawning over you this year. You’ll have yourself a girlfriend before you know it.” Al shifted uncomfortably and wished he knew how to make his heart settle. It was Nat he wanted to date, but she was determined to set him up and he was starting to fear it was because she knew he had a crush on her. He tried so hard not to let his feelings show. He tried to keep himself neutral so she wouldn’t end up pushing him away. Not for the first time he wondered if he shouldn’t just go with someone to Hogsmeade just so she would stop suspecting his feelings. But honestly, he couldn’t work up the energy to manage it. “There’s a Hogsmeade weekend coming up,” Nat went on what appeared to be forced cheerfulness. “You should ask someone.” “There isn’t anyone I want to ask,” Al muttered as his spirits sank even further until it didn’t feel like they’d won the Quidditch match. “We’ll just go together.” “Rose is going with Hal,” Nat told him. “Andrew is going with Ryan.” Stunned, he stopped in his tracks. “You’re serious?” His cousin was going to Hogsmeade with a Slytherin? “Hal is really nice,” she explained as if he hadn’t noticed it himself. Still, he’d have to take a closer look at the bloke to see if he really was as nice as he thought. Then the other thing Nat had said struck him. “Wait! Wait!!” he pulled her over to the side of the common room, nearly upsetting her plate of food. “Andrew is going with Ryan? Ryan Jordan?!” “Mhmm,” Nat went on as she glanced away. “I was thinking maybe you had a thing for her so I wanted to warn you.” Al’s mouth fell open. “I…” he spluttered and then laughed, shaking his head. “No, absolutely not. Ry and I have only been friends.” He had, admittedly, thought her older sister Alex was really pretty when he was younger, but he’d long since moved on from it. However, he must have been blushing because Nat was giving him a funny look. “Listen,” he went on. “You, me, and Scorpius will go hang out in Hogsmeade.” “Scorpius is on Jacob duty that day,” she reminded him. “He volunteered to take a shift while the rest of us go to the village.” “Well, just you and me then,” he said and then had a horrible thought. “I mean… uh… unless you have a date, too.” Nat snorted and walked away in a huff, leaving Al extremely confused. ~*~ James felt like he was floating on air. He could not believe what had happened and might not believe it for the next fifteen years. He made it into the common room and although several people peppered him to tell them what happened, it was Caroline he moved to. He took her hand and pulled her to her feet, leading her to the portrait hole with her dog plodding along behind them and out until they found an empty classroom and he’d closed the door behind him. “Well?” she asked hesitantly. James couldn’t form the words as he pulled her against him and held on tight. He sincerely hoped he was telling her news which mattered for their future together, but he didn’t know what the future was going to look like. “They’ve invited me to try for England.” “What?!” Caroline gasped in astonishment. Getting onto one of the teams was one thing, but getting to try for the national team was on another level altogether. “You’re serious?” He could only nod, feeling the silky strands of her hair against his cheek. “The other teams said if I didn’t make the national team, I have a guaranteed spot on their reserves, with a chance to try for the main team. But right now, I have an invitation.” It wasn’t an open process, James reminded himself. He had to have an invitation to even be considered. His parents were going to be thrilled. “But the national team means I’d be traveling a lot.” “So would one of the regional teams,” Caroline reminded him. “But it means more time away from you,” he said knowing she wouldn’t want to travel around with him. She didn’t respond. “We have to talk about this,” he said simply. “I don’t want to be away from you.” “But this is your dream–” “You’re my dream,” he interrupted her, reminding her it was true as he pressed a gentle kiss to her temple. “This… this is about us. I can always move up to the national team later, but going back down is more complicated.” He felt her shoulders begin to shake. “I don’t know…” “I know you don’t,” James assured her. “I didn’t expect this and I don’t have to decide now. The tryouts aren’t until April. We have time to talk about it, and I wouldn’t make the regular team. The main national team had tryouts a few months back. This is only to secure a spot on the reserves.” “I need to sit down,” Caroline said quietly. They moved to sit in chairs facing each other and James kept her hands in his. “This is your life, too. Our lives are together.” They’d talked about this a few times now, but they never made much progress. Truthfully, he would marry her the second they left school if she said it was what she wanted. But he didn’t think she was ready, and he didn’t feel ready. He had money from his parents’ trust fund, but it wasn’t the same as being a man, going out into the world to find a job, and paying his own way. He accepted he would need the trust to buy a home. Because of who he was, he needed a house which could be fortified to withstand attacks. But after that, he wanted to pay his own way. It felt like the right thing to do. All of that meant he needed time to work and save. He could live at home for a while, especially if he was traveling a lot. His parents weren’t going to mind storing his stuff for a year or so, but if he was honest with himself he wanted a home of his own. He was ready to spread his wings and stop relying on his parents for everything. “There’s no pressure to rush anything.” She nodded slowly and glanced down at their joined hands. “I… I don’t want to marry unless I know I can… be with you.” “I get that,” he said as he tried to speak around the lump in his throat. “Even if we never marry, you’re my best friend. I love you. I want to be with you.” “If you’re traveling around, you’ll meet a load of other girls who aren’t nearly so complicated,” Caroline laughed without a single hint of humor. “It won’t matter,” he said simply as he gently squeezed her fingers. “You’re the one for me. That isn’t going to change.” “We’re so young…” “Do you have a single doubt about your feelings for me?” She shut her mouth and then shook her head. She doubted his feelings for her, though. It was always there, in the back of her mind. He ran his fingers along the back of her hand, tracing the delicate lines of her veins. He waited. Finally, Caroline said, “This is what you were meant to do.” He opened his mouth to object, but she held up her hand. “This is your passion, Jamie. If I can’t cope with it, then that’s my problem. You should try for the reserve team for England and see what happens. I’ll figure out what I want to do from there.” He felt something in him relax. “If it doesn’t work for you–” “Stop!” Caroline shook her head and her eyes were determined. “I don’t want to be coddled, James! I want to be strong and able to stand on my own.” Slightly taken aback, James felt a lopsided grin tug at his lips. He glanced down at Rufus, who was snoozing at their feet. “Okay, so maybe not totally on my own,” she admitted with a sigh. James couldn’t help but laugh as he leaned over and gently kissed her. “If you need him to stand up for yourself, then who cares? Think of how you were a few years ago! You’re doing really well.” She nodded and then sat up straight. “I’m certain. You get on a team and then we’ll figure out what life will look like. The travel isn’t year round, right?” “No, they have a season. Training is in the fall and winter, then the games leading up to the World Cup are spring to summer. Training will be in England,” James explained. He hesitated a moment before he asked, “Have you figured out what you want to do after school?” She shrugged and glanced away. It had been a sore spot for her, as nothing to do with the Ministry had sounded appealing. She could work in a shop or for Gringotts but not with Rufus tagging along and she was likely to panic without the dog there. “Uncle George said–” “I know,” she interjected quickly. “He won’t mind me bringing the dog in and I can work there, but I’m just not sure it’s the best situation for me. I’ll start applying once I get closer to the end of the year.” She had her grandparents to rely on, and of course him. She didn’t need to push it to find a job which wouldn’t suit her. “Alright,” he said and grinned. “I was thinking of house-hunting over the Christmas hols. Want to come along?” Her mouth dropped open. “Are you serious?” He nearly said that yes, he was Sirius, but decided against it. “It will give my dad and uncles time to fiddle with the security all they want. I really want to be living on my own.” Her cheeks turned pink as she glanced away. “You don’t need my help.” James tried to hide his feelings. Part of him was disappointed she didn’t want to be involved, but he doubted it was that straight forward. “I want you to love the house I pick.” When her cheeks turned even redder, he grinned. “What?” “Nothing!” “I do not believe you.” She bit her lip and chewed on it for a moment until Rufus raised his head and snuffed his nose in her direction. She blew out a breath and shook her head, her blonde hair brushing her face. “I… I was think… about… sharing it with you.” He was thinking about sharing it with her, as well, but blushing wasn’t his primary reaction. James cleared his throat. “That’s the goal, right? That’s what I want.” “I know.” “Is it what you want?” The silence hung heavy between them for a long minute. Finally, she nodded once and then buried her face in her hands. “Part of me wants to and the other part of me is revolted to think about ever doing that again!” He really didn’t want to be hurt by what she said, so he made the choice not to take it personally. There were a lot of times he had taken what she’d said to heart, but as his mother was apt to point out to him, he said the worst things in his head to the people he loved and trusted the most, namely his mother, and if she took it personally they’d have no relationship at all. “There’s no pressure to do anything but stay friends. I’m going to push for that much.” She grinned then and leapt up, throwing her arms around his neck and nearly knock him and his chair backwards. “I love you, Jamie!” “I love you, too.” ~*~ Thunk Al cracked an eye open for a moment, but there wasn’t any light peeking through the tower windows, just the howling, raging wind. Not time to get up… no Quidditch today... blizzard… in late November. Even James couldn’t argue that the Quidditch cup was worth playing in five feet of snow. Whatever that noise was, it was wasn’t worth waking up for. “Where is it…” a soft female whisper came from the end of his bed. All right, maybe it was worth waking up for, Al mused. This was the boys’ dorm room, after all. He raised his head up a bit and squinted through sleep caked eyes. He’d been up most of the night reviewing for a potions exam and didn’t want to be awake. A tiny crack of light illuminated a familiar strawberry blonde head which was currently digging through the trunk at the foot of his bed. “Got it!” Natalie whispered triumphantly, pulling out one of his old Weasley sweaters. She yanked it over her head and looked up, noticing him staring blurrily at her. It looked ludicrous on her tiny frame, almost like she was being engulfed by a large navy-blue bear. In fact, if he squinted one eye… “Go back to bed, Al. It’s early.” She snatched something off the floor, turned and walked softly from the room, closing the door behind her with almost no sound. Al let his head thump back onto his pillow, trying to make sense of what he’d just seen and deciding it didn’t really matter anyway. “Al?” Scorpius muttered. “Did Nat just come in and nick one of your sweaters?” “Uh huh,” Al said, rolling onto his side. Scorpius sighed. “All right, I’m not hallucinating.” There was a long moment of silence before he drawled, “Do you have any idea why?” “She probably thought that I wouldn’t say ‘no’ if I was asleep.” “Ah, yeah,” Scorpius said, yawning hugely. “That’s make sense if you ever said ‘no’ to her in the first place. You don’t even need a girlfriend to nick your clothes. Your best friend does it for you.” Realizing that sleep wasn’t going to come back now, Al stretched and sat up. “It doesn’t even come close to fitting her. I’m more than a head taller than she is and at least five stones heavier.” “Girls never make sense,” Scorpius agreed. “Shut up!” one of their dorm mates grumbled. A light cracked into the room from the stairs as the door swung open again. “Oh,” Nat began. “I didn’t mean to wake you up. Go back to sleep.” Al gave her a bland stare as he scraped his hands over his cheeks, trying to rub off the last vestiges of sleep. “Why’d ya nick my sweater?” “I’m cold,” she said, giving him an odd look as if that should explain everything. She moved back over to his trunk. “What’s wrong with your sweaters?” “I have one of mine on, Al. I wanted to layer them so I needed a bigger one.” She began rummaging through his trunk again. “There’s a blizzard out there and it’s freezing in the common room even with the fire blazing.” Al stood and walked over to look at what she was doing, noting with a shiver that she was right. It was wickedly cold out of his warm bed. “Now what?” She stood, triumphantly holding up a pair of his thick, woolen socks. “Found them,” she said happily, quietly closing the lid to sit and pull them on over her other socks. They went all the way up to her knees, before she pulled her pants back over them. “Much better,” Nat said happily, wiggling her feet. “You two getting up then?” “Nat,” Al began and then gave up with a sigh. She was so cute, swamped as she was in his clothes. Who really cared if she took them? “Yeah, we’re getting up. Now get out so I can get dressed.” “No stealing any of my clothes!” Scorpius called from his pillow, vaguely waving a hand at her. “Too late,” Nat said as she walked towards the door. “I raided your trunk earlier for Rose before going through Al’s.” The door clicked shut. Scorpius groaned. Al grinned and looked over at Scorpius who rolled his eyes before asking, “Why are we friends with them again?” Al shrugged and started to dig out what was left of his warm clothing. “They don’t smell bad if they forget to shower and they never eat the last piece of bacon.” His best mate snorted. “Right, as long as we’ve got good reasons.” Al grinned and headed for the bathroom. “Only the best.” Five minutes later Al and Scorpius trudged down into the common room and towards the fires where Rose and Nat sat studying. “It’s not even six o’clock!” Al grumbled as he flopped into the seat next to Nat, while Scorpius sat with Rose across from them. “This is a big test,” Rose reminded them. “We need the study time.” Al shivered as a large gust of wind shook the tower and spewed in cold air. He crossed his arms over his chest. He turned at a noise from the stairs and saw his sister, her shoulders hunched, about to head up the boys stairs. “Oi! What are you doing?” Lily gave him a grumpy look. Unfortunately for Lily, even when she tried to look grumpy it came off as adorable. “I’m going to get a sweater from your trunk.” “What is it with you girls?” Scorpius asked incredulously. “Nat already raided my trunk,” Al informed her staring pointedly at Nat. She studiously ignored him. Lily yawned and went up the stairs. “No problem, I’ll get one from James.” Al turned back to the group and the thought of a memory flashed in his head. “You know, that’s how my mum told my dad she was pregnant with James.” “Come again?” Nat finally looked up at him. “I remember that story!” Rose piped in with a laugh. “See, Uncle Harry started to put on one of his old sweaters…” Al sat back and grinned as his cousin told the story of his mum telling his dad the sweater was hers as she’d need bigger ones while pregnant. He glanced over to Nat and his face fell at the intense look of pain in her eyes. She stared down at the book in her lap and didn’t once glance up. If he hadn’t known any better, he’d have said she was about to burst into tears. “Rose,” Al cut his cousin off. “What?” Rose asked, and then her gaze tracked over to Nat and she fell silent. An awkward moment fell between them as the fire hissed and popped and the wind screamed a raging tantrum outside. “Sorry,” Nat said quietly, breaking the silence. “Let’s… let’s get back to work.” They were interrupted by Lily bouncing back into the common room, bundled up in one of James’ sweaters, an annoyed frown on her face. She sat herself in one of the armchairs and curled her legs up under the sweater as she glared at the fire. “Why are you awake?” Rose asked, trying to break the tension. “I had a bad dream,” Lily told them with a long, painful sigh. “It woke me up and every time I closed my eyes I kept seeing this… this dark place. It scared me.” Al shifted his focus from Nat over to his sister, studying her carefully. “What about it scared you?” “I don’t know,” she admitted slowly as the light of the fire cast shadows on her pale skin. It made her freckles stand out even more. “Ever since we figured out I was the target–” “You don’t know that for sure,” Al interjected immediately. “We know, Al,” Lily said soberly. “We know Crabbe is going to come after me.” “We’re also watching out for you,” Scorpius reminded her fervently. “We’re going to protect you.” “I know,” Lily said as she leaned her head back against the back of the armchair. “I know I shouldn’t be afraid, but I am. I think the dark room is my fear of her.” “How often are you having this dream?” Rose asked as she shifted in her seat, pulling her own feet up under her. “At least once a week,” Lily told her, sighing again. “At least… sometimes more. I am stuck in a dark room, unable to move or cry out. I can’t feel anything, but I can sense someone standing in the corner, watching me and it… it makes me feel horrible and sick.” Al stood up and moved to her, kneeling in front of her and putting his hands on her arms. “We’re not going to let anyone get you.” She smiled and moved until she was hugging him hard. “I have the best brothers. I trust you.” ~*~ “The boys are getting ridiculous,” Lily grumbled. Nat glanced over her shoulder and frowned. She’d been about to put away her clothes in the dresser at the Potter’s when Lily spoke. “What?” She hadn’t noticed the boys doing anything too out of the ordinary. “What did they do?” “Not my brothers,” Lily waved it off. “Or… well, you can’t tell them just yet, okay?” “Okay,” Nat agreed cautiously. “What am I agreeing with?” “So,” Lily said as she flopped back on Nat’s bed, which was the lower bunk in Lily’s room. “I had three boys ask me to Hogsmeade just before the hols.” Nat blinked. “I mean, you knew you were going to be beautiful.” “I did,” Lily agreed carefully. “I knew it was going to happen. I saw my picture, the one where you aged me up some, and I could see it. But I just didn’t realize what it was going to be like.” “What is it like?” Nat wondered. No one had ever been interested in Nat and she’d never been asked to Hogsmeade. She didn’t want to feel jealous of Lily. It wasn’t Lily’s fault she was beautiful and Lily had heeded Nat’s warning that she could be beautiful on the outside, but ugly on the inside. Lily was an angel. She was so sweet. “It has happened a bunch this year,” Lily admitted. “It was happening a bit last year, too, but less so because I think everyone is afraid of my brothers and cousins. So they ask me out, and I politely decline after telling them I just want to be friends.” “That doesn’t sound too bad,” Nat said thoughtfully. Lily shook her head. “Most of the boys are okay with it. Most of them say okay and that’s that, but some of them are starting to act like I owe them a date! Some of them are getting… well, getting mean about it.” “Mean how?” Nat asked sharply. “Maybe we should tell Al and James.” “Mean like… like glaring at me or refusing to talk to me anymore,” Lily sighed. “All these boys want to date me. I had one try to kiss me! But I want my first kiss to be special.” “No one wants to kiss me,” Nat told her and then snapped her mouth shut. “Sorry… this is about you, and not me.” “Oh, Nat,” Lily sprang up and threw her arms around her. “I’m sorry! I must sound so petty, complaining about this.” “No,” Nat assured her. “It’s bothering you so I’m glad you told me. I think we need to tell your brothers.” “I’ll think about it,” Lily said non-committedly. “I don’t want to worry them more than I already am.” Nat didn’t think that was such a good idea, but she’d keep it quiet for now. It would keep the Christmas hols more peaceful, anyway. “I don’t think anyone will ever want to kiss me.” If Nat could have smacked herself without looking stupid, she would have! She couldn’t believe she’d blurted that out when Lily had been simply asking for support! Lily touched her cheek and shook her head. “You don’t know that. Some day someone will.” Nat seriously doubted it, but she let it go. This was about Lily and not her. “Some day you’ll find a bloke you want to say yes to.” Lily’s smile was rueful. “I hope so.” ~*~ “You’re serious?” James glanced over at Caroline and grinned at the look of stunned admiration on her face. “Like it?” “It’s huge!” she said as her mouth hung open. “It is a bit much for one bloke,” Louis agreed. James turned to his father who was studying the house with interest. It was a modern house with a lot of stone and interesting angles. It was set back in the woods away from everything else, had an outbuilding with an indoor pool, and a huge garage for several cars. “It has good potential. We can definitely make this work,” Harry told his son. “It’s going to cost a fortune!” Caroline hissed and James shrugged. He had a fortune to spend on a house, so he didn’t really care. He wanted to be happy with the house and he didn’t want to be moving around a lot. He’d always had a home and he’d always been stable. He wanted that to continue. “James…” she breathed out his name. “Do you like it?” he asked her quietly. “Well, I haven’t seen the inside!” she huffed out. The inside was just as spacious as the outside had promised. It had one bedroom on the main floor and four on the second story. This house, unlike most, had a fully finished cellar. The living room flowed into the dining room which flowed into a large kitchen with an island. The backyard was huge with a lot of open lawn, bordered by acres of trees. “It was owned by a French businessman,” Harry said as they wandered through the space which echoed with their steps. “Now is a good time to buy, too. It’s been on the market eight months and few people move in January.” “Come on,” James said as he took Caroline around the rooms again, keeping her hand firmly in his. “We’ve looked at a lot of houses,” he said as he stepped into the largest bedroom and pulled her over to the large double doors which opened onto an atrium. “Look at the snow,” he said as they stood in the glassed in room and studied the backyard. “I like this one…” she said slowly. “Like it forever?” he asked her carefully. She took in a deep breath. “We can keep looking over the Easter hols,” he reminded her. They were going back to school in two days and they’d run out of time to look at more. She shook her head. “I love this house.” He laughed. “I love it, too.” “You can really afford this place?” she wondered quietly. “I have the gold on hand,” he confirmed. It would eat up much of what his parents had set aside for him, but he’d be earning a good living with Quidditch. “Okay,” she said with a nod. “Let’s do this.” ~*~ Scorpius walked slowly over to where she sat with her feet up in the alcove, looking out the window onto the frozen ground below. February had been just as brutal as every other month. A lump formed in Scorpius’ throat as his feet moved without his conscious effort. He’d seen her upset and couldn’t stop himself from following. He wanted to stop. He knew that these feelings he had for Lily were only going to get him in trouble but he couldn’t seem to help himself. He was seventeen! She wouldn’t be fifteen for another few months. But there was something there, something about her, and it was drawing him in like a moth to a flame. He didn’t have a good sense of self-preservation. That was all he could come up with. He wanted to die. Harry Potter would kill him. Al would kill him. He must have a death wish. But he needed to make her feel better. There was nothing else but that simple fact. “Lily?” She glanced over at him, her beautiful tear stained face awash in misery. “Hey.” He sat on the ledge next to her feet. “What happened?” He didn’t really need to ask. He knew what had happened. Scorpius had stopped long enough to tell Al, James and Louis so that they could take care of the berk before he’d gone to find her. He’d wanted to break the boy in half for what he’d done to her, but more than that he wanted to find Lily and be absolutely sure she was okay. “Nothing…” Lily whispered, drawing her knees up further and resting her forehead on her denim-clad knees. Her long, beautiful red hair spilled around her as if to shield her. “What did he say to you?” Scorpius probed gently, tentatively reaching out a hand to brush her hair back a bit. It was softer than he could have imagined. It almost burned to touch her again. He wanted to so badly, but he made himself hold back. She looked up and embarrassment stained her cheeks. “You saw?” “Yeah,” he admitted, not adding that he watched her more than he should. “Your brothers are taking care of him.” “Oh,” she closed her big brown eyes and dropped her head again. “This is awful.” “Tell me what happened, Lils,” Scorpius asked again. “What did he say?” “He…” her voice trembled. “He told me that I was a tease.” Rage filled him so fast that he had to clench his fists and bite his lip, trying to regain control. “That’s… that’s not true.” “It is true!” Lily said pitifully. “I didn’t mean for it to be this way, but… Nat told me that I was going to be beautiful years ago. She… she also told me that beauty is as beauty does and that if I wasn’t a nice person that it wouldn’t matter what my face looked like.” Her watery brown eyes met his. “I thought it would be great! I’d have boys at my feet and… I didn’t really understand what that meant until it started to happen. I tried to be kind, but I couldn’t be with them because none of them knew me. They just saw my face and they only wanted my face!” Scorpius nodded. He’d been afraid that was what was happening to him too, even though he’d known and liked Lily as a person since she was nine when there was nothing but childhood friendship between them. But she was extraordinarily beautiful as well and only growing more so every day. “What happened today?” “He… I heard him saying to his mates that he wanted to bag the prettiest girl in the school,” Lily sobbed. Bile rose up in Scorpius’ throat. He couldn’t stop himself this time. He stood and wrapped her gently in arms. She melted into him and held on. “Why didn’t you hex him?” “I should have,” Lily said through her tears. “I’ve always tried to turn the boys down nicely but him… he came to ask and I knew why he was asking. I told him I’d never go out with him. That’s… that’s when it got ugly.” He cupped her chin and turned her face up to look into his eyes. “You aren’t a tease.” “I’ve never said yes to any of them,” Lily said quietly as she looked at him. “I just couldn’t bring myself to say yes because I couldn’t trust them. I’ve never even kissed anyone.” Scorpius had to close his eyes and fight off the urge to lean down and kiss her himself. He wouldn’t do it, though. His feelings for her ran too deep and had only been growing. She wasn’t interested in him and if she was, she wasn’t ready for this step. He wasn’t going to risk hurting her. When he opened his eyes again he managed a small smile. “That isn’t such a big thing, Lily. It isn’t like you’re ancient or anything.” “But lots of boys want to kiss me,” she said miserably. None of this made her happy. “I didn’t realize what that was going to be like and it’s starting to get to me. Nat hasn’t kissed anyone either and she… she said to me a few weeks ago that she expected to go through life without anyone wanting to kiss her. I felt so awful and petty for being annoyed at all these boys when she’d be happy if just one boy paid attention to her.” Scorpius knew that Nat did have a boy that wanted to kiss her, she just didn’t realize it. “It’s okay to want to be sure that a boy really likes you for you. Your mum is beautiful, too. How did she deal with all the boys?” “She’s sort of a hex first and ask questions later person,” Lily said with a small, watery giggle. “I used to want to be as beautiful as her.” “You’re already more beautiful,” Scorpius said and was shocked at how low his voice sounded. Lily pulled back and looked at him in surprise. “You think so?” “Definitely,” he promised meeting her gaze levelly. He watched the shift of expressions, the confusion and maybe understanding as they played over her face. “Are you ready to go back and face the world?” She nodded and hopped down. “I don’t want to face that boy, though.” “You won’t have to,” he assured her as he slung an arm around her shoulders, trying to keep it friendly. “By now he’s in the hospital wing.” |
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