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Seeking the Truth | ||||||
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Category: Post-OotP Characters:Harry/Ginny, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley Genres: Drama, Fluff Warnings: Death, Sexual Situations Rating: PG-13 Reviews: 364 Summary: *** The author has been reminded via the e-mail address on file that this story is listed as incomplete and has not been updated since 2006 *** **March Dumbledore Silver Trinket Award winner for Best Drama and Best Romance** Ginny Weasley's excited about starting her first real job after finishing school, except for one small thing: she'll have to face Harry Potter for the first time in over a year. Ginny struggles to deal with feelings she thought she had long put behind her, and with figuring out what really happened between Harry and Ron to fuel Ron's sudden hatred of his ex-best mate. Ginny is forced to make the ultimate decision... true love or family loyalty. Hitcount: Story Total: 93804; Chapter Total: 5371 Awards: View Trophy Room |
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The Day After Voldemort’s Defeat Ron Weasley fumed as he made his way to the hospital wing. The last few days had been an emotional rollercoaster. He had discovered his best friend in bed with his girlfriend, and listened helplessly when she had said she didn’t love him anymore. His heart had been broken by his first love; she had thrown away their relationship like it was yesterday’s paper. He felt betrayed by his best friend who had taken his place and roamed about with the said ex-girlfriend. He was destroyed from witnessing the deaths of his eldest brother and mother. He was trying so hard to keep everything in to be strong for his family, but he didn’t know how much more of it he could take. It was only at his father’s insistence that made him go to the hospital wing and try to patch things up with Harry. He knew that Harry had lost as much as anybody–if not more–but he couldn’t help feeling resentful towards him because of the situation with Hermione. When Ron had reached the hospital wing, the last few strands of his sanity broke. He saw Hermione sitting next to Harry’s bed, her hand clasped in his. He heard the words ‘I love you’ leave Harry’s lips. He saw Hermione kiss him and repeat those same three damn words. It was like watching a train wreck; he didn’t want to look but he couldn’t turn away. He was going to turn and leave when he heard Harry call out his name. “Ron, I’m so glad you came,” Harry said quietly, releasing his grasp on Hermione’s hand. “Why? So you could flaunt your new relationship in front of me?” Ron asked angrily. Harry’s face paled. “Or maybe this isn’t so new. How long has this been going on?” “Ron, it’s not like how it looks,” Hermione said calmly. “Didn’t you just profess your love for each other?” Ron snapped. “Not like you think,” Harry began, but Ron cut him off. “How could you do this to me? All this time you were lying to me about your interest in my sister so I wouldn’t notice that you were going after my girlfriend?” “Ron…” “SHUT UP!” Ron screamed. “I don’t want to hear another word out of your murdering mouth! Nothing but evil has come to my family since you entered our lives. You’re the reason why Percy had died without even speaking to his family in almost two years, and you’re the reason why Bill died; it was you who killed my mum, not some Death Eater. In fact, that’s why I came here today; to tell you how much my family hates you.” Silent tears fell down Harry’s face as Ron’s words cut through him like a knife. Ron’s voice went from being loud and full of hurt to quiet and cold. “You’ve ruined my life. I hate you. If you ever come near me or my family again, I’ll kill you with my bare hands.” Ron turned around and left the hospital wing with Hermione hot on his heels. When they reached the hall, Hermione grabbed his arm and pulled him so he had to look in her eyes. “Ronald Weasley, I am ashamed of you!” she screamed. “You’ve just succeeded in completely destroying what was left of your best friend in the entire world.” “Good,” Ron answered calmly. “Now he knows how it feels.” Hermione gaped at him. He grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her. “Tell me you didn’t break up with me for him!” “I didn’t,” Hermione insisted, for the first time in her life fearing the man before her. Ron released his grasp on her and his voice softened. “Then why?” Hermione looked to the ground. She couldn’t find the words. “Just like I thought.” Ron turned around and walked away, leaving Hermione crying alone in the hall. The rest of the weekend was a blur to Ginny. She and Ron were the only ones left in the Burrow with their dad after the dinner Friday night, and although they had reached an understanding on the Harry situation, things were still a little tense. To say that Ginny was looking forward to returning to the manor would have been an understatement. When Ginny arrived back at the place she was coming to regard as home, she was surprised to see Harry sitting in the living room reading a book, looking well-rested. “Hello,” she said with a smile. “What are you reading?” “Nothing anymore,” Harry replied cheekily, marking his place and setting the book down. “I was just trying to kill the time until everyone arrives.” “Waiting for anyone in particular?” she asked, trying to get a look of the title on his book. “Tank, actually. I wanted to talk to him about some things before it got too crazy around here again. How was your weekend?” Harry asked. “Awkward and uncomfortable,” Ginny replied bluntly. “Was Ron upset with you?” Ginny sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “We talked and reached an understanding of sorts.” “Did you try and make things like they used to be?” Harry asked, setting his book down on the coffee table. “Well, no,” Ginny replied, somewhat surprised, as she sat down on the couch opposite Harry. “If you don’t try, how are things ever going to get better?” he pressed. “I guess they’re not…” Ginny looked at Harry and tried to figure out when he had grown up. “Is that what you’re doing with Ron? Trying?” “Touché,” he replied with a grin. “Although I did try before, but Ron wasn’t having any part of it. In fact, neither were you.” Ginny was startled and decided to change the subject. “How was your weekend?” “Fine. My guard and I did some redecorating in my room, we played some games, and I flew a bit,” Harry answered. “Actually, I had a lot of fun.” “Was your guard anyone I’d know?” Ginny asked, twirling a lock of hair around her index finger. “I’m not supposed to say who it was. Something about it putting them in danger,” Harry said. “But it was one of the Order members,” he added slyly. “Well, I don’t think Snape would have played games with you,” Ginny mused. “And I know it wasn’t anyone from my family.” Ginny looked at Harry and suddenly it dawned on her. “It was Tonks! She got called away for an assignment and had to miss dinner!” “I’ll never tell,” Harry replied playfully. “You don’t have to, I figured it out!” Ginny said triumphantly. “Maybe…” “Oh, I know I did,” Ginny said. “Whatever,” Harry chuckled as he rolled his eyes. Ginny waited until Harry was looking away and she reached for his book. “Aha!” she exclaimed as she pulled the book into her lap. “Why can’t I read the title?” “Give that back!” Harry said, reaching for the book. “I don’t think so,” she teased, holding the book out of his reach. “Not until you tell me what kind of book this is, and why it’s charmed so I can’t read it.” “Ginny,” Harry said testily. “Now I know you don’t want me to start spreading rumors about you around the house.” “You wouldn’t,” she challenged, putting the book behind her back.. “You’re right, they won’t be rumors, they’ll be fun childhood stories,” Harry grinned. “Then I’ll just have to return the favor,” Ginny replied. “Everyone knows all about me,” Harry said. “Not everything.” Harry crossed his arms over his chest and sighed. “If you really must know, it’s the Biography of Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.” Ginny raised an eyebrow at him. “Why in the world are you reading that?” Shaking his head, he looked away. “You wouldn’t understand.” “Maybe I’ll surprise you if you gave me a chance.” “I wasn’t aware that you wanted one.” “I thought we’d been through this already,” Ginny sighed, setting his book back down on the table. “So, that must have been some talk with Ron.” “What do you mean?” Ginny asked, raising an eyebrow questioningly. “Well, you’re talking to me like you don’t hate me. I didn’t think that was possible,” Harry replied with a shrug. Ginny was about to argue with him but stopped to think about what he had said. It was true; before this weekend, she had held a certain amount of bitterness towards him. Even when they had been getting along, she was still resentful of what he had done to Ron. It was like she had a pit of anger manifesting inside her that she hadn’t even known existed. “You’re right,” she said quietly. “I’m sorry.” “You don’t have to be, I didn’t expect anything else. When you sent my letters back unopened, I knew that the damage ran pretty deep. Honestly, I’m more surprised that the resentment isn’t there now than I was that it was there before,” Harry said quickly, looking down at his hands. “Again, I’m sorry…” Ginny’s voice trailed off as she realized exactly what Harry had said. “I didn’t get any letters!” she exclaimed. “I sent you and Ron letters everyday for a week right after I left Hogwarts!” Harry cried. “And everyday, when I got home, they were waiting there for me!” Ginny jumped up from the couch and paced the floor as she tried to process the information. She felt her anger bubbling up in her chest and the urge to kick something. She took several deep breaths and tried to push her anger back down. “I never got any letters… maybe Hedwig messed up,” she muttered to herself. “Ginny, listen to yourself; Hedwig mess up?” Harry said calmly. “No, there’s a reasonable explanation for this. Ron got the letters and sent them back. His first letter was the only one that had been opened.” Ginny’s face turned red and she finally lost control of the anger she had been battling with. She stopped her pacing and turned to face Harry fully, her hands clenched into fists at her sides. “How dare he decide whether or not I get your letters! Ron is my brother, not my keeper! He can’t make that kind of a decision for me!” “He was hurt–he still is hurt. He just wants answers for me that I can’t give him, and he’s too proud to ask Hermione,” Harry replied, looking towards the door. “How can you stay so calm?” Ginny yelled. “Look at me!” Harry turned his head and their eyes met. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about it,” he said softly. “Getting angry with you isn’t going to change anything.” “Well, it’s not normal to be so calm!” Ginny insisted angrily. “In fact, your calmness is annoying me! I mean, my idiotic brother kept your letters from me to ensure that I would stay mad at you as long as he did! It wasn’t right and you know it!” But before Harry could respond, MJ and Wesley walked into the room, carrying their overnight bags. “Well, well. What do we have here?” MJ said slyly, dropping his bags on the floor. “A lover’s spat?” “No!” Ginny exclaimed, still furious. She took a deep breath and tried to calm down. “We were just discussing my brother.” “Which one?” Wesley asked, dropping his bag beside MJ’s. “Ron,” she replied tensely. “He seemed to be an okay bloke at the press conference,” MJ said. “Although he didn’t seem to care much for Potter, or you talking to him for that matter.” “He is okay most of the time,” Ginny replied, rolling her eyes. “He just thinks he knows what’s best for everyone and doesn’t bother to see what everyone else wants. And you’re right, he doesn’t like Harry, or me talking to him.” “What?” Wesley asked. Ginny shook her head. “Never mind. Why don’t you guys go get settled back in. Lunch should be ready in about thirty minutes. Hopefully, everyone will be back by then.” Ginny walked up the stairs to her own room and threw herself down on her bed. She was caught between wanting to cry and wanting to strangle Ron. She couldn’t comprehend how Harry had been so calm about the whole situation. She really couldn’t believe how he’d been so nice to her, apologizing for everything when he thought that she hadn’t even acknowledged his prior attempts to explain himself. It was only then that Ginny realized that Harry never had actually explained himself; she still didn’t have the answers she desperately wanted. She wanted to kill Ron for sending her letters back; for sending away the only explanation she’d ever come close to getting. Ginny groaned and got out of bed. She knew that it would probably be a long time before she got Harry alone and talking openly again. She headed back downstairs and found Tank, Jacob, Dustin, and Harry sitting talking in the living room. “Hello, Ginny,” Jacob called looking up from the paper he was reading. “Hello,” she answered in what she hoped was a cheerful voice. “Did you all have a nice weekend?” “It was too short,” Tank said. “I’m going to miss all of the morning sickness and stuff like that this time.” “You’re actually going to miss it?” Dustin asked chuckling. “Oh, just wait until you have kids, Jake,” Tank said happily, slapping Jacob on the back. “The morning sickness, the mood swings, it’s great!” “Well, you should be used to the mood swings after living with Potter,” MJ teased as he, Jeff, and Wesley walked back down the stairs. “Hey!” Harry cried as he threw a pillow at MJ. “I’m not that bad!” “No, I think you may be worse than a pregnant woman,” Wesley said seriously. “At least they’re good for something.” Wesley winked at Ginny suggestively. “Okay, that’s enough of that!” Ginny said laughing, feeling some of the lead she felt she had been carrying around lift from her stomach. “Let’s go eat lunch before you lot destroy my innocence.” Ginny batted her eyes and put her hands over her heart. “Who said you were innocent?” Harry challenged, raising an eyebrow. “Hey!” Ginny cried. “He’s right, you know,” Tank said. “I don’t think anyone could grow up with Fred and George and still call themselves innocent.” “Too true,” Ginny admitted with a grin. “Now can we please eat?” Ginny was sitting in the living room reading through her notes about the team’s schedule for the week. They had been out at practice for an hour, and it had just started to rain. She had conjured up towels for everyone, unsure if practice would be called off because of the weather. She should have known that Mason would want to make them practice even longer in the bad weather. It was almost two hours later when the team came back inside, dripping wet, and they immediately went for the towels waiting for them by the door. “Thanks,” Jeff said as he stripped off his muddy Quidditch robes. “Yeah, very thoughtful,” Tank said as he followed Jeff’s example. Soon Ginny was in a room with seven wet, dirty, partially dressed Quidditch players. It took great restraint on her part not to stare at any of them. She quickly came to the conclusion that Wesley and MJ were in the best shape of the bunch, and that, excluding Harry, Jacob was the scrawniest. Tank and Dustin both appeared to be in good shape, despite probably both being past their prime, and Jeff was simply too bulky for her taste. Once she stopped discreetly admiring their figures, she noticed that Jacob was holding his neck. “Are you okay, Jacob?” she asked. “Yeah, just a little sore from a run in with a Bludger,” he replied, sneaking a glance at Jeff. Ginny shot Jeff a dirty look as she set her book down and walked over to Jacob. “Hey! It’s our job to try and hit players with the Bludgers,” Jeff said defensively. “Yeah, yeah, I know,” Ginny said. “But you should probably try to be a bit more careful in practice. Do you need to go to St. Mungo’s?” “No, I’m fine, just a little sore,” Jacob assured her. “At least let me look at it,” Ginny insisted. She led Jacob over to where she had been sitting and retook her spot in the chair while forcing Jacob down on the floor in front of her. After she was certain there wasn’t any permanent damage, she began to massage Jacob’s neck and shoulders. “Hey, Jeff, hit me with a Bludger next practice,” Tank teased, sending Jeff an exaggerated wink. “I like the looks of that treatment.” Jacob turned bright red and quickly pulled away from Ginny. “I feel better now,” he stuttered. “Good,” Ginny said, chuckling. She turned to the others and noticed that Harry had transfigured his towel into a robe. “Well, somebody was thinking.” “Potter, will you do mine?” Wesley asked sweetly. Harry pulled out his wand and turned Wesley’s towel into bright pink, fluffy bathrobe that looked remarkably like a poodle. “Thanks a lot,” Wesley muttered, causing everyone else to crack up. “If you didn’t want to do it you should have just said so.” “Anyone else?” Harry asked. “No, thanks,” Jeff answered. “I’m just going to go grab a shower.” “Me, too,” Tank answered. All six men eyed one another, and before Ginny could say anything, they were all running up the stairs, fighting to get into the bathrooms first; everyone but Harry. “Don’t you care about being clean?” Ginny asked him. “Well, when I got Tank’s room, I got my own bathroom,” Harry explained with a grin. “Ahh. You still never really said why you wanted your own room,” Ginny said. “I know,” Harry replied. “So are you going to?” “Nope,” Harry answered. “Will you tell me what the letters said, then?” Ginny asked. “This isn’t the time or the place,” he replied quietly, choosing to look at the floor rather at Ginny. “So, when is the right time and place?” Ginny asked, her voice starting to rise. She sat forward in her chair and she could feel her anger returning. She realized that she had subconsciously clenched her hands into fists. “I don’t know.” “You just know it’s not right now!” By now, she was yelling at him. Her desire for answers was clouding her normally good judgment. “Why do you feel it’s so important to keep secrets from everyone?” Harry’s face flushed. “Did it ever occur to you that knowing my secrets put people in danger? Or maybe that the secrets I have aren’t mine to tell? Or that I couldn’t tell you my secrets even if I wanted to?” he yelled, finally looking at her. “That wasn’t a problem in the past,” Ginny snapped. She faltered slightly when she noticed that his eyes looked dead and lifeless despite their current heated argument. She shivered involuntarily as it reminded her of the way he looked in her dream. “And look how well that turned out!” Harry turned and ran up the stairs, almost knocking Tank down on the way. Ginny collapsed on the couch and angrily stared at the ceiling. “You okay?” Tank asked, sitting down on the couch near her. “Fine,” Ginny replied, refusing to look him in the eye. “You’re not a very good liar.” Ginny couldn’t help but smile. She turned her attention from the ceiling and looked at the man she was beginning to have great respect for. “Actually, I really am. Just not when I’m this emotional… I normally have better control over my emotions.” “So you’ll at least admit you’re emotional,” Tank said. “I don’t think any kind of lie could hide that.” She chuckled. “You two really need to settle things. I thought you two had reached some kind of an understanding,” Tank said. “We did, but then I found out some things. I have so many questions and he just refuses to answer,” Ginny sighed. “If I could just find out why he did some of the things he did, it would really help me find closure to everything.” And maybe I could finally deal with everything, she added silently. “Did you ever think that maybe talking about it hurts him?” Tank asked. “Maybe had already found closure, and you wanting to bring it up again is really painful for him?” “How’d you get to be so smart?” Ginny asked. “Lots of life experience. Plus, I’m a dad. I think when your first child is born, you automatically increase your knowledge of life.” “Maybe that’s what I need to do, have a kid,” Ginny replied smiling. “For some reason, while I think you would be an excellent mum, your dad and brothers would probably want to kill me for putting that idea in your head. You should probably wait until you’re in love and married,” Tank said. “Oh, I don’t know,” Ginny mused. “I think I’ll go write them all right now and tell them what you suggested.” “You wouldn’t dare!” “Well, I’m going up to my room to get cleaned up for dinner, I guess you’ll just have to wait and see if I write them or not,” Ginny said playfully. She stuck her tongue out at him and ran up the stairs to her room. She was surprised by how comfortable she felt around Tank; it reminded her of how things used to be like with her brothers. For some reason, Tank made her feel young again, but she was surprised to realize that it was a good feeling. It reminded her of a time when her biggest worry was not embarrassing herself in front of Harry. She climbed the flight of stairs to get to her bedroom and started to get ready for bed. The day had been emotionally exhausting for her; just living with Harry was like being on an emotional rollercoaster. She had a few things she needed to do before she went to bed, but the big soft bed seemed to be calling to her, so she decided to lie down for a few moments before taking care of the last of her responsibilities for the day. A few moments after her head hit the pillow, she was out like a light. Ginny was sitting in the Great Hall, staring at the ceiling. She was waiting for something; she could feel it in the pit of her stomach, but she couldn’t figure out what it was. She was alone at the Gryffindor table, and there wasn’t another soul in the Great Hall. The ceiling looked like a stormy night sky, and while Ginny normally enjoyed storms, this one was sending shivers down her spine. The only sound in the large room was the crack of lightning and rolling thunder, and there was almost tangible electricity in the room. Suddenly, a bolt of lightning struck down in the empty place at the table beside Ginny. She screamed and tried to move from her place but she seemed to be glued to the bench. She frantically tried to push herself away from the table, but the harder she pushed, the less she could move. “Hello, Ginny.” Ginny’s jaw dropped as she heard the voice of her old roommate Claudia. The girl’s long blonde hair was in a messy plait, blood was still dripping from her freckled forehead down to her cheek, just like it had during the final battle. Her robes were covered in what Ginny could only assume was a combination of mud and blood. “What are you doing here?” she asked shakily. “You’re, you’re…” “Dead?” Claudia said, laughing maliciously. “You’re happy I’m dead, aren’t you?” “No, I’m not,” Ginny stammered. “Admit it. You never liked me,” Claudia taunted her. “You always said that you just wished I’d go away and never come back.” “But that doesn’t mean I wished you were dead!” Ginny insisted. “You never approved of my going out with your brother.” “You were all wrong for each other! You didn’t even have a real interest in him, other than his bloodlines!” “You were jealous that Dumbledore made me prefect over you,” Claudia accused. “No! I didn’t even want to be prefect!” Ginny was now trying desperately to get away from the table as the storm raged on above and now beside her. “You sure did quickly jump at the chance to fill my shoes after I died though, didn’t you?” “I didn’t have a choice! They needed a leader, and almost everyone was in the hospital,” Ginny said, her voice pleading with the other girl to understand. “You saw me die,” Claudia accused calmly. “You watched me die, and you did nothing to help me.” “There was nothing I could do,” she sobbed. “If I had stopped fighting, I would have been killed as well!” “Liar. You wanted me to die. You wanted me to disappear, to be removed from your life. You were glad I was gone.” “No!” Ginny’s shoulders were shaking as she cried. “Admit it, deep down, you were glad it was me. I can see the thoughts running inside your mind. You were grateful it was me who died instead of someone you loved. You were happy that it was me instead of one of your pathetic little friends.” Something inside Ginny snapped and her guilt turned to anger. “Of course I didn’t want anyone else I loved to die!” she yelled. “If someone had to die, I would rather it was you than another one of my brothers or my father!” “Or the boy you loved who never gave you a second look?” Claudia taunted. “That’s not fair,” Ginny said softly. “He cared about me…” Her voice trailed off as she considered everything that Claudia had been saying. It was true that Harry had never admitted to her that he cared about her as anything more than a friend, but at one time, she felt sure he saw her as more than a little sister. But now that she was faced with the facts, she began to doubt what at one point she felt was true. Maybe Harry never saw her as anything but a little sister, a substitute while Ron and Hermione were busy. Maybe that was why one their one date was so disastrous. “Your mail has come,” Claudia spoke up, breaking Ginny away from her thoughts. Ginny looked up towards the sky, expecting to see Errol or Pig flying towards her. Instead a large dragon soared into the Great Hall, lighting up the room with fire. Ginny was frozen in place. It didn’t matter how much Charlie loved dragons or how many times he claimed they were harmless unless you threatened them, she was terrified. “She’s got your mail,” Claudia said again. Shaking, Ginny looked up towards the dragon and realized that it actually did have a parcel hanging from one of its front legs. She watched in horror as the dragon came closer and closer. As the creature got nearer, it began to shrink in size, until it was about the size of an owl. It landed on the table directly in front of Ginny. She saw that it was her name on the parcel, but she was afraid to take it from the dragon. “It’s from Harry,” Claudia mocked, obviously amused at Ginny’s dilemma. Pushing through her fear, Ginny slowly extended her hand toward the parcel. Immediately, the dragon snapped at her hand, causing Ginny to jerk her hand away. “You can’t have them, can’t you see?” Claudia asked, laughing. Ginny turned her attention away from the dragon so she could glare at the girl taunting her. Before she knew what was happening, she was being pulled from the bench by the dragon’s hind legs. She screamed and tried to kick her way free as the now fully sized dragon carried her to the top of the room. As soon as it couldn’t go any higher, it released its grip on her and she plummeted towards the ground. She kept falling, feeling like she was heading towards an endless black pit, all the while Claudia’s laughter rang through her ears. Ginny sat straight up in bed, panting. She was covered in sweat, and she could still hear the horrible, manic laughter in her mind. She didn’t know what had driven her to dream of Claudia. As horrible as it had sounded, Ginny had barely spared the girl a thought since Claudia died. Claudia was one of four Gryffindor girls in Ginny’s year, and they hadn’t gotten along from the very start. Claudia was beautiful with her shiny blonde hair and big blue eyes, the kind of girl that made Ginny feel inadequate. She was mean to Ginny, and she had tried her hardest to make the other girls in the dorm not like Ginny. It had just been one more step that had pushed Ginny to confide in Tom. Claudia had ended up going out with Ron for a brief time during her fifth year. It had caused a real rift between Ron and Ginny, and it was just one more reason why Ginny didn’t like the girl. The relationship had eventually ended when Ron discovered that Claudia wasn’t much more than a snob. She shook her head as if the gesture would take away the memories. These were the kinds of things she had worked so hard so protect herself from. She made herself get out of bed and went to sit down at her desk. After pulling out her notes, Ginny went back to work. She needed a distraction from her mind; otherwise she might have to remember the things she so desperately wanted to forget. |
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