Sometimes I wonder if I'm
Ever gonna make it home again
It's so far and out of sight
I really need someone to talk to
And nobody else
Knows how to comfort me tonight
Snow is cold, rain is wet
Chills my soul right to the marrow
I won't be happy 'til I see
You alone again
'Til I'm home again and feelin' right
- Home Again, Carole King
Lily found herself on the end of a cliff. Strong winds whipped her, and her hair hurricained around her face. Weeds and tall grass buffeted her legs. As she pulled her hair behind her ears, she was finally able to see that it wasn’t just a cliff, but a long crevasse. Just about fifty feet away was the other side of the cliff. And on that other side-
She gasped. On the other side was a small child. All alone, and holding a little toy wolf, just like Harry’s. The boy looked as she imagined Harry might, in a few years. Big shiny eyes that mirrored her own, James’ wild hair dancing in the wind. He cried - but not for help. He simply cried, as if mourning a loss. She wanted to help, to get his attention, but she could not move. She tried to shout, but could not open her mouth. The anger built within her, seeming to shake the ground under her feet.
But no, the ground was really shaking. An earthquake?
Lily was shaken awake in a somewhat aggressive manner. It was Sirius, not an earthquake at all. She was back in the holding cell at the Ministry, and the boy was nowhere to be seen.
“Wha…what’s happening?” She sat up straight, and her neck, back, and hips protested with a vengeance. Turns out, sleeping on concrete benches may not be exactly what the doctor ordered for an exhausted mum. Lily stretched her arms above her head, and nearly moaned from the relief the little pops from her spine gave.
“Look alive, Evans,” Sirius muttered as he readjusted her giggling son to sit on his thigh. “We’ve got company.”
Lily looked past her old friend, and with a jolt, realized he was right. The Man from yesterday morning was in the doorway, looking pale and sweaty, and holding a large manila envelope. Him, with James’ uncontrollable hair, her father’s eyes, and her mother’s nose. The one the patronus had called, ‘Potter.’ The one the woman had called, ‘Harry.’
James was between Him and their little group in a flash. Her husband was jittery, and his right hand seemed to grasp around for his missing wand, like a child reaching for something to hold onto while learning to walk. Sirius attempted a steadying hand on his shoulder, but James smacked it away, never taking his eyes from The Man.
“Er, hello,” The Man choked out, taking a cautious step into the room. “Lovely to see you again.” His mouth quivered in a half-smile.
The silence that met his almost-joke was deafening, and Lily caught herself feeling some pity for the poor man. He was clearly about as well-rested as any of them were. His anxiety reeked from every pore. It was a completely different picture than the one they’d been presented with yesterday, and she couldn’t help but see a bit of herself in the way His green eyes flitted from person to person, seeking reassurance.
“Thank you all for your cooperation yesterday. I hope they didn’t give you too hard of a time-”
“Thought I was at the Ritz, to be honest,” Sirius drawled, interrupting Him. “Except, I s’pose the Ritz might not have such comfortable beds.”
The Man laughed: a short, surprised sound, and it took a moment for Him to respond.
“Well, good news is, tonight should be a bit better. You’re going to be coming…to my house. With me. Coming home.” He wiped his open palm on his trousers, and the envelope began to look very wrinkled.
After a beat, it seemed that their uneasy silence was not quite the reaction he had been anticipating. An awkward smile flitted across his face, and it was so very James, that she nearly laughed out loud. But she couldn’t, of course. She had learned the hard way not to take everything at face value. There was a war on, after all.
Seeming to take pity on him, Sirius let a warm smile spread over his handsome features. “Not that we don’t appreciate the offer, but just why would we be going home with you? I wouldn’t expect to find a chapter on ‘inviting suspects ‘round for tea’ in the Auror handbook.”
“Ah,” He responded delicately. Taking in their various positions around the room, He jerkily gestured to the bench that Lily was sitting on. “You may want to be sitting down.”
Sirius joined Lily on the bench with a quick nod, but Remus remained curled up in the same corner he’d claimed last night. Lily took a moment to take a good look at him as Sirius tried to coax James into sitting with them. Remus had been paler than usual since they got to the Ministry, and Lily couldn’t remember the last time she’d heard him speak. His eyes were a bit vacant, as if he wasn’t completely connected to the world around him. She made a mental note to check in with him once they were left alone.
Speaking of which, The Man was now watching with interest as James and Sirius finally reached a compromise. James agreed to at least stand beside Sirius, rather than between Him and them (“James, mate, I love you, but I’m not spending this whole conversation staring at your arse,”) as long as He agreed to sit as well, to even the playing field. The Man raised his hands in surrender, and lightly dropped his weight onto the concrete bench opposite them.
“So,” He began with a heavy breath. “I suppose it was, what? 1981, when you left? Actually, I’m… I’m getting ahead of myself. I should start here: I don’t know if it was intentional or not, but you’ve traveled through time.”
A low buzzing filled Lily’s ears. Seeing the boys were likewise in various stages of shock, she asked faintly, “Which way?”
“…Which? Oh, sorry, forward. In the, uh, the future,” He chuckled. “Sorry, that does seem like vital information, actually. The year is 2019, so I suppose that’s thirty-eight years forward?”
“Oh…kay. Sure,” Sirius said, forcing his face into neutrality. Lily could see that his careful facade of carelessness was beginning to crack in the face of this new information. He continued, “So, why are you asking us to go to your house, then?”
The Man stared at him for a beat, and then looked around at the rest of them incredulously.
“Oh, well obviously…sorry, terribly rude of me, I guess I’m a bit used to people knowing who I am. I, uh, well, because I’m…him,” he finished with a helpless gesture towards the baby in Sirius’ arms.
As Lily tried to absorb the implications behind his words, a sharp, high laugh interrupted the shock settling into her skin.
“That’s what you’re going with? We’ve time traveled into the future, which is nearly impossible to do without killing yourself, and you’re supposed to be Harry, all grown up?” The terrible, crazed laugh ripped from James’ mouth once more.
The Man blinked at him dumbly. “Well…yes?”
James scoffed dramatically, seeming ready for a fight. Harry cut him off before he could begin.
“Look, I didn’t want to believe it either. But we’ve done every test in the Aurors’ arsenal, and the results are all the same. We’ve even done Muggle DNA tests,” He gestured desperately with the envelope. “You are who you say you are. And I, unfortunately, am who I say I am. So the only logical conclusion is time travel.”
Sirius’ eyes narrowed. “Unfortunately?”
The Man scoffed nervously. “Bad joke, but I am…me. I’m Harry Potter.” He lifted a hand to his forehead, and seemed to change course to wipe his nose at the last second.
“And I suppose you think we’re stupid enough to believe you, with no proof whatsoever?” James examined Him with disdain.
“To be completely honest…I hadn’t thought that far ahead.” He laughed as the realization of the truth of his statement swept over him. Lily’s heart sank into her stomach. Try as she might, her heart was beginning to win the battle against her mind.
“Surely that’s enough proof for you, James?” Sirius smirked at his best friend. Her son fussed a little bit, and she gently took him from Sirius in order to calm him. She was reminded of the previous night, before any of this happened.
James only growled at Sirius in response.
“What’s my favorite song?” Lily spoke up suddenly.
“I…uh,” Harry gulped, looking to Sirius for help.
“Nevermind, I bet my favorite song’s changed a million times since now,” she interrupted, absentmindedly smoothing her son’s wild hair. “Then. Whatever.”
“Yeah,” Harry said distantly.
“Where did I grow up, then? I don’t think that would be information everyone would know,” she said, grasping at straws.
Harry inhaled quickly, eyes darting for a moment. “Cokeworth,” he breathed triumphantly.
“Ooh, I like this game! Alright, what’s James’ team?” Sirius asked, eyes alight.
“His…team?” Harry stuttered.
“Yeah, his Quidditch team. You know, the one he never bloody shuts up about?”
Harry thought for a moment, and the room was deathly quiet. “My first thought is Gryffindor, but I think that’s not what you’re looking for here.” Harry paused, long enough to make James sigh in annoyance.
“Puddlemere,” he finally said quietly.
After a beat, James scoffed. “Lucky guess.”
Sirius rolled his eyes. Harry shrugged, his eyes on the ground.
“How do I take my tea?” Lily questioned gently.
He looked taken aback, and the silence stretched uncomfortably. Lily could see that he was far, far away. Despite everything, she wanted nothing more in that moment than to comfort him. The time stretched until it became obvious he had no answer.
“Mate, you’ve got to admit that you’re not doing a great job at convincing us,” Sirius said with a kind, gentle laugh. “A scheme like this takes a little research!”
Harry swiped his hand down his face, taking in a deep breath. “No, it’s not a…it’s just been a while that you’ve been gone. So I don’t…remember everything about you. Kids don’t know everything about their parents.”
“Mum took a little cream and one sugar cube. Dad drank his black. I’ll remember that until the day I die,” said James, acid dripping from every word. “That doesn’t change just because they’re gone.”
Harry met his stony gaze with a look that seemed both surprised and sorrowful. Their eyes locked for a moment, before Harry finally responded slowly, his voice thick.
“I can prove it. I have..the cloak. Well, my son has the cloak, actually.”
“Thatta boy, Harry,” Sirius said with a genuine smile. “Who’s the unlucky girl?”
Harry finally tore his gaze from his father’s, and seemed to relax for the first time since entering the room. He smiled, and his smile was James’ smile.
“I’d tell you, but to be honest, I don’t think you’ll know her. Not sure if she’s been born yet,” he replied. This elicited a bark-like laugh from Sirius.
“Oh, our boy’s a cradle robber, Prongsie! I knew-”
“Show it to us, then,” James demanded, standing suddenly. The laughter on Harry’s lips died out, and he looked to each of them in turn. Lily gave him a small encouraging smile as their eyes met. He finally stood, and nodded solemnly.
“Right. Then to Potter Manor we go.”
Harry truly could not remember the last time he’d felt this nervous. Terrified for his life? Vibrating with adrenaline in the middle of a battle? Angrier than was probably good for his blood pressure? Yes, yes, and absolutely yes; these were just natural byproducts of his chosen profession, and of being a parent. But truly nervous, anxious for someone else’s approval? This was not a feeling Harry had ever become accustomed to. Which, of course, made him even more nervous.
After a brief explanation to Auror Blackwell (he didn’t have the patience for Flanders, not now that he knew the truth), he got the small group released, and led them into his office. He had never been more grateful for the fact he had a private fireplace. As they each grabbed a pinch of floo powder, he felt a bit like he was having an out of body experience. Somehow, he had never imagined his parents doing something as mundane as using the Floo.
They stumbled through one by one, with Harry bringing up the rear. This turned out to be rather unfortunate, as Ginny was on the other end, her wand outstretched and crackling. Before even dusting himself off, he rushed to stand between her and the group.
“Gin! I should have said something before we got here, I’m so sorry.”
She aimed at his heart. “Al’s middle name should have been…?”
“Fred, obviously. I’ll never live that one down, eh?” Harry said, sheepishly. “My tattoo is?”
“Nonexistent, because you’re too indecisive. I still vote for a Hippogriff sleeve.” Ginny carefully lowered her wand, and her eyes melted as she truly looked at him for the first time since his return.
“So,” she said delicately, taking a long glance at the group behind him.
“So,” Harry breathed. “There have been some updates since yesterday.”
“I see. And you’re deathly sure?” Harry smiled faintly at the use of the phrase Jamie had coined as a little boy, which had wiggled its way into their everyday speech.
“The deathliest,” he answered, reaching out for her hand. She rushed to meet him, taking his hand in both of hers. He turned back to face the group gathered, and it almost knocked him over to see them standing there in his living room. His mum was studying the pictures on the mantel, pretending not to listen. Sirius was lounging in Harry’s favorite armchair, clearly enjoying the show. While Remus seemed to be finally coming out of his funk, James seemed more closed off than before.
Harry tried to shake it off, reminding himself that there was still work to be done. “Everyone, this is my wife, Ginny. Gin, this is…well, you know. Everyone,” he finished lamely. She squeezed his hand.
“It is absolutely incredible to have you here. Welcome to our home,” said Ginny, with a heartfelt gaze for each of them. She finally looked back at Harry.
“Is this just a visit, or are they staying with us?”
“Staying,” Harry said firmly, “at least for a while. We don’t know the whole story yet, but they’re here now, and that’s a start.”
She gave him a smile that tried to hold back a tidal wave of emotion. “It sure is.”
Just then thundering footsteps could be heard overhead. Ginny gasped.
“The kids are going to lose their minds. How do we want to do this?”
Harry sighed and muttered, “Fuck if I know. I’m taking all of this one second at a time. But that reminds me, is Albus upstairs? I need to borrow the cloak.”
“Dumbledore’s here?” Lily interjected, abandoning all pretense of pretending she hadn’t been listening.
“Oh, no…my son’s name is Albus,” Harry said apologetically.
Sirius barked out a laugh. Harry’s guts twisted. “And how does Dumbledore feel about that?”
“He’s gone,” answered Lily quickly. “Otherwise you wouldn’t have named him Albus.”
Harry nodded solemnly. Lily buried her head in little Harry’s neck mournfully, and Sirius swore. Remus stumbled, though he had been standing still. James glared at him, skeptical as ever.
“Well,” Ginny said, breaking the silence that had fallen, “You’ll actually need to talk to his older brother.”
Harry groaned and closed his eyes. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
Ginny shook her head disapprovingly. “He refuses to give it to Al. I swear, he’s even worse than when we dropped him off.”
“That little…” Harry muttered, and turned abruptly to their captivated audience. Sirius and Remus seemed amused, while James pointedly avoided his gaze. Lily met his eyes with a sad smile.
“Excuse me, I’ll be back in a few minutes,” he said tersely. To Ginny, “In his room?”
She shrugged. “Where else?”
As he stomped up the stairs, he suddenly doubled back. “Gin?”
“Putting the kettle on now, love,” she responded knowingly.
“Ta,” he grunted, whipping back around to climb the stairs. As he turned the corner towards Jamie’s room, he heard her inviting the group to take a seat in the living room. Merlin, but he didn’t know how he would ever live without Ginny.
Once Harry’s wife slipped off into the kitchen, the whispering began.
“It feels so weird to be back here. I haven’t been here since…” Sirius trailed off. His eyes filled, but did not spill over. Lily wished she had a free hand to comfort him.
“I know,” She replied instead, “But it’s good, isn’t it? This place deserves to be lived in. It needs people.” Sirius smiled at her gently, and nodded. She hugged Harry tighter to her, not for the first time mourning the fact that he would never meet his grandparents.
“I like what they’ve done with the place,” said Remus, “I think it’s the first time I’ve ever been allowed to sit in this room.”
Lily agreed internally. The sitting room was cozy, and seemed to have been somewhat inspired by the Gryffindor common room. But instead of dark maroons and golds, the room was filled with light and airy pastel greens, blues, and yellows. It felt clean and welcoming, and very lived-in. What surprised her most was that there were several distinctly muggle touches, like the large television (she supposed it was a television, she’d never seen one that flat before), the electrical cords spouting from evenly spaced outlets, and the mix of moving and still pictures that decorated the walls.
“Oh yeah,” Sirius snickered, regaining his composure. “This was the sitting room that no one was ever allowed in! I completely forgot about that. It was strictly for using the floo only. I swear to Merlin, I’ll never understand why people have entire rooms that no one’s permitted to touch.”
“Enough,” James interrupted harshly. “The good news is, I know all the exits and entrances. We’ll have to be quick and quiet, but we can get out if we can just get to the kitchen.” The three of them snapped their heads to James, memories of the past forgotten.
“Seriously James? You won’t even give them a chance?” Sirius hissed back at him.
James did a double take. “You’re not really buying this, are you?”
“Yeah, I am,” Sirius replied, his face settling in grim determination. “I knew from the moment he sent his patronus at the house. It couldn’t be anyone else. I may not know all the details, but I know that’s my godson. That’s your son, James.”
James growled in frustration. “What about you two?”
Lily sighed. “Well…”
“Lily!” His eyes nearly bulged out of his head.
After a long moment, she finally whispered, “I want to see the cloak.”
“Remus?” James asked desperately.
“He knows what I am and hasn’t killed me yet,” Remus met his gaze and shrugged. “That’s pretty good proof to me.”
James slumped back in his seat, defeated. Lily tried to take his hand, but he snatched it out from under hers. She caught Sirius’ eye. This wasn’t going to be easy.
They sat in silence for a few tense moments before Ginny returned, floating a tea set in front of her.
“Tea and biscuits!” she said cheerfully. “Not the chocolate ones, unfortunately. Those never last long in this house. Now, how does everyone take their tea?”